“Are you sure he's alright? We might have to talk to him.” It is a whisper but I can clearly hear Taemin talking from my back with the members. I'm standing on the doorway and I don't even know why I'm there. I haven't eaten anything since I went home from the schedule this morning. It's already 11:30 pm.

I ignore them. I stare blankly at the empty space thinking about something i'm not sure of. Am I thinking of something? What am I thinking? I don't know. My mind is not with me right now.

“Hyung.” Someone pats my back. It turns out to be Minho. “Should we grab some meal today? You might be hungry or -”

“No, I'm fine.” I answer. “You go eat something, guys... and then go to bed. It's getting super late.” Despite the fact that I'm not with myself, I still manage to take care of them. That's something a leader and an older brother should always prioritize.

“Do you want someone you could talk to? We're four. You could talk to us at the same time, we promise to listen well.” Key walks beside Minho and tries shaking my shoulder in the most cheerful way. I force a smile. They know I'm faking it though.

“What will happen if I talk about it? Will she come back?” I look at them with tears about to fall into my eyes again. I cried really hard when I was in the car – I thought I won't be able to cry anymore. I turn my back on them and start facing the door instead. If they see me being like this, they'll start to feel depressed again. That I don't want to happen.

“You might want to tell us everything that happened starting from when the President talked to you.” Jonghyun and Taemin follow the two. I remember I haven't told them what happened. They don't know the whole story.

Despite feeling heavy and all. I still sit with them on the couch and tell them everything that have happened until when she left me. Now that she's not here, I feel like hell for telling the whole story. There is suddenly a deep cut in me. I don't know where it is so I don't know what to mend.

“So the president has figured out who she really is. Where her parents are and what jobs the do?” Minho asks to which I nod. “And he told you he also said the same thing to Myeon Hee when they talked the other day?” I nod again. “And he also said he gave Myeon Hee enough money to supply her needs for one year? That's really a lot then.”

After Minho's questions, there comes the silence. We aren't talking and all of us are staring on the blank space. I don't know. I can't think of anything right now but Myeon Hee's face. Her picture keeps on appearing in my mind and I want to pull it out from there to be with her again.

I look at each members.

Minho's rubbing his chin. He's thinking about something.

Taemin's eyes are wide and they are not blinking. He's contemplating on something as well.

Key's biting his lips switching from the upper to the bottom lip. A sign that something's troubling him.

Jonghyun's arms are crossed and he is tapping his fingers on his arm. That means he is not sure of what to do but really wants to know what will happen now. He's in panic, I suppose.

“She probably went back to the Philippines.” Minho says after a long silence in the house. “There's not place she could return to but her country – where she knows everything and every places she might want to go. She cannot live alone here because she doesn't know a thing... and I think she's scared to be caught because she has met the guy who threatened her life before again.”

“Where in the Philippines will she go?” Jonghyun asks Minho while frowning.

He nudges at him. “How would I know, pabo? I've been to Philippines once and we only went there for work. It's not like I toured around that country.”

“You should have an idea since you were the one who thought about that.”

“I'm not saying I know every details of the possible answer, stupid.” Minho says angrily and Jonghyun makes a face. Key elbows Jong and he stops.

“What are you going to do now, hyung?” Taemin asks.

“I don't know what to do. I just want her to come back to me... but how?” I look at them. They stare down at the floor. Even one of us can't figure out how to bring her back. There's not even a single hint of where she went.

Minho's right that she probably has flown back to the Philippines. I can follow her. I know where the Philippines is, but how can I find her when I get there? I don't even know a single street in the Philippines and yet I will find someone who I'm not even sure whether she's there or Minho's theory is wrong.

“You should ask the president the address in the Philippines.” Jonghyun suggests.

“You think he would tell him? Of course not!” Key barges in. “For now.. since we have no other clue of where she is, we should wait till she comes back. Who knows? She loves you a lot that I know she won't keep up of being away from you. Let's trust her. I know she'll be back one day.”

I hope so, Key. I really hope so.

“What if she doesn't come back?” Jonghyun asks.

“We don't need your negative argument Kim Jonghyun.” Minho answers and hits Jong's chest softly.

“We should sleep and try to feel better.” Taemin suggests and each of them pats my back and heads out to their own room – with dooped shoulders and heavy footsteps.

I know I should sleep and try feeling better... but it's not as simple as that. Who will feel good and okay if someone he really loves left after making you the happiest man in the world just the other day? It's unfair. So all those time that we were together doing everything we want, I was just the only one being truly happy. She wasn't that happy because she knew she's going to leave me anytime soon.

She's unfair. Her love for me is more than how I love her. It's unfair. I wasn't able to prove that I love her more because she's gone now. And what if she gets pregnant and she still doesn't come back? What about our child?

Why is she so unfair? She doesn't know how it pains me because she loves me so much that she's willing to leave me and carry the burden alone while I'm still on the safe side.

And she knows I will never leave SHINee... so I can't really find her if she gets further away.

But you're so unfair and cruel Myeon Hee. Fine... go leave and go super away... but you don't need to take my heart with you. You should've just bring it back to me before leaving. How am I supposed to feel okay if everything that I have.. I have given them to you?

A/N: I read a sweet funny fic last night so I wasn't able to give you another update. Here it is now. ^^ I'm thinking of pulling Onew out of the idol world if I ever start another fic in the future. I don't know.. I think I have to give Onew a different character like... the class president... the young business tycoon... or whatever. Don't know. I don't have a story in mind yet. >.<