Minseok's POV

Is it her? Is it really her? Or did I just go bat crazy? He stared at her face, afraid to move, afraid to speak, thinking that if he does, she will go out in a cloud of smoke and leave him alone. Again.

„ Will you eat curry ramen with me?“ He heard her voice and shivers passed his body in response. If this really was a hallucination of his, this had to be the most random thing he could have imagined her say. She bit her lip and blinked quickly a couple of times before nodding at the cup of ramen in her hand.

„ It's funny, isn't it? Two months ago I threw it at you, wishing you would just leave me alone. Now I am standing here, asking you to share it with me. After all of this mess we put each other through, Kim Minseok I am asking you....will you please, eat it with me?“ Two months ago when he tried to rile her up, to get her to notice him by bothering her in the cafeteria, she threw it a him, starting a war between them. Starting a chaos that wrecked him. That wrecked her. But now.... suddenly she wants what? What does she want? And why now? Why at all? His heart beat picked up from her mere presence when he looked at her pale face, seeing insecurity on it as she waited for his response. He couldn't help but think that for the first time ever, she has willingly lowered her guard in front of him, uttering the word please, just like he did 2 weeks ago. It was so familiar and yet so strange. She took a deep breath and started walking to the end of the river bank, passing him on the way before sitting down on the ground putting the cup of the noodles next to her as she stared over the river in silence, waiting for him to make his decision. 

He finally managed to break out of his trance when she passed him and he felt his heart tighten in his chest for a moment, like a heart attack of sorts hit him, overwhelming him at the spot. He felt the instant yearning for her and he could only think of how much he missed her, her voice, her warmth, her smile. The relief in the knowledge that she was actually there soon got forgotten when he thought of how easily he would succumb to her, how easily he would give her everything at the drop of the hat, how much power she had over him. He started to feel frustrated at that thought, little sparks of anger directed at himself starting in his stomach. It would be so easy for him to run to her and embrace her, asking her not to leave again. But then again, that would be like willingly giving her a gun and drawing a mark on his chest,where his heart was and asking her to take another shot because the first bullet wasn't enough. I don't even know why she is here now. Don't just...don't risk being screwed over again, even if it's her. Especially if it's her. Distance. Self preservation. He walked over to where she was sitting and picked up the cup noticing a small smile of relief  appear on her face as she stared up front, eating in silence, not looking at him while he absorbed the sight he wasn't allowed to take in for weeks. I wish I could touch you. I wish I had the right.  But most of all....I wish I didn't want it so badly. He gripped the cup stronger not to succumb under the desire before he knew what she wanted. After all, their last conversation was pretty clear and the words she spit in his face were always with him, torturing him even in his sleep. I am done. I can't do this anymore. You are not good for me. He felt the frustration surge through his body again and he finally spoke for the first time that night.

„ Why?“ It was a simple question and yet the answer was so important to him. She put the cup of ramen down, not looking at him when she whispered.

„ It's really beatiful here. I understand why you chose this spot. The view is amazing.“ Not the answer he was looking for. Wait, how did she know where he was anyway? Nobody knew about this place except Luhan and.....Chen. I am going to murder him. Motherer.

„ Why are you here?“ He refused to give up on the question as he stared at her, the anger growing in him at her refusal to answer him directly. Why are you playing with me? Why don't you just tell me what you want so I can my wounds in peace? He watched her stand up and turn her back to him so he followed her motions, knocking down the ramen in the process of getting up, his next words sounding harsh and cold.

„ The last time we spoke you were pretty clear about our relationship. How broken and ed up we are. How you are tired of all this. How you want to be left alone. You asked me not to talk to you, not to approach you and I did just what you wanted. And now, after all of that, after you refused to listen to me, after you threw away everything we could have had..... you just show up here, asking me to eat ramen with you, like nothing happened. What kind of a sick game are you playing? Why are you playing it? Why now? Why at all?!“ She still didn't turn around and he couldn't resist yelling at her, frustration overwhelming him for a moment.

„ Damn it, Yeon Hee, why are you here?!“ She finally snapped and turned and he was astonished to see tears in her eyes, glistening at the dim light of the nearby lamp and the soft light of the moon and his knees almost grew week because she was the most beautiful sight he ever witnessed, like something out of a dream he was too afraid to have.

„ Because I love you, you pushy bastard!“ He stared at her, feeling like somebody just punched him in the gut. He couldn't even breathe properly as she hissed at him, willing the tears away, hitting her feet on the ground from frustration.

