RECAP

Dear Soojung,

640 days after you left.

I thought I was back to normal. But when I realize your birthday is coming, I couldn’t help but think of you again. Days like these were hard… I was suffocating from those frequent greeting and words you would say to me in the past… But when I recall my actions, how I hurt you, I realized that, maybe this is my punishment… Just one night, that violent night, the stars light up the sky and the moon shined brightly, but you left to walk down your path, your own path, which doesnt consist of me…Now as I look out of the window, nothing have changed, the night sky is still covered with stars, the moon is still there shining brightly at me but the only thing that changed is you and I…I will always be here for you, but you will never ever come back again… Because being by my side is what made you lost your smile, sometimes, even I myself felt that leaving may be a better choice for you…And I will try to think that way if leaving means you will be smiling more…

Chapter 23 - I miss you, do you?

When the second winter came, she learnt how to use work to dance away her sad memories and past. She changed into a better person who is now able to protect herself and the people around her.

On the other hand, he continues to work while suffering from his memories and past. He matures as he indulged his full attention into work as he took up his father’s company, something that he never thought he would have done.

Dear Soojung,

760 days after you left.

Recently, I went out with Myungsoo and had a few cups with him. I didn’t know I would get drunk. Whenever I got drunk, I kept on  thinking about you and it wears me out. Today, again, I walked alone on this empty street. Once in a while, thinking I might bump into you on the street but when I realized you are not even in Korea, I can only laugh at my pathetic state. The one who drove you away, yet I am hurting like hell here. I should be worried about myself, whether I can continue to cope with you not being by my side and yet I am worried about you. You aren’t sick, are you? You are taking care of yourself arent you? You are happy aren’t you? Though you must be happy, I will still pray for you.

Dear Soojung,

820 days after you left.

I am no longer crying these days, although I wanted to but tears won’t come. Today, I went back to SM University for the first time after I took over Lee Corp. I thought I would be okay, but I guess it was a mistake. The moment I stepped into the dance studio, you appear. I saw you standing in front of the mirror. I saw you smiling at me. Although I know everything was my hallucination, but I thought that once in a while should be alright, because your smile gives me strength to move on, whether it is my hallucination or not, so long as it is you. As I on some music and started grooving with the music, I realized your voice, your presence… everything about you is still here and I can only say I missed you and I don’t want to say goodbye yet, at least not yet.

Dear Soojung,

880 days after you left.

Still, as usual, no news from you at all… Everyone is asking about you and I find it so hard to keep everything to myself. Sometimes I felt like just telling them that it is me, I am the culprit that drove you away. But I kept it in because I know if it is you, you wouldn’t want anyone to know what happen. Because there is no news of you at all, I can only wonder, where are you right now? What are you doing right now? How are you doing? Do you think of me once in a while? Maybe, just maybe… Are you longing for me like how I do for you? So many questions, unanswered…

Still, I will be waiting…

Her new life in the states has turned to the third winter. Her career in the states became stable and she has become one of the most well-known dancers in the states and yet, is she happy?

Dear Soojung,

1000 days after you left.

I lied on the bed and fidgeted throughout the night. Sighs and sighs kept escaping from my mouth and weighing me down. They won’t let me sleep. I tell my empty heart that it is a fool, why can’t I cry even when I am in pain? When I thought of you, sometimes I think about what you may be thinking at this same moment. But when I recalled how I have hurt you that night, you might be thinking otherwise. To you, the memories of loving me may be difficult and painful. But the thought that you are going to let go this love one by one hurts my heart a lot. Sometimes, I became so desperate that I wished i can rewind everything. Rewind to the times when we were young where you hated me, those days were beautiful compared to now. Sometimes, I felt that if giving up everything could win you back, I had done it. But the problem is,

Nothing could win you back…

Dear Soojung,

1060 days after you left.

Today, I attended Myungsoo and Yoonah’s graduation ceremony. How time flies… It has already three years since you left Instead of putting our memories behind, I am missing them even more. If its not because of me, you will be standing on the stage wearing thegraduation hat and representing the dance school to read your graduation words. And I would be so proud of you, everyone would be so proud of you. But you are not here, and it is because of me. Why are my days filled with sighs? Why are my breaths getting rougher? Why does it seem like everything and everyone around me is changing and moving ahead except me who lost you?

Dear Soojung,

1120 days after you left.

Another nightmare on a cold night…I remember chasing after you in my dream. I was extending my hand, I extended it with all my strength but still, I couldnt reach you. I didn’t give up. I swear I saw your familiar back view. It seemed like I have gotten closer to you so, with a fluttering heart, I called you. But there is no answer…I tried calling again and this time, even your back view disappeared and that was when I realized, I can never reach you, whether it is in my dream or in reality. Either one, you and I will always be this far apart.

He brought the company to a whole new level, attracting tons of investors, earning huge profits, becoming one of the youngest CEO in the shortest timeframe but, is he happy?

Dear Soojung,

1240 day