“Just promise me that no matter what struggles we go through together, we will always come back to each other in the end.”

The girl leaned in and gave her wife a kiss, “There is no need to promise things that we already understand, but I will promise that my love for you will never die and that love will always bring me back to your arms.”

Taeyeon looked at the picture of her wife while they were on their honeymoon together. A picture that never left her desk since it was placed there 8 years prior. For a month now, she had to continuously look at that photo thinking Jessica just is working later because she was busier and not because she might be doing something else in the office. But it was hard to convince herself of things like that when Jessica would come home smelling different each night. Yet it was even harder for Taeyeon to face the problems head on...she was never ready for the unknown.

Taeyeon looked at the clock telling her it was time to go home. She packed her things and readied to head out. She was just another ordinary office worker unlike her wife who was the head of some huge department. No question about it, Taeyeon’s wife was the one who made most of the money in their household causing Taeyeon to always be the first one home, the one to cook the food and the first to offer comfort to a very stressed out wife.

The keys jingled as she turned them into the door to unlock the door. She carefully pulled off her heals and rubbed her sore feet before fumbling to find the light in the dark home. Taeyeon sighed as she put her purse on the table before pulling up her sleeves so she could make dinner. Although she knew Jessica might not be coming home till late, Taeyeon always hoped that her wife would arrive at home on time like usual and her wife would give her a backhug whilst telling her “I am home.” And then Taeyeon would ask her about her day but that cycle of warmth was broken making Taeyeon feel cold and alone.

Taeyeon turned off the flame and scooped the pasta onto a single plate before taking the food into the family room so she could watch the news in the comfort of the couch. She glanced at the clock one more time before taking out some Tupperware so she could pack the rest of the food away since it seemed Jessica would be working late again. Carefully the food was put into the fridge and she took out a bottle of water before returning to her food waiting in the family room. She settled herself on the couch and distracted herself with the news.

It must have been hours since the news ended and Taeyeon was watching some sitcom when she heard the door open, “Babe?”

Taeyeon looked over to her wife and smiled, “Worked late again?”

“Yea. I am a bit tired.”

“Food is in the fridge.” Taeyeon got up to put her plate in the sink, but her wife stopped her and gave her a peck on the lips. Yes Taeyeon smelled the unfamiliar scent again but she tried to push the nauseating feeling aside, “I ah am going to shower while you eat.” She needed an escape so she went to the only place she could cry without someone hearing her whimpers of desperation.

Taeyeon was already in bed when a freshly showered wife joined her. Out of habit and comfort to claim what she still had left, Taeyeon went to hold her wife from behind. She snuggled in close to smell the scent that was solely her wife and feel the warmth that she could only have at night. Of course Taeyeon’s heart ached but how could she not want to keep what she loved close to her? Love was the only thing that she felt kept her alive and the only person who made her heart swell was the woman she married.

Several hours of sleep was all Taeyeon got before she felt the person in her arms turning,  “Sica...are you still awake?”  Taeyeon turned to look at her bedside clock, “It is 4am, why are you not sleeping?”

Jessica turned to face Taeyeon and gave her a peck on the lips, “Just a little stressed. Nothing to worry about babe.”  Taeyeon melted in the warmth that she still believed was real, “You need sleep too.”

Taeyeon held her wife close when she readjusted to breathe into the crook of Taeyeon’s neck, “Stop working so late so you don’t come home stressed.”

Taeyeon heard nothing come from the later so all she could do was hold her wife tighter and enjoy the warmth of her petite body, but she couldn’t bear to ask her wife about her secrets. She didn’t want another string to break on the dangerous rope she walked that only had death on one end.

--------------------------

Taeyeon was in the elevator of Jessica’s office. She was hoping to catch the girl either on the way home or if she was working late, Taeyeon needed had the girl’s favorite snack to energize her. When they were first married, Taeyeon would always come and visit the girl at the office but that was before Jessica got a promotion a few years back. After that, Taeyeon knew her wife was busy at work and didn’t want to interrupt her work now that she had a much more important position. But today she thought she would surprise the girl when her coworker happened to give Taeyeon Jessica’s favorite snack cakes. It wasn’t like they worked too far from each other so Taeyeon made an extra trip to meet her wife.

