Characters. GOT7
Status. Completed
Description.

bereavement noun
/ bɪˈriv mənt /

1. a state of intense grief
2. a period of mourning after a loss, especially the death of a loved one
3. deprivation or loss by force
 

The story title is very fitting to the story. Although it’s just one word, the word itself holds so much meaning that it grabs any potential readers’ attention. I wouldn’t say this word is used a lot as titles (or in general), so it has an effect on the readers that makes them want to read and find out what the word means.
 

Your description (if you can call it a description) is the dictionary definition of the word ‘bereavement’, which I really like. Not only does it tell your readers what that word means (as I said earlier, not a lot of people use this word in general writing), it also tells your readers what the story is about. This description is very simple yet effective, well done!

Your tags seem fine to me too!
 

You went for the bare minimum display for your story, which I think is a good thing, considering the theme of the plot.
 

For someone who doesn’t quite know GOT7, I think you’ve done a good job in portraying each and every single one of them. You’ve written about all of them in some length and you’ve dug deep into their thoughts, feelings and emotions. All of your characters are well developed, and you’ve shown that to your readers by the depth of feelings you’ve written for them. Personally, grief is one of the many emotions that are difficult to write, but I think you’ve shown the members’ grief quite well in this story, so a huge well done to you!

However, one thing I didn’t quite understand after reading the story is: why didn’t Youngjae get a full section like the other members?
 

This plot is absolutely heartbreaking (how can you kill off Mark?). This story takes a rather different approach to someone’s death, and I’m not too sure if I love this approach or not, but either way you’ve done a good job in coming up with this storyline. Sadly, things like this do happen in real life and I think the way you’ve incorporated it into this story is quite different.

You’ve started the story with Mark’s story, and then you’ve moved onto the reactions of the other members, and then ended with an epilogue. Throughout the story, you’ve embedded the reason as to why Mark died, and what had happened prior to that. You’ve given your readers enough background during the story so they’re not confused, and the way you’ve ended the story gave your readers a nice conclusion and closure to the whole thing.

About the of the story, I don’t think there was one in this story. You went on to talking about each member’s feelings but I don’t think there was a point where I thought “Ah, this is the of the story”. I guess Jinyoung’s part can be counted as the , since he was the closest to Mark, but even so I didn’t really get the feeling of reading the most important part of the story.
 

The flow of your story is consistent, but I think that’s because there isn’t so much of a story going on, since your story is more of a report on how the members deal with losing Mark. But, either way, it looks like you haven’t been rushing things or dragging things out in the story, which is good.
 

You did amazing in this department! There are no mistakes throughout your story!
 

Your writing style fits with the story well - it’s descriptive and metaphoric, which gives enough imagery to your readers so they can comprehend the feelings the characters are feeling. Though, I’m not too sure why you wrote the story in lapslock, but visually, it looks quite good with the story.
 

You definitely have no problems regarding the structure of your story. You’ve used paragraphs appropriately, so well done!
 

Your story’s statistics are a little on the low side, and there aren’t any comments yet so it’s hard to make any comments on that. However, you have a good start with the numbers and I’m sure they’ll go up soon since your story is still pretty new.

One thought - you made your story limited to subscribers only, but what if readers that don’t have an account or don’t want to subscribe want to read your story? This is a thought that I usually put out to those who have their stories limited to subscribers only because in a way, you are limiting the number of people who can read your story. Of course, this is only a thought of mine and therefore will not affect your score.
 

Since you didn’t say which member was lost, I flipped when I found out it was Mark! Marky boy, my bias in GOT7 is gone from the very beginning of the story! I was a little disappointed, but as I read the story, I realised that there was nothing to be disappointed about. I especially like how you’ve shown their feelings to the readers and how you portrayed each and every single one of them. The story is different in its own way, and I can say this story has given me a few more things to like about GOT7! Thank you for giving me this opportunity to read and review your story!
 

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