I know I’ve been asking for this all this time, but I didn’t know I’d feel this awkward to be in front of him again. To think that we haven’t had a personal interaction in almost a month… I couldn’t really say if I can just act that familiar with him again. I mean, what if something changed? What if I say or do something stupid?

“Aren’t you going to leave with him?” Yixing nudged my side, making me pull away from my own thoughts.

I looked at him and pursed my lips as I mentally sent him my vibes. But as if he knew that I was asking for help from him to either take me away or come with us, he only shook his head to me and grinned widely in response. I sighed as I fiddled with my fingers and gazed at Jongin who was standing about five feet away from me from time to time. He was staring at the road ahead of us, obviously not pleased that I’m taking my time to decide whether to go with him or not.

“You’ve been rattling all sorts of things about him to me, and yet you’re still hesitating to come with him?” He stifled a laugh as he eyed me meaningfully. I bit my lower lip and looked down helplessly as I felt a bit annoyed that Yixing was making fun of me.

“Just go.” I heard him say.

I looked up to him and he only gave me a kind smile before suddenly pushing me towards Jongin. I was in a state of panic when he did that, that I kept flailing my arms as I tried to stop him from pushing me. But then, it was sooner than expected when I was suddenly shoved into Jongin’s hold—poor boy has to see me being mistreated by my friend whom I thought was the nicest in our group. He looked more than anxious to see me in front of him as he steadied me by holding my arms.

“Hold on to her tight. That girl will probably try to escape from you if you don’t.” Yixing uttered out. I was only staring at Jongin’s face at the moment, that I saw how his face scrunched upon the other’s words. I don’t know what was running in his mind, but just by his expression, I know that he wasn’t pleased to hear that from my friend.

“You don’t really have to tell me what to do.” He utters out with a serious voice, “But thanks.”

Yixing chuckled again, “Well then, I’ll be going now.” I heard him say.

And in that instant, I pulled away from Jongin’s hold and spun around to face Yixing. He had already turned himself around when I called him. He stopped upon hearing my voice, but he didn’t turn back or anything to face me so I just spoke as I assumed he was listening. “Thank you for everything Yixing! I owe you a lot! And oh, make sure everyone gets a share with the take outs we bought.” He raised an okay sign to me as a response.

“And,” I cleared my throat as I remembered what I asked of Sehun, “Make sure to come to my house tomorrow with the rest!”

“Arasso!” He responded, “Message me if you’re going back and you need a ride.” He uttered out again before finally resuming his walk.

“Oh!” I remembered, “Please tell Luhan to rest!” I shouted out since he was already a distance away from us. He didn’t say anything to that, but when he waved his hand goodbye to us without looking back I knew he heard me.

I sighed in relief and smiled as I watch him disappear in the distance. He is truthfully a great friend. And I wouldn’t be any more thankful for all that he had told me before, and for all the kindness he showed me. I wouldn’t be able to decide on my own if he hadn’t said anything. But nothing would probably change either if Jongin didn’t show up. Anyway, now that I remember, how did he even know where I was? Was he a psychic? Did he have a tracker on me? Was he just fortunate to spot me? Or did he follow me?

“Are you just going to stand there the whole day?” I heard him ask mockingly.

I turned around when I remembered how he was just behind me, watching us. I looked at him shyly when I saw how upset he was for some reason as he coldly stared at me. I didn’t know what I did wrong other than the things I did before… so I don’t really know whether he’s like this because of that or something more.

“I’m sorry.” I muttered out, but he didn’t say anything so I just looked down in shame. How can I even have the guts to look at him in the eyes again after all that I had done to him? Silly move!

“Is that all you have to say to me?” He asked as he peered down at me, a serious look on his face as I directed my gaze at him.

I frantically shook my head in front of him and pouted. “No.”

“Good.” He just said before whirling around, hands in his pockets, and then starts on his tracks. I immediately caught up to him as I felt like he had no intentions of pulling me along with him like before.

This is all what I deserve after all so why do I feel a bit disappointed that he’s now suddenly giving me a cold shoulder?