„ Damn it, that wasn't how I wanted to say it! I wanted to ease into it, not just scream it at you! But you just have to push my buttons.... God, this is a mess.“ He finally managed to unfreeze and the sneaky feeling of happiness started to wake in him but he chained those emotions, the instict of self preservation finally kicking in. He wants to believe it, so badly. And that's just what scares him. How much he wanted those words. But are they enough?

„ Love me? I thought you couldn't stand me.“ He said, barely keeping his voice even when he was dying to tell her that he loved her back, the words trying to roll off his tongue against his will. She crossed her arms and looked at him with her chin held high and a calm expression on her face.

„ You thought right. Still doesn't change the fact that I love you.“ That's the Yeon Hee he knows.

„ You are, hands down, the most charming girl I've ever met.“  He said, his voice dripping with sarcasm at the approach she took in confessing her love to him. She flinched at the word her used, making him narrow his eyes in suspicion. She then proceeded to shake her head and stare up at the sky for a moment before speaking again, biting her lip when she did.

„ I am sorry.“ What?

„ What did you just say?“ She looked him straight in the eye with guilt obvious on her face when she continued, her voice being stronger now.

„ I am sorry Minseok. For everything I did to you. For the things I said to you all this time. For not wanting to listen to you weeks ago. For shutting you out. For not giving you a chance to explain yourself. For not trusting you. I am so ing sorry.“ She was apologizing? To him? God, she was making his heart twist and jump in his chest. But then again...she had so much power over him. She could crush it, never to be jumping again. Self preservation, Minseok. Don't fall for it so easily. He won't be able to survive getting burned by her again.

„ Why would you even ask for my forgiveness? Am I not a douchebag? A jackass? A bastard? A sneaky low life son of a ? An arrogant self absorbed ? An egotistical jerk? A bad guy? A boy who thinks he is worth more than he is when he is worth nothing? A...“

„ I get it! I ing get it!“ She yelled while clenching her fists.

„ I am sorry for calling you all that. I just didn't...didn't see you the way you are. I didn't want to see you.“ I know. That's what hurts me the most.

„ I showed you things about me I never showed anyone. I told you things I never told anyone. I let you in.... and you ing threw it all away. You hurt me, Yeon Hee. So bad.“ (a/n: I really, really love Hurt by EXO. LOVE IT.) The confession just froze the air between them, making her blink a couple of times like she was surprised by his honesty.

„ I didn't want to hurt you. I just...I just tried to protect myself.“ She whispered, her voice slightly cracking when she did. He nodded, his next words laced with bitterness.

„ Protect yourself. I see. You know.....one of the reasons why I fell in love with you was because I thought of you as someone so different from my mother. Someone strong, brilliant, brave, someone who will never back away from something. I was wrong. You are just like her. A spoiled, selfish child who thinks only about herself.“

„ Don't you ing dare comparing me to her! I am nothing like her!“

„ Really? Because you did exactly what she did. Made me love you only to have you rip out my heart later. At least I was a naive, stupid kid when she did it. This time, I was a grown man and I still fell for you, I was willing to trust you not to do such a thing. Funny isn't it? Somehow it seems I just can't escape that fate.“

„ I WAS TERRIFIED! I was terrified of what you did to me, of what you could have done to me in the future!“ She yelled at him, blushing from anger and he felt some sick pleasure seeing her so human after she had been an icy demon for so long.

 „ AND I WASN'T? Like loving you is a ing walk in the park?! Do you think I wanted this?! Do you think I wanted to fall in love with someone as complicated and scary as you?!!“ He finally cracked as he yelled back, breathing rapidly. TRUTH. Finally after all this time, they were telling the truth to each other.

„ You regret it then? Loving me?“ She asked, not looking away from his face.

„ Like you don't regret loving me? After all, I am not good enough for you, isn't that right?“ Her jaw dropped as she approached him, a new emotion starting to glisten in her eyes.

„ Good enough? What are you talking about?!“

„ You said it yourself, I am not good enough for you.“ He said, the anger he felt slowly going away and draining him in the process.

„ Are you ing stupid? What's wrong with you?! I said you weren't good for me because you made my mind go crazy and made my heart ache and turned my life upside down. I ING never said that you weren't good enough and I will punch you again if you ever say something idiotic like that again!“ His heart started to beat even more wildly in his chest but he refused to let his guard down again, even if she was making it practically impossible by now. Confessing to him, apologizing, now trying to tell him he was good enough....he was slipping, barely holding on for dear life. Barely holding on from falling into the abyss again, from feeling hope again.

