Mistakes, we all do them. Small or big mistakes, we eventually end up doing both of them. But are they really mistakes? If they are to us, are they to others as well? Was it my mistake for liking Sehun? Or was it his? But if there is one mistake that we both made, we followed our hearts and in the end got them destroyed. Who would love such rotten people like Sehun and I--apparently, Sehun and I. Because we are idiots, and because we were too blind to see the obvious signs earlier. But it’s okay, because like I said...time heals eventually your wounds.

After leaving Sehun, I felt heartless once again. I couldn’t cry anymore, my tears were gone for a long time. But my heart, it was throbbing with pain more and more as far as I got from his apartment, the bus taking me back to So Young unnie. When she saw me, I didn’t have to say anything, she instantly knew.

“He didn’t do it, and you’ll see--life has a funny way, one day it might happen” She whispered softly as she hugged me to her, caressing my head. I nodded, throat dry and eyes burning. No more tears, we are done.

My parents were surprised to see my red eyes, I lied that we watched a drama in school and it was too heartbreaking that almost everyone ended up crying their hearts out. Unfortunately, that drama was too real for me and only two people cried, to others it didn’t matter, not like they knew.

The alarm made me sigh as I rose from the bed, closing it. Rubbing my eyes, I got out of bed and went to the bathroom, to get ready for another day. Descending the stairs, I heard whispers coming from the kitchen. Hiding behind the door, I decided to eavesdrop on my parents.

“Miso, I think there’s something wrong with Chae-Yeong” My dad said hushed.

“What is wrong with her?” Obviously, it’s not like mom cares about me since Bo-Yeong is gone.

“You really believe the story she told yesterday?”

“I mean, I cried at movies too” Mom sounded like she scoffed.

“Miso, something is hurting Chae-Yeong, talk to her”

“Why don’t you talk to her? I don’t think there’s anything wrong with her. She’s always been like this, you should be glad she’s showing some emotion. After Bo-Yeong--you never saw her with an expression on her face”

“Have you ever wondered why?” My dad sounded like he was starting to get angry “Do you ever wonder how she coped with losing her sister? When was the last time you asked her how kids are in her school? Did it never occur to you she’s getting bullied?”

“Bullied? Chae-Yeong?”

“Yes, I’ve been writing articles about it. I know when I see one Miso”

Then why did he never say anything about it? Why did he never try and help me out? Or try and scare the bully off?

“When she’s ready, she will tell us”

Mom is right, when I’m ready, they’ll know. Not waiting anymore, I walked inside without saying anything. I went to the fridge and opened it to find it almost empty.

“Ah, I fell asleep yesterday night--” Dad chuckled, masking the frustration he felt because of mom’s earlier words “And I didn’t go grocery shopping yet”

“It’s fine, I’ll eat in the canteen” I muttered, washing an apple for me to eat.

“When are your exams starting, Chae-Yeong?” Mom asked, arms crossed in front of her.

“In three days” I answered her, biting into the apple.

“Did you study for them?” She continued, always the one to pressure me about studying.

“Kinda, I’m staying in school for longer to study” I took my backpack, walking to the hallway to get my cardigan and shoes.

“Don’t stress too much, you’ll do fine” Dad kissed my temple when I was ready to go and I quietly greeted them, quickly leaving. I know mom doesn’t care that much about me, but she could at least say those things somewhere else or some time when she knows I’m not home. I don’t want another heartache, one is more than enoughly painful.

Being in school around the period of exams always felt weird. The school was for once quiet and everyone had their heads buried in books, ignoring everyone and everything else. I don’t have to study very hard, I always study in time. I just need to do a big revision and clear the things I wasn’t sure about.

Half of the day passed and I didn’t see a trace of Sehun. It felt weird, because I knew he was in school. When I came in the morning, his locker wasn’t closed, meaning he came to his locker to get his books. It felt like he was running away from me now, and it felt weird. But it was doing good for my heartache, I’m sure seeing him would have made it worse.

“Do you want to go to the canteen?” Kyungsoo quietly asked when the long break approached. He knew something was off, it was too obvious. He didn’t see Sehun all day, he knew something happened...but he didn’t push it, he knows it’s not his job to do that.

“I don’t have lunch, so let’s go” I took off, Kyungsoo followed after me quietly. I met up with Wendy earlier and we agreed to meet up in the library after classes to get some studying done, Kyungsoo was joining us too.

