That day, Tao went to work and you decided to go with him with Si Jung. You won’t be able to talk to him nor even see him since he’ll be on stage while you’ll be in the waiting room but still went. Tao didn’t stop you because he wanted to be with you guys as well even if it was just being on the same building.

You looked at Si Jung and kissed his head as he played with the button on your jacket. “Omma loves you baby. You know that, right?” you asked and he looked up and smiled at you making you smile back and blink your eyes to avoid the tears you’ve been holding from falling.

I’m still dazed about it. I can’t believe we’ve come to this. I have mixed feelings and to be honest, I just want to go to the orphanage and get an adoption petition. But I have to talk this out with my husband. I’m sure he’s with me on this one.

Tao’s schedules ended and the three of you ate on a buffet. The mood was quite solemn and you decided to open up the topic of adoption.

“Chuhan.” You called, wiping your mouth with the table napkin. Tao was starting to worry because you didn’t eat ¼ of your usual meal.

“Hm?” he looked at you. “Are you okay?” he asked and looked at your plate again.

“I don’t know.” You shook your head and both of you just looked at each other’s eyes. Silence passed and you took a deep breath before helping Si Jung with his plate of fruits. “I want to adopt Si Jung.” You told and waited for your husband’s reaction. “And I want to know what you think about it.” You added and he sighed before nodding.

“Rei, you know I do love you and Si Jung, right?” he asked and you nodded silently, avoiding eye contact and afraid of what he’ll going to say next so you focused on feeding the baby. “But you also know that it won’t be easy, right?” he asked. “The adoption process, taking care of him and more. It’s more than this Rei.” He told and you nodded.

“Aren’t we fine now?” you asked, still looking anywhere but Tao. “The only difference is that when the program ends, Si Jung will be officially ours by paper and there will be no cameras to film us in everything we do.” You said.

“What about our jobs then?” Tao asked. “Are you sure you can still handle it? We both know it’s almost impossible for us to meet and even film this show because of our schedules. And if it wasn’t for this program we won’t even be able to see each other for at least one in three months.” He explained and you finally looked at him.

“Are you saying what I think your saying?” you looked at him with a blank expression.

“I was upset.” You admitted. “I know he was just thinking about me and Si Jung but I don’t think I can live without one of them. I can’t believe he’s even thinking of not having Si Jung and returning him to the orphanage.” Your eyes were getting teary just by the thought of it. “I know I’m not the best mother and I won’t always be there to watch over him because of my job but I’ll make sure he gets all the love and support he’ll need.”

“It’s not like that.” He sighed. “Of course I want Si Jung to stay. But it’ll be unfair for him to grow up without his parents watching over him. We all know that our jobs aren’t like any other normal jobs. Everyone will know everything about us and he’ll be watched in everything he does as he grows up. I’m just scared that because of it, Si Jung will regret having us as parents when he grows up.” He held his head down and wiped his tears.

“Rei, baby, it’s not like that.” He said in a hushed voice. “Please understand. We’re both busy and it’ll be unfair for him if he grows up with us always working. And you and I know that there’s no such thing as privacy in our lives. Once Si Jung becomes ours, he’ll probably get watched in everything he does.” He explicated and you just nodded, uninterested. You got his point but since you’re upset and didn’t want to lash on him, you bit your tongue back.

Dinner went with an awkward and heavy silence and the three of you went back to your home. As soon as Tao stopped the engine, you went out of the car and took out your son not even waiting for Tao to finish getting the rest of Si Jung’s things out of the car. You went straight into your unit and then to Si Jung’s room. The baby was already asleep so you took off his clothes and let him sleep with just his diapers on.

You watched Si Jung sleep in silence as you stood there beside his crib in silence. You didn’t even hear the door open and only felt Tao hugging you from behind, resting his chin on your shoulder.

“I’m sorry, babe.” He said and that made you frown. “Maybe we could take him back in a few years—“ that was the last straw. You turned to give him a disappointed look and then took the sleeping baby in your arms before going out of the room. You placed Si Jung on your bed and started packing the baby’s things.

“Rei, what are you doing?” Tao was trailing you wherever you go. “Please understand.” He tried to convince you but it was too late. You couldn’t hear anything anymore. You were too upset to listen to anything.

You finished dressing Si Jung up and wiped the tears that unknowingly fell from your eyes. You picked the baby up and took the bag. “Let’s stop talking for now. We’re staying at Dara unnie’s tonight.” You told and left leaving Tao astounded in your bedroom.

He was too shocked to follow you and minutes after your leave, he slowly sat on the bed and buried his face with his hands, crying.

It wasn’t easy for me either. I just want the best for Si Jung and her. I was scared and shocked that night I couldn’t sleep. And the fact that my family left made it worst. It was a mess.

Off recording…

The Parks just finished eating supper when the doorbell rang. Thunder was at home because it was his day off while Dara was spending the night overseas.

“Cheondung-ah! The door.” Mrs. Park shouted from the kitched and the idol went out of his room to open the door.

“Rei?” he asked, seeing you on the screen. “Open.” You said, sniffing and he immediately opened the door before darting his way to the door to the elevator to meet you at the main entrance and help your with the things you were carrying and his nephew.

The elevator opened up and a worried brother greeted you. “Hey. Shhhh. It’s okay.” He took you for a hug before taking the bad and the sleeping Si Jung from you. You followed him inside the elevator and he silently led you inside their house.

He was curious and furious seeing you cry but most of all he was worried. Of course, he was also curious of what happened but decided to put the questions aside for now.

“Who was that, honey?” Mrs. Park went out of the kitchen and her eyes lit up the moment she saw you and your son but the smile immediately disappeared when she saw your face. ”Oh, Rei-ya— What’s wrong honey?” She asked and t