Taeyeon was off near the park to take her usual morning walk with Zero when she saw a familiar face, ‘.’

The other woman recognized Taeyeon right away as well so there was no escape, “Taeyeon!”

Putting on her best smile, Taeyeon greeted her ex, “Jessica.”

Immediately, Jessica bent down and played with Zero who was happy to his friend that suddenly left, “Hi Zero. I didn’t forget about you.”

Taeyeon didn’t know why there was unsettling pit in her stomach. The breakup was mutual from what she remembered months earlier.

Jessica giggled a little more playing with Zero until she looked up at Taeyeon who was still silent, “How are doing?”

Folding her arms, Taeyeon stood there knowing her heart was aching, “Fine. You know the normal things.”

Jessica nodded, “I see. Still working on music?”

Taeyeon shrugged, “I’ve had a mental block. I still work at the café.”

“That’s a shame.” Just then another woman came running up and put her arms around Jessica, “Yuri…”

The tall tan woman looked at Taeyeon confused before turning back to Jessica, “Finished my run. Did you want to get something to eat?”

Jessica gave Yuri a nod, “Umm Yuri this is Taeyeon.”

Yuri seemed to know who Taeyeon was as her face soured a bit, “Oh hi, Kwon Yuri.”

Taeyeon knew who she was. This town had a pretty tight-knit gay community and gossip went around like wildfire. From the moment Jessica met Yuri, Taeyeon knew, “Hi. I am Jessica’s…umm friend.”

Jessica smiled, “Yes friend.”

Taeyeon didn’t know why that felt so sour hearing it from Jessica’s mouth but she knew the reality. She needed to move on too, “I ah should get going. Zero needs his exercise.”

Yuri smiled politely, “Nice meeting you Taeyeon.”

“Likewise.” Taeyeon wanted to turn and disappear but Jessica was quick to pull her into an heart shattering hug.

“It was good seeing you. We should catch up some time, okay?”

Taeyeon nodded and gave her ex a strange pat on the back, “Yea.”

Waving Taeyeon off, Jessica and Yuri wen their way and Taeyeon went hers. As if she was holding her breath the whole time, Taeyeon lost the strength in her legs. Collapsing to Zero’s level, the dog took advantage and gave his owner kisses, “Zero we both need to move on. Jessica isn’t ours anymore.”

As if the dog understood, he gave Taeyeon a pout saying he understood.

-----------------

It was a few weeks since she saw Jessica in the park and just a few days since Jessica started messaging her. Somehow this lighthearted texting and talking felt normal. It was like high school all over again when they were friends before the kissing started. So when Jessica asked to see her, Taeyeon didn’t hesitate to reply, “yes.”

The day Jessica was to come over, Taeyeon didn’t know why she felt oddly nervous. She searched online to find the perfect recipe to make for Jessica, bought her favorite drinks and make the house look perfect although Jessica has seen this place a complete mess before.

On cue, Zero barked as the doorbell rang. Giving her outfit one last look, Taeyeon smiled and let out a huge sigh of relief before getting the door. Like usual, Jessica greeted her with a hug, “thanks for having me over.”

Taeyeon held onto the hug a few second longer than necessary, “I made dinner.”

Jessica smiled brightly, “I miss your cooking. Yuri is good but I think you brainwashed me into liking your foods only.”

Taeyeon loved that ego boost over Yuri, “It is ready in like 10 minutes. Take a seat, I will get you something to drink.”

Jessica sat on the couch with Zero bouncing up to get rubbed. He seemed very happy to see her again too.

Taeyeon returned with two glasses, “Here you are princess.”

Jessica giggled, “Oh god…no. You know how much I hate that nickname.”

Taeyeon smirked, “I always thought it was cute.”

Jessica sipped her drink as she shook her head in disapproval, “All through high school…that nickname haunted me that I even thought of moving.”

“Really?” Taeyeon didn’t know this.

Jessica smiled, “Yes but I didn’t because I met you shortly after. Somehow that nickname became the least of my thoughts.”

Taeyeon blushed, “Glad you stayed too. I would have lost a good friend otherwise.”