The elevator opened on one of the top floors where she got out to see an empty office and Jessica’s office closed at the far end. Wondering if Jessica left for home, Taeyeon approached the door slowly but stopped midway when she heard some and shuffling of papers, “Oh God Sica...please.”

Nothing could stop the tears that fell on her face at the moment with the confirmation of a shattered heart. Not wanting to be around this area full of filthy air, Taeyeon quickly caught the elevator again and went home. She pulled out her phone on the car ride with teary eyes, “Mom...can I come home this weekend?”

When Taeyeon arrived home, she didn’t bother to lock the door and went to the kitchen to warm up a pot of water before stripping down her clothes into something comfortable. She didn’t bother with a shower and decided to quickly pack her things so she could throw them into the car before her wife came home and suspected something. Although her wife needed to know how hurt she was, Taeyeon was never rash in her decisions so she decided to just get away and deal with her problems in a house that Jessica was not allowed to enter.

Food was quickly devoured and Taeyeon went to rest quickly on the couch with the TV still on. When the door opened, Taeyeon heard her wife enter but afraid to face the woman who was screaming out another’s name probably just a few minutes before, Taeyeon kept her eyes shut. She heard her wife calling her out several times but stopped when a brush of someone close was near her.  Without Jessica having to say a word, she readjusted Taeyeon to lay in a more comfortable position and put a blanket on her. Taeyeon wanted to cry with the simplest of actions from her wife. Although she just did something unforgivable a few hours earlier, Taeyeon still felt the love in all her careful actions. Yet she wasn’t able to sigh in relief until the lights went dark and the TV was muted.

Somehow her heart broke when a gentle touch came on her forehead followed with a kiss, “I love you.” Those words were bitter sweet because Taeyeon still actually believed in those words.

--------------------------

The sun was rising as Taeyeon took a long drive to her parent’s home. To make sure her wife wouldn’t worry, Taeyeon left a note saying where she would be and that would be enough for Jessica to leave her alone for the weekend. As always, Taeyeon’s home was never close to where she and her wife stayed so it would be close to lunch time by the time Taeyeon finally arrived.

When she got out of the car, Taeyeon just stood and looked at the house that she rarely comes to. It was because her parents never approved of the marriage that Taeyeon never bothered to return again but with the problems she had at home, Taeyeon had an urge to come to her parent’s house and never return to her home with Jessica.

“Taeyeon!” Taeyeon watched as her mother bolted out the door and gave her a tight hug, “Honey you are finally here! Your father and I missed you so much!”

Taeyeon was slowly losing oxygen with the amount of force her mother used to hug her, “I missed you too...”

To get a better look at her daughter, Mrs. Kim released the hug but held Taeyeon’s shoulders, “You look tired. Was the trip too long? Did you need to rest before lunch?”

Taeyeon shook her head, “No. I will eat first and then maybe have a nap. I really miss your food.”

Engulfing her daughter into a tight hug again, “I really missed you...” Taeyeon felt the warmth of being unconditionally wanted and for some reason it felt much different than being with Jessica, “Well come in. Your father wants to see you too.”

Taeyeon nodded and went to get her back from the back of the car before following her mother in the house. Upon entering, the smell of food filled her nosterals and she felt her body melt with familiarity although it had been years since she had been in the home. Yet it still felt like her home.

“Baby girl!”

Taeyeon turned to see her father and ran after to hug him, “Appa!”

Taeyeon had always been close to her father and he was the only one to somewhat approve of the marriage Taeyeon had with Jessica, but he still didn’t completely agree with Taeyeon’s choice in partner. He never had a son and always thought it would be nice for his daughter to marry a nice man so he could call that man his son. Yet Taeyeon somewhat disappointed him when she announced that Jessica, her college roommate, was actually a girl she had been dating for 2 years secretly and they had plans of marriage. That news crushed him much more than he would let Taeyeon knew.

“So how is business going?”

Taeyeon and her dad settled into the family room to chat while Taeyeon’s mother finished making lunch for the family, “Business is stable, but you never told your mother or I why you decided to visit. It surprised both me and your mother.”

