=Kyuhyun's POV=

"Annyeong, Yumi-ah...

How have you been? You've probably been really busy these days...

I'm sorry I haven't been able to tell you what I'm up to these past few weeks, the members are really busy preparing for our concert this month. Really excited for Super Show 8 coming up~

Have you been buying our albums? Kekeke~ Probably not. I don't even know if you still listen to our music, but I hope you do...

Time flew by really fast, huh? It's been...5 years...since you've left.

Jung Yumi...I miss you so much. 

Can't you come back already? I'm still waiting...

I love you. Goodnight, My Yumi."

I closed my journal as I laid down my bed to sleep.

I guess I'm pretty weird already, huh? I've noticed that I seem quite aloof these past few years.

I'm still joking with my hyungs, bullying them,if that's what the fans call it.

But when I'm all alone, I feel like I'm not the same person anymore.

Well, you all should've noticed, I actually keep a journal now. Kekeke~

Lame, right? But I guess this is my way of overcoming my sadness...whenever I remember Yumi.

A lot has changed since she left.

All of us, have actually entered the army, and it's just been 3 months since I've finished my service with Ryeowook-ssi.

Before entering the army...I've tried to look for Yumi.

Everytime we have vacation breaks, I've been going back and forth to Australia, with hopes of finding her there.

I guess I'm pretty desperate, though I still haven't seen her.

I haven't seen her...for 5 years already.

It's been 1,825 days..43,800 hours..2,628,000 minutes...and 157,680,000 seconds since Yumi has left.

How have I survived that? I don't even know. I guess I just kept on holding to that promise.

To her promise...of coming back to me.

My hyungs...they seem to have forgotten about her already.

Though I don't know if they purposely try to avoid talking about her or mentioning her whenever I'm around.

Siwon hyung seemed to be the only one who comfortably talks about her with me.

Siwon hyung...he frequently tells me that I should just wait.

That I should believe in Yumi, cause she's not one to keep false promises.

Cause she loves me...So much, as he puts it.

I wonder...if you still love me, Yumi.

Have you been thinking about me?

Sometimes, I just can't help but miss you.

I miss you so much that I think I'll go crazy.

Even though, sometimes I think that our memories...are slowly fading away.

I...don't want you to be erased from me.

I don't want you to be erased from my life.

I'm scared that it may happen...Yumi-ah.

Come back now...please.

Whenever I'm not doing something, I just look at your pictures.

I try to remember your sweet, pure scent.

Your soft gaze,

Your heartwarming smile.

Recently, I have been visiting your house...

Thinking that one day, you might be there to open the door for me, to walk with me like the old times.

Sometimes...I don't want to open my eyes. Cause by then, I have to wake up and see that you're not here with me anymore.

Do you hear me, Yumi? Or atleast feel my yearning.

If only I knew by then, that it would be this long until I could hug you, until I could kiss you again.

Until I could see you again.

I should've never let you go.

I should've never left you that day...in the stadium.

I should've held you forever in my arms.

Today I...close my eyes again and sleep, and wait another day for you to come back.

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"Alright everyone! Last practice and we'll wrap up. This is it, it's going to be the greatest show of our lives!" Teukie hyung excitedly stated as he clapped his hands for everyone to get ready for the last rehearsal.

We rehearsed another two hours of re-runs and dances for our performances tomorrow, it's going to be the start of our Super Show 8, world tour. We're going to be touring around 30 countries and 55 cities and the tour is expected to last for atmost 2 years.

"Assa! Okay guys, we're done!" Teukie hyung happily exclaimed.

"Yeaaahhh."

"Finally."

"I'm freaking tired, aish." 

The members all hurried up to the dressing rooms and got their bags to go home.

*sigh* Why don't I feel like going home yet?

"Kyuhyun-ah." Siwon hyung tapped my shoulder lightly.

"Oh, yes hyung. Why?"

"Wanna go out for some coffee?"

