It took a while for the boys to fit in the van that Sehun had called for from over their mansion. A chauffer had been sitting in the driver's seat all the while waiting for an order to speed away.

"We're really grateful you let us stay over for over 4 days. It has been a while since the last time we've had so much fun so thank you." Kyungsoo beamed with a grateful smile gracing his lips as he placed a hand on my shoulder.

Assuring him that I harbored the same feelings—gratefulness for being accompanied through the lonely days, I squeezed his hand on my shoulder and heaved a small smile. "It was unexpected but I had fun too. Just next time if you guys want to come over don't surprise me." I said it in a way sarcastic, and rolled my eyes. Even so, I meant it that they can come again.

"My friends will always be welcome in our humble home." I added, letting my eyes smile for me.

"Wow! Now, that makes me want to tear up." Tao mockingly says as he was seated by the opened car door, and then he pretends to sob, earning him a hard knock on his head from Sehun.

Sehun gets out of the car, past Tao—even though he was cursing at the older boy (Sehun that is~) he just got ignored, which made both Kyungsoo & I to chortle. 

Sehun though was oblivious of the fact that he had just annoyed Tao for making him seem like an invisible entity, and proceeded to giving me a brotherly hug, opting me to be the one aware how the fierce-looking-panda-eyes, Tao, kept mouthing curses mainly for the guy who was engulfing me in his embrace.

I released a hearty chuckle at the sight of a cute annoyed looking Tao, making Sehun to abruptly pull away from me out of curiosity. He raised a brow at me as if asking whether something was funny but I just shook my head whilst letting a playful smile etch on my lips.

"Right." He reluctantly says, seeing how teasing was my smile, but he just probably decided to let it pass since he seem not the kind of guy to fuss so much over trivial matters.

Giving me a pat on my head and a warm smile, I guess Sehun knew those were the two things I needed right now. "Don't worry so much about Kai, alright? He phoned me last night and he said he's fine. I'll call you if I get a hold of him again." He told me, with a rather small voice, since for some reason Sehun had been the only one Kai had reached out to. Not even one of the other boys knew about his real whereabouts or the phone call. Even when we had touched the topic about Kai, they just shrugged it off right away saying that said boy is typically disappearing somewhere from time to time.

So, this not just the first time he hasn't come home or showed himself up? I wonder where does he even go to...

"Nana, you're at it again." Sehun said, putting a hand on my shoulder as I was in a daze again thinking about Kai even if I promised myself not to, anymore.

It's just that I'm worried. And it's not like I can easily forget someone in a day. Well, things just don't work like that. So to say, 'it will take time' for me to pass the stage where I still care for Kai and when I do still feel the emptiness his harsh words and his absence has left me.

 Sometimes, it's like that for every people, no?—when you'd get used to someone being there all the time, you would easily notice him not being in the crowd, because you had never gotten used to him not appearing in front of you and not merely being there for whatever reason; whether it's love or plainly his daily quirks of simply being there. The absence would eventually get to you, and you will find yourself pondering about that person from time to time even for the most unimportant reasons. Until curiosity becomes your obsession, and obsession turns to longing, sadness... emptiness. Maybe, it's the fact that, because you have unconsciously let that person take a piece of your heart, with the others being possessed by other people dear to you, that you are left with nothing but the 'emptiness'.

I squeezed my hands on my sides as I feel myself to blame for his absence. "If I haven't asked him things and angered him... then perhaps he's just here." My voice was obviously sullen, as much as I want to mask it with a calmer tone.

Sehun probably noticed my hands, for the way he gently grabbed them, the way he looked into my eyes, it all screamed of silent reassurance. "I know Kai better than anyone else. He won't simply blame anyone for something so measly. He may be a prick but he's not that bad to hold you responsible for his absence. Maybe, the other guys are right about him being somewhere. He's often done that in the past so don't worry too much." I wish I can just simply believe him, but the fact that I nor them know where Kai is, I just can't. I can't even just sit still all the time. I had waited for him the past 2 days too, and yet he didn't show up even once. 

I bobbed my head though, to tell him or rather to stop Sehun from worrying about me. I just feel like it would be too much of me to ask more of him when he has Kai already to worry about. Who knows what more he has to worry for. Besides, since the day I confessed to him about what happened to me and Kai the day after it happened, he had been constantly calling him, pacing in the garden while waiting for Kai whilst gnawing on his lower lip like crazy, and been a good friend to remind me not to worry. I'd been as guilty as hell now for doing that. I should have just kept quiet... but probably if I didn't, what then would I have done?

"Okay." I told him, though Sehun didn't look very much convinced. He retreated back reluctantly going inside the car while I was waving at him with a forced smile to hide the worry that have been haunting me for the past days.

Baekhyun had just gotten out of my house when I had turned around to call for him. The boy looked at me with a sheepish smile plastered on his lips. He has been unusually livelier ever since I started talking to him properly again. Perhaps it just me? But then, he really did become somewhat his old self again—quirky and carefree though he was shy.