Taeyeon have her father a sad smile, “I had a sudden urge to come home...but we can always talk about that later. I want to just spend some time here and with you and mother. I hope I am not inconveniencing you two.”

“Never! You can always come when you want. Your mom and I will always welcome you.”

Taeyeon smiled because this home was always very welcoming, but the unconditional love that her parents gave her was nothing like the love Jessica used to suffocate Taeyeon with. Maybe it was old memories that always kept Taeyeon hanging on but she still had some thinking to do. What better place than to go down memory lane in her old hometown?

After lunch, Taeyeon entered a blissful food coma and rested in her old room for a few hours. When she awoke her hand unconsciously looked for a body next to her, but it wasn’t there. It would never be there as long as she stayed in this home.

Taeyeon got up and started walking through her old room. She saw things from her life as she grew older. Her hands touched old objects that had some rooted memory but her hand stopped on a few objects that were solely related to Jessica. Even if it was just an object of Jessica, Taeyeon was still attracted to it. Thinking of something, Taeyeon went to her closet to dig out a box.

It was a simple brown cardboard box that had old school notebooks but there was a notebook she kept in there that was very important to her, “Why did I leave this here anyway?” After finding the red notebook, Taeyeon sat against her wall and opened it up to read what a younger Taeyeon was thinking. “Beautiful. So beautiful...” Taeyeon chuckled, “Seriously...that is all I wrote the first time I saw her? So descriptive there Taeyeon...” She flipped the pages some more until she saw another scribble, “Why is she sitting next to me again? Does she know that her perfume distracts me? Does she know that I can’t stop looking? Does she know that I loved her at first sight?” Taeyeon read a few more lines until she shut the notebook and sighed, “And you still love her you big idiot...” With a few light hits of her head on the wall, Taeyeon finally got up and put on her jacket to go out.

“Taeyeon dear where are you going?”

“Just for a walk. I will be back for dinner so don’t worry okay?”

“Alright dear.”

After slipping on her shoes, Taeyeon went out the door and fumbled her keys to her car to drive to a specific destination.

The car pulled up to a park but not a normal park that was bustling with people. It was a small area that most people didn’t know about but somewhere Taeyeon practically lived when she was little. It was situated next to a church and it was when Taeyeon was younger that she stumbled upon the grassy area with trees isolating it from the common eye. It was here that Taeyeon proposed to Jessica because she wanted to merge her past with her future.

“Taeyeon-ah where are you taking me?”

“Just keep the blindfold on, and be careful. I can’t have my girlfriend getting hurt.”

Jessica giggled as she held onto Taeyeon’s hand tightly, “Uhmm it smells like flowers here.”

The two stopped walking and Taeyeon went up to Jessica to take off the blindfold, “Here.”

Jessica readjusted her eyes to the bright light where she saw the bright green trees, tall grass and beautiful flowers, “Wow...this is amazing!”

“I used to play here a lot when I was younger. I have so many memories here.”

“I can see why. This place is amazing.”

“But there is one last memory I want to make here.” Jessica looked at Taeyeon who was already on her knees, “I am sure you heard this story from me so many times before, but the first time I saw you walk into my life, I was in love. So much in love that I vowed to keep you forever by my side no matter what. The love I have for you runs so deep that my whole body has already dedicated my all into being with you. Please let me have you and only you for the rest of my life because the day I part from you, would be that I my body ceases to function.”

Jessica was in tears, “A-are you asking to marry me?”

“Of course you silly girl. You see...this is a ring.”

Jessica giggled before going down and hugging Taeyeon, “I must be silly to have fallen for you too. I love you so much.”

With a wide grin, “So that is a yes?”

“Yes yes yes...a million times yes!”

Taeyeon played with the grass as she looked down at the spot that made her wife vow her life with her, “Did we really change so much?” With her hand grazing over the grass, Taeyeon continued to walk into the field until she was in the center where she could lay down. Looking up into the blue sky, Taeyeon closed her eyes, “Is it really impossible to promise forever?”

“Just promise me that no matter what struggles we go through together, we will always come back to each other in the end.”