„ But it's true. I am not good enough. I have so many scars in me, Yeon Hee. I am truly ed  up in the mind..... in the heart. You wouldn't be able to handle that.“ She shook her head in disbelief, wide open as she trembled in front of him, trembled out of anger?

„ Did you hit your head somewhere in the last two weeks?! I don't care about how ed up you think you are! I can only love unconditionally, I can't pick and choose which parts of you to love. And I wouldn't want to love you any other way. I love all of you, jackass! The one with scars and a ed up childhood, the one who is an arrogant douchebag, the cold one who shuts me out when he feels threatened, the one who dated way too many girls....I love that Minseok just as much as I love the kind funny one who helped me through my claustrophobia, who was insanely jealous at everybody who approached me, who was so protective of me that he would knock a guy out for calling me a , the one who shared his coffee with me, the one who told me his most private thoughts, the one who made me laugh with erted jokes and comments, the one who read my mind so easily, the one who did everything in his power to be there for me when I needed him, even if I didn't want him there!  God knows you are a douchebag who makes me furious most of the time, but you are also the most special person I've ever met and even if I tried to convince myself to regret all of this, all that happened between us last two months....I just can't. I don't. I won't. You made me feel so much, you made me more human, you made me look forward to finally having someone to challenge and tease me, you made my life so much more complicated and yet I would repeat it all in a heart beat, OK?! Because you made me happy even if I would never admit it out loud before now. I can't even believe you would ever think you are not good enough for me when in reality, you are perfect for me. Even if you don't want anything to do with me after all of this, I need you to know that, I need you to believe that. No scars, no prejudice, no fear, no pride...nothing can change that fact in the end. You are perfect for me, Kim Minseok. You're my only once.“ She finally sighed after her monologue, covering up her eyes for a moment while trying to collect herself as he stood frozen in that place and all of his walls came crashing down, making him finally allowing himself to feel everything. GOD, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. I am never letting you go again. He almost ran to her right then and there but not before he spoke with amusement obvious in his voice.

„ I thought you hated confessions of love. This one was really cheesy.“ She rolled her eyes and turned to the river, hissing her next words.

„ God, I ing hate you.“ He laughed at her comment before responding in a teasing voice.

„ I ing hate you too.“ He looked at the same direction as her, admiring the view which now seemed even more gorgeous when he had her by his side.

„ So, what now? What are we going to do now?“ She asked, still not looking back at him. He sighed and rustled his hair as he nonchalantly responded.

„ Isn't it obvious? We are going to date and try to not kill each other in the process.“ She turned around,and he could see surprise on her face, soon replaced by traces of hope.

„ That doesn't sound very reasonable.“

„ Good thing neither of us is a very reasonable person taking into consideration who we fell in love with.“

„ Please, like falling in love with me wasn't the smartest thing you ever did, your Majesty.“ True.

„ Right back at you, demon. So, what do you say? You want to go on dates with me, celebrate Valentine's day together, have matching couple items, be one of those annoying couples with embarassing pet names, all in all do that lovey dovey thing with me?“ She scoffed, acting like she was nauseous at his words.

„ That's so cringeworthy.“ OK, time to take a different approach.

„ Fine. Do you want a y as hell jackass to be your boyfriend?“ He raised his eyebrows, wiggling them playfully at her, making her sigh and roll her eyes.

„ God give me strength.“

„ Is that a yes?“ She shrugged her shoulders, not answering for a moment. And then, all of a sudden she was running towards him, practically jumping on him.

„ yes.“ She whispered in his ear when he picked her up from the ground, pressing her into him as she wrapped her arms around him so tightly he couldn't breathe. He gently passed his lips over her cheek, enjoying the softness of her skin.

„ I've missed you so much....“ He whispered in her skin, inhaling the familiar scent of vanilla he had been yearning for. She smiled teasingly before winking at him, passing her fingers through his hair.

„ I know. I am pretty damn amazing.“ He chuckled before leaning closer to her and kissing her deeply, with no restraints what so ever, only desire and want and love between them. Her soft warm body pressed up against his, her hands tugging on his hair as she pulled him closer, wanting more of him, just like he wanted more of her. The kiss was heated and breathtaking and he felt dizziness in his mind and body as he passed his hand down her back, enoying the reaction she had at his touch, slight shivers running through her body. It was impossible to see where one of them started and the other one ended