"Nana, don't forget tomorrow, ne?" He beamed with eyes that showed great expectations for a positive answer.

I smiled, being somewhat infected by his own smile, and bobbed my head. "Okay. See you at 10." I told him, not forgetting the fact that we still have a meeting tomorrow, as he had asked me last week.

He grinned widely and ruffled my hair like the usual. A way for him to show his affection towards me. I lowered my head, somewhat liking the way he was doing that to me, yet embarrassed to show him how pleased I was because of the little gesture.

Baekhyun pushed Tao playfully as he set his bag at the back of the van to where Chanyeol and Chen sat, and he waved at me before going in. 

Somewhere in the process of swallowing the fact that we have gotten better in our relationship as friends because of the days I spent with them in the house, I had Baekhyun second to everything about Kai in mind. It's just that, since having that confrontation with Soojung, I felt sorry for him because I quickly judged him before. I thought he's the baddest cheater, when in fact his girlfriend was the biggest lie. He knew it all along, and yet the boy I admired endured it. Maybe, he loved her too much that he didn't do anything—anything that could make him lose the love he has owed everything to. After that day, I made it a promise to fix things with him. I mean, letting him clear things between us, being the friend he needed, and putting closure to whatever that needs it.

"See you on Monday princess!" Tao mused when the car door was finally closed and he had just rolled down his window. 

I chuckled heartily, hearing the kind of endearment from this fellow just won't sink in my head. "Alright my prince." I played out.

A tinge of pink grew on his cheek as he gaped at me in disbelief and then called out to Baekhyun at the back. " dude, did you hear her say that?! She said I'm her prince! So what are you to her now?!" He chuckled teasingly as he pointed at the latter, but got whacked on the heard by Baek in the end.

"You better stop, or else I'll really kill you on the way. I wouldn't have second thoughts chopping you to pieces and then throwing your body off a cliff, Tao." I heard Baekhyun scoff, making the others laugh and pressure him to really do it even though it was just a form of their joke to play around.

Tao groaned and crossed his arms. "Baekhyun will be a murderer by the end of the day, so don't bother think about even marrying such a man! He's so scary right?!" He says with a child-like expression and then fakes cringing on his spot.

I just chortled at his childishness and did not speak. Just that, I'm not the person to talk a lot most of the time. Most often I just watch from the sideline or just yet listen to what others would say. A few jokes here and there, being tired of it, Sehun did the honors of bidding me a final goodbye since Tao & Baekhyun kept on bickering like a sick couple. They sped off and I waved until their van was nowhere in view.

I sighed when the happiness drained out of my body. And I went in wordlessly, still thinking of that person in particular—Kai. He has occupied 99.99% of my mind, so that shouldn't be explained. It just so happened that I am so stupid to still think of him. I know.

I sprawled on my bed when I finally reached my room. The house has been long dead silent the moment the boys stepped out, and it's just me now to relish the silence and loneliness. Out of all the days I had with them, I never once thought about looking forward to the day when I'd be alone again—this day, because a little by little I realized that I had liked the idea of having people around better than being alone. Being alone was nice. It's nice when you're just tired of the daily hassles and worries of life. You can use it to your advantage when you just want peace of mind. But getting used to it, after seeing bits of change in my relationship with people, I realized how unhealthy it was. The fact that you get cooped up, without someone to talk to, feels sickening. It can drive you insane how you can't live as much as an island can stand. It's just, probably that's human nature for us to be around people. No man is an island, anyway.

Shifting to my side, as I found my position on bed uncomfortable, I came face to face with the view of Kai's humble home from my window. The window I had the curtains tied to the sides to get a better view of the majestic mansion... or just to get a better view of the street where I always wish to spot him, but then not once did. The house screamed of luxury as always, and it didn't fail to amaze me every time I lay my eyes at it. 

But what the house never failed to remind me is Kai himself. It's just that, the fact that he lives across from me didn't help at all for me to stop from thinking about him. The want to see him grew more and more the longer I stared at the said structure, and the thoughts I have about him seemed to expand vastly every second I waited for him.

Waiting for him have been very frustrating for me and yet I never got tired of it. I just don't want to give up yet even if he seem not one bit at par with me for caring so much for him. I don't know. Maybe I am doing this because I'm guilty for angering him. Maybe too, I just want to see him again. Through the past days, I've grown a habit of caressing the pendant of the necklace he gave me while silently chanting a wish for him to come back. To come home even if he won't look at me again. I'm fine by it as long as he's somewhere I can easily see.

Call me dumb, stupid, selfish and the like, or a word to sum that all, if there is any, but I won't probably stop caring for Kai even if I will be leaving him one day. Even if the way I feel for him is one sided, unreciprocated, I will still hold on to him even if it causes me to feel empty. Because if there is one thing I realized while he is not here... 

... is the fact that I have probably already fallen for him before I even became aware of it.

The days I had it for myself, whenever I wait for him in my room alone, I realized that the fuzziness and warmness, the butterflies in my stomach, the h