“How are you feeling?” Kyungsoo glanced at me as I let out a long sigh.

“Bad, I feel very bad” I muttered, staring at the floor as we walked “I feel like the pain is becoming more powerful”

“What happened to you?” He softly asked, resting one hand on my shoulder.

“I realized too late” I shrugged, pushing the canteen doors open.

“It’s about Sehun, right?” Kyungsoo had a grim expression and I suddenly felt very bad for him. Did he feel like this because of me? Was his heart breaking every day a little bit more because he knew we weren’t going to happen? How could he still walk, eat, smile and be happy when I could barely function? Suddenly, I felt like the worst person. Stopping in the middle of the canteen, I turned around and Kyungsoo stared at me surprised.

“I’m so sorry” I whispered, hugging him tightly “I didn’t know--I really didn’t know--”

“What? Chae-Yeong?” Kyungsoo sounded so confused as he returned my hug. How could he hang out with me without hating me?

“I’m hurting so much, and if this is the same thing you had to go through too--I’m just really sorry, I had no idea before” I explained, guilt eating me alive.

“Chae-Yeong” Kyungsoo chuckled as he pulled away from my grip “We feel differently, I knew so I was prepared. I didn’t force it, because I know you wouldn’t return it. When you already know, it doesn’t hurt”

“But still, I’m a horrible person” I looked down and Kyungsoo shook his head, leading me to the lane for food.

“You are a good person, too good” He patted my head and for the first time I grinned a little, Kyungsoo’s words reassuring. We stayed quiet as we waited for our turn to buy the food, and I took my time to look around. Some people had their eyes on me, but I just ignored them. Wendy was waving at me when we made eye contact and I chuckled quietly, nodding at her. She’s always so happy and excited, I don’t know how she does it. Taking a step ahead, I looked at the end of the line, heart clenching a little. Sehun just took the food from the serving lady and turn around to go to his table. Accidentally, our eyes met and it was the worst feeling to have him hold my gaze only to look away like we didn’t know each other. Isn’t this what you wanted, Chae-Yeong? You wanted this, now act like it and think like it. Who’s fault is it? Ours.

I was too lost in thought that I almost didn’t hear the lady asking me what I wanted for lunch. Since I didn’t have much money, a little sandwich was enough for today. While taking the money out from my purse, my eyes landed on a phone that was beside the cashier, right underneath my hand. Someone left it here? Looking around, I didn’t see anyone looking for it. Was it the lady’s phone?

“Dear, here” She said, handing me the tray. I knew I was going to hold back the line but two seconds wouldn’t kill anyone.

“Excuse me, is that your phone?” I pointed at the phone as I watched the lady.

“My phone--isn’t that you in the picture?” The lady looked amused “It’s your phone, nice joke, dear”

As I looked down, my eyebrows furrowed. The lady was already asking Kyungsoo what he wanted. My phone? My picture? Since when do I own such expensive phone. As I picked it up, the screen lit up and I stared astonished at the lockscreen. It really was a picture of me. Watching it closely, it was taken in that old ramen place. Biting my lower lip, I realized it’s Sehun’s phone. And after everything...he still has me as his lockscreen.

“Oh, got my food we can--hey, what are you doing with Sehun’s phone?” Kyungsoo gazed curiously at me and I quickly pushed it in his hands.

“I found it beside the cashier, can you give it back to him?” I spoke as we started heading back to our table.

“Can’t you--” When he looked at me, I just raised my eyebrows and Kyungsoo pursed his lips “Right, I forgot. I’ll be right back”

I placed both our plates on the table as Kyungsoo hurried away with Sehun’s phone.

“Hi!” Wendy was excited as she sat beside her brother.

“Hey” I muttered back with a small smile.

“I feel like my head will explode” Jackson sighed as he munched on some french fries.

“Is it that bad?” I asked with a chuckle, getting ready to eat the sandwich.

“I’m freaking stressed. I have no idea what these things mean!” He exclaimed as he pointed at the problem he had to solve at Chemistry.

“Mom told you to study but you were too busy with going to football” Wendy smirked as she looked at Jackson “But of course, a stupid boy can’t do much”

Jackson glared at Wendy as he continued learning quietly.

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