"Hmm, Arasso. I'll just get my things."

After a few minutes, Siwon hyung brought me to a private coffee house and we just sat there and talked about how excited we were for our concert, how things have been going on with his new movie, how everything seemed to be doing quite well for the group.

But I knew that Siwon hyung was just looking for the right timing to start talking about Yumi again.

"Kyuhyun-ah..."

"Mmm?"

"Uhm...So you still don't have any contact with Yumi-ssi?"

"Y-yes. Still nothing, hyung."

"Kyuhyun-ah...you know this right? If she's meant for you, she's meant for you. And if she really loves you, she'll keep her promise. She'll come back, I know she would."

"Arasso, hyung."

"Oh- Kyuhyun-ah, you're crying."

I touched my cheek and was surprised to feel something wet as my tears flew down unconsciously. 

Have I become this numb? I don't even feel anything anymore.

"It's okay to cry, Kyuhyunnie. I know how much you miss her, and I know how much you've been keeping all your feelings bottled up inside of you for the past 5 years."

I felt a familiar tinge of pain in my chest as everything seemed to flash back to me.

All my memories with Yumi, all the time we've spent together.

How much I've been dying inside of me without even realizing it, how much I've been trying to avoid feeling all this pain since she left, since she made that promise.

But...why am I crying?

"Hyung...I don't know anymore. I'm so scared...scared that she might have left me. Scared that she's not coming back. What if i'm waiting for something...that doesn't exist anymore?" I found myself uttering as I fought back the tears that I held all this time.

"Then...It's up to you Kyuhyun-ah. You're the only one who would be able to tell yourself to stop or continue for this matter. You're the one who knows what exactly you need to do."

"I...I still love her hyung. I don't know what my life would be without loving her, without waiting for her, without her."

"Keep moving forward until you still can, and know your limit when you reach it. Just trust your feelings, dongsaeng. As long as you still have that love for her, that extraordinary feeling for her, you'd be able to wait, no matter how long it takes."

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"Yah everyone! Grab all your things, we're leaving in ten minutes!" Manager hyung stated.

"Arasso, hyung!" The members answered.

"Oh- Kyuhyun-ah, so you're taking the cab to the venue again, right?" 

"Yes, hyung."

For the past Super shows...that have gone by without her. I've been taking the cab for going to the concert venue, maybe with the hope of...finding her.

I've been living in the past, and I'm stuck there.

And it seems like I don't know where to go from here.

I don't know how to move forward without you, Jung Yumi.

I don't even know what my life had been before you became a part of it.

Like everything was erased, like my whole life started only when you came along.

I'm hopeless, Yumi.

I'm hopeless...

Droplets of rain started pouring down the roof of the cab I was in.

The loud thunder roared as the rain poured down heavier and heavier by the moment.

This is just like what happened then, Yumi.

But...I guess i'm not seeing you running in the streets today.

-------------

"Thank you everyone! Thank you guys so much for waiting for us...Thank you! Xie Xie! Arigato!" Teukie hyung exclaimed as he cried while waving to ELFs.

"Bye everyone! Take care! have a goodnight!" I waved as I was the one to speak lastly and we finally took our bow of appreciation for the fans.

"We are Super Juni-or~!" 

"We are ELF-oeyo~!"

We started to go around the stage and waved our final goodbyes to our precious ELFs.

Around this time...was the moment I saw Yumi, right?

When she hit me with that Siwon lightstick.

Section 13, I remember.

I tried to have as much eye contact as possible with our fans, with the tint of hope that Yumi might be somewhere lying in there.

I'm living in my dreams again, 

You have to stop this, Cho Kyuhyun.

All of a sudden,

A lightstick flew by and hit my head.

*sigh* Am I hallucinating?

I kneeled down and picked up the lightstick on the floor,

I picked it up and read the name written on the blue lightstick, 

Kyuhyun.

"Oh- That's mine."

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