“So music. Can I hear what you are working on?” Classic Jessica redirecting a conversation she wasn’t comfortable with.

Taeyeon got up knowing she couldn’t turn down Jessica’s request, “All my music feels dark. It might not be your taste.” Going over to the computer, Taeyeon played one of her newest recordings, “This isn’t finished yet but I like where it is going.”

I wander in the darkness without warmth

As if I’m swimming

Even when I reach my hand out

The emptiness inevitably returns

At the repeated wounds

I lock my room again, I withstand alone

The warmth I encountered in that moment

Tender graze of your hand that touches me through the gaps

Just then the music cut off, “I need to work on a chorus.”

Jessica was breathless, “That felt…heartbreaking.”

Taeyeon hummed, “It was just how I was feeling…”

Jessica bit her lip as if she knew what Taeyeon was referring to, “Although it is dark, it is still beautiful. I hope I get to hear the finished song someday.”

Taeyeon shrugged, “I don’t know when I will finish it. Music doesn’t feel the same right now.”

Jessica could feel the air getting tense, “Don’t force it. So the café, I thought you quit?”

Taeyeon laughed, “I needed money. If this album doesn’t get released, I need to make money somehow. Are you still working for that magazine?”

“Yes. It is going well. I just got a promotion.”

“Oh. That is great news. I know you really were working hard for that.”

Jessica nodded, “You always said I was working too late.”

Taeyeon sighed knowing that was one of the reasons they broke up. Luckily the timer went off cutting off the chance of them going back down memory lane.

“I should get that.”

Jessica watched as Taeyeon patted back to the kitchen. Naturally, she transferred the drinks to the table and sat at her usual spot. All of this seemed too familiar.

“Italian. Your favorite.” Taeyeon placed the giant bowl of noodles on the table, “Oh I have bread too.”

Jessica laughed at Taeyeon running back to the kitchen to bring more food out, “It smells amazing.”

Taeyeon placed the bread on the table and started dishing out the food, “I didn’t know if you wanted Korean or Italian but I thought you don’t get to eat this much. Korean food is everywhere.”

Giggling, Jessica loved the gesture, it wasn’t hard to remember why she fell in love with Taeyeon, “This is perfect.”

Taeyeon finally sat down, “I actually forgot how to make this…and you know finding the right cheese is so hard.”

Jessica dug into her food, “Omg…it is wonderful. Better than any restaurant.”

Taeyeon smiled, “I made extra for you to take home.”

Jessica could feel tears welling up in her eyes at the gesture, “Thank you.” She hated how much this was all too ing perfect but it was like living in a fantasy. There was no more Taeyeon and Jessica. No more meals after work, no more sharing music, no more laughs and kisses.

Both girls finished the meal in silence because the time for small talk was over. They both knew the life they had together was over and this illusion of being friends couldn’t happen.

Shortly after the meal was over, Jessica grabbed her purse and hung around the door, “Thanks for having me. And for the leftovers.”

“I don’t want you to starve.” Taeyeon leaned in and they had one last awkward hug before Taeyeon closed the door and let Jessica go once again.

Sighing, Taeyeon was happy that she could just shut the door like that, let Jessica go and not confess she might still be in love with her. Maybe she was going to be fine moving on.

Suddenly, a knock came at the door.

Taeyeon tilted her head wondering who it could be. She wasn’t expecting any other visitors that day. Looking through the peephole, she quickly unclasped the door, “Jessica? Did you forget something?”

Walking back into the apartment, Jessica placed her purse onto the counter, “Yes. I forgot my purse.”

Taeyeon raised her brow, “oh.”

Jessica met Taeyeon halfway into the kiss. Naturally, Taeyeon’s hands went under Jessica’s shirt and pulled it off. Smiling, Jessica pecked her lips several times before helping Taeyeon out of her shirt too. With her hands on Taeyeon’s hips and Taeyeon’s arms around Jessica’s neck, they toppled onto the couch in a heavy lip lock.

Taeyeon also knew she was fine not moving on. No one is perfect.

~END~