"Can't sleep again?" Yong Guk asked as he finally found Yoon Mi in the library.

Shaking her head to agree with him "I don't know why I can't seem to fall asleep these days" Yoon Mi said as she leaned back in the seat.

"Why