The girl leaned in and gave her wife a kiss, “There is no need to promise things that we already understand, but I will promise that my love for you will never die and that love will always bring me back to your arms.”

Taeyeon suddenly opened her eyes when her phone rang, “Mom? Oh sorry I lost track of time, I am coming home now.”

Taeyeon got up and shook her head a bit before walking back to her car and driving home.

Dinner was silent as her parents looked at their daughter, “Taeyeon. Can you tell us why you are home? Your father and I talked...we are concerned.”

Taeyeon looked up from her food, “Jessica and I are having some problems and I wanted to clear my mind. You know get away from her for a while. I was afraid to tell you because umm well you know...”

Taeyeon’s dad sighed, “The only reason we were against it was because you were young. We didn’t want you to make vows and promises when you only had love to hold onto.”

“Then why was Jessica never allowed to come into this house after I told you about the engagement?”

“Since you have been gone, I talked to your mother and she is willing to accept your preference...if Jessica wants to come, then we are happy to have her.”

Taeyeon looked up at her parents, “Why the sudden change mom?”

“Just how you were selfish to love Jessica, I am guilty to being selfish myself by loving you. I want you around more and if you love Jessica, I am willing to let her into our lives. I want you to come home more often Taeyeon.”

Taeyeon pushed her food around while she thought, “Dad did you ever think what you would do if you found out mom cheated on you?”

Taeyeon’s parents exchanged glances but decided not to ask the obvious question, “Why would your mother cheat?”

“She cheated because the person she loved before you, came back into her life and tempted her to the point where she cheated...although mother still loves you.”

Taeyeon’s father thought about it some, “I should go punch that guy and win your mother back then right?”

Taeyeon laughed, “Are men always this violent?”

“It is just like if a burglar came into our home and threatened to take something I loved. I would do anything to protect what belongs to me. As a man, I have confidence in my strength.”

“So you would fight for mom even if she does something unforgivable?”

“Baby temptation is everywhere and we can choose to act on it or not. If your mother is weak, I feel like it my job to be strong for her and make sure that she doesn’t fall into that sin again.”

“Why not just get a divorce?”

Mr. Kim’s face became very gentle as he looked into his wife’s eyes, “you have no idea how much your mother and I love each other. I feel like fighting though an extremely tough time and overcoming mistrust is a much easier task that to have her out of my life.”

Taeyeon smiled, “Does love make us stupid?”

All the Kims started laughing, “Maybe it does baby girl.”

------------------------

Taeyeon felt fully rested although she just returned from a very long car ride from her parents. Jessica was sleeping when Taeyeon went into bed to join her wife in slumber, “Home?” Taeyeon looked at her wife who struggled out of her hold so she could look into her eyes.

“Humm...yea. Tired.”

Jessica leaned in to give her wife a long kiss, “It is a long trip.”

With a sudden wave of exhaustion, Taeyeon collapsed into the sheets but her eyes opened to meet Jessica’s again, “Did you wash the sheets?”

“I thought I should do some cleaning while you were gone. Not often do I get the home without you.”

Hear heart tore even more when she just realized who might have been in the sheets while she was away. Although she wanted to be strong, at least for tonight, Taeyeon couldn’t do that and weakened to the point where she couldn’t even touch her wife that night.  Yet her wife had other plans as Jessica leaned in to hug her to sleep.  Taeyeon heart fluttered some by her wife’s actions...Does love really make her stupid?

---------------------------

Taeyeon didn’t go home that night after work. She remembered what her father said and well discarded the idea of punching Hara but instead decided to be Jessica’s crutch. However, the first thing she needed to do was face the problem.

Taeyeon caught the office building doors open where she was shocked to see Jessica leaving with Hara, “Wow...not discreet there...” When she saw the other girl lean in to kiss her wife, Taeyeon looked away for a bit. She didn’t want to see it.

Eventually she heard heals approaching so she leaned on her car that was in place of the car Taeyeon had towed away so Jessica and her could go home together. There was nothing but shock on Jessica’s face as she saw a very serious Taeyeon, “Get in.”

“Ah umm...”

Taeyeon opened the door for Jessica, “Just get in. Your car got towed and I am here to pick you up.”