I frowned. This is not what I want for our fateful meeting to be. I never said I did not ever expect this to happen, but now that we’re on it, I still feel a little upset. Jongin never gave me the cold shoulder before when we started our relationship, and now that he’s actually doing it to me felt so unnerving.

Looking down on my feet, I just decided to get myself distracted by my steps. I watched how I paced on the side walk, trying to get myself interested on my sneakers I have been wearing. But how stupid I was to think that would work. So I just stopped in my tracks and sighed. This is so exhausting. Just thinking and feeling is already exhausting.

Should I just escape before he even recognizes I’m already gone? But that will probably make him even mad at me. How stupid can I even get? I just think rashly like always that I often hurt someone.

“Why are you only standing there?” I heard someone say, as another pair of feet stopped in front of me. I looked up and stared at Jongin, dumbfounded. His forehead was full with creases, his brows were furiously furrowed, and his lips were in a deep frown as he gazed at me, annoyed.

“I—“ But before I could even say anything to him, he had already woven his hand to mine. He gently tugged on it as he started pulling me with him, walking through the crowd as if he was making sure not to leave me behind again, so he wouldn’t lose me.

At that point, I secretly smiled, knowing that this is all that I am asking to happen. For me to feel his warm touch. To hold him. To see him. To be near him all the time. I squeezed his hand as I wanted to return the warmth he was giving me, and he turned his head to me when he felt it. He wasn’t smiling or anything, but just seeing his eyes look straight at me like that, I already felt happy.

It was already sunset as I have noticed the warm orange hue the sky have already turned into. I didn’t know we’ve stayed longer in the restaurant that we happened to witness this time of the day, but I am more than glad that we killed time like that. Just staying in one place, breathing the same air, feeling relaxed with the other’s presence. This is so surreal that I feel like this moment is almost a dream.

“Where do you want to go?” I heard him ask.

I looked up to him and saw him with a calm face, that I just chose to be truthful and a bit blunt, “Anywhere… as long as I am with you.”

He jerked his head to my direction when he heard me say that, and I instantly looked away to avoid meeting his scrutinizing gaze, but when I felt like he wasn’t looking at me anymore, I trailed back my gaze at him and saw how a ghostly smile crept up on his lips. He was obviously pleased.

I inwardly smiled at the thought of finally saying something right for the first time. Good job. You’re actually doing better than you have thought. Keep it up! I told that to myself as we were finally striding into what looks like our neighborhood. Just basing from how the houses look, I already thought that he was just going to drop me back to my own home, but then as we approach a different part of the neighborhood, I am not very much familiar with, I instinctively gazed at him. He peered down at me as if he knew what was running in my mind and he smiled.

“Don’t worry,” He uttered out, amused. “We’re just going to take a walk, but I won’t be sending you home yet. If that’s what you’re probably wondering about.” I sighed in relief as he answered the question at the back of my mind. This guy surely knows me best.

I held on tighter to his hand, a little bit possessively, as we continued our silent walk around the neighborhood. I was more than glad that he didn’t mind me doing that, because it made me feel less awkward towards him. In fact it made me relax. Just being with him like this calms me even if he doesn’t say anything. It’s fine. As long as we are okay. We managed to go more lefts and rights as our steady walk continued, it was tiring, physically, but I never complained because I felt like I wasn’t in the position to. I controlled my breathing for him not to notice what I was feeling, and wiped the sweat that was forming on my free hand to the side of my jeans to keep him oblivious.

“I think we should rest a bit.” He told me, as if he knew what I was trying to hide from him. But I only nodded to his statement, still pretending that I was just fine.

“You should say it when you are tired.” I flinched when I heard him say that as we trudged going to the playground where swings, seesaws, slides, and monkey bars have been placed for kids to play at. He sure knows me too well. I don’t get it how he does it, but I feel happy to know that he can read my mind or my actions like that so well, even if it’s too creepy for my own liking.

He chortled when he noticed me look so flustered upon hearing him speak, but I didn’t feel mocked. He was just probably happy. And I was the same, even if I was embarrassed. We reached the swings, and he asked me to sit on one as he took the other swing next to the one he offered to me. I complied quietly, sitting on the swing as cautiously as possible. I held on to the cold chain holding it connected to the bar that makes it float a few feet from the dusty ground and I starte