Jessica had no words for what the girl must have witnessed a few minutes ago, “Look....”

“No. Don’t. We are going home.”

The couple entered the home in silence until Taeyeon turned to face Jessica, “I am having a shower. Just get changed for bed okay?”

The kiss started playing in Taeyeon’s mind the more the water cascaded across her body. It got to a point where Taeyeon couldn’t hold back her sobs and went to lean down in the corner of the shower. She really had no strength for herself and yet she still needed to give Jessica strength...Taeyeon was feeling so helpless that it just made her sob harder. She didn’t even hear Jessica calling for her and knocking on the door until she felt the embrace of another, “I am so sorry. So so sorry.”

Somehow, Taeyeon knew what Jessica was trying to convey to her, “Is it selfish for me to still want you?”

“I don’t deserve your love.”

“Yet here I am loving you like a fool.” Taeyeon continued to sob and shake.

“Tae...I still love you too, but I was a fool to think that I should share my love.”

Taeyeon couldn’t help but burry her face further in Jessica’s neck and held her unbelievably close, “Just tell me that you won’t leave me. I don’t think I could live without some of you in my life.”

The seconds it took for Jessica to answer were the longest Taeyeon ever experienced in her life, “Taeng...I can’t leave you. I would never leave you. I will end it. I will end it with Hara...because I still love a fool like you.”

Taeyeon looked up into Jessica’s eyes that were just as puffy and red as hers, “Why-why did you do this to me?”

“I don’t know...I was stupid. When Hara came back into my life again...it was unreal. She blinded me into feeling that old passion we once had together. Then I would come home to you and that passion turned into guilt. I loved her...but now I know that I love you more Taeng. I can’t see you hurting.”

“How can I trust you not to give into temptation again? Hara still works for you.”

Jessica reached up to turn off the shower and wrapped her wife in a towel, “Because I can hurt her and not feel bad about it. I don’t need her in my life but I need you.” Jessica started drying Taeyeon off, “I know I broke our trust, but we promised to always come back to each other. Taeyeon...here I am coming back to you. Only to you.”

Taeyeon opened her towel to let Jessica in so they could share more contact, “I don’t want only want you back...I want you to never stray away. What can I do to make sure you never stray away from me again? Is my love not enough?”

Jessica’s tears started flowing again, “How could you say your love was not enough?” The two stayed in silence some more in the tub just sharing the warmth of another and the towel they had around each other.

“Maybe I can make a huge post of us together and put it in your office?”

Jessica started laughing, “If that makes you feel better, I will do that but I want a matching one in your office too.”

“If I do that, I won’t come home. I will fall in love with my poster.”

The two stupid lovebirds started laughing, “You idiot you need to come home because I will always be here waiting for you from now on.”

Taeyeon smiled, “That is always what I wanted from the start.”

--------------------------

Like usual, Taeyeon came home to an empty house yet the air around her home seemed lighter although last night was very rough for her and her wife. Deciding on making Jessica’s favorite meal, Taeyeon pulled out the proper ingredients and went to work. So focused on the meal at hand, Taeyeon didn’t even hear the door open but jumped a bit when a pair of arms engulfed her from behind, “I am home.”

The sweet voice of her wife echoed in her head, “How was your day?”

Jessica sighed before kissing her wife’s jaw, “I took care of some dirty laundry so I could come home to you.”

A smile formed on the Taeyeon’s lips, “So no more late nights at work?”

Jessica turned her Taeyeon around so she could give her a long and loving kiss, “I hate eating reheated dinner alone so I should come home to the woman I love.”

Feeling like everything was back to normal, Taeyeon turned Jessica around so she could hold her and rub their noses together, “I love you.”

 “Of course I love you too.” Both knew there were issues to work on but for now they salvaged out a future together with new promises and never ending love.

~END~

Author's Note

So this was a much more full chapter I felt like...I like part II better haha! And I am sorry the ending didn't go as Knight_09 wanted...I think there are better ways to handle this issue.

Also...I finally got to listen to the new BTS song "I Need U" Firstly, loved the new song. Secondly,  I feel like it somewhat pertains to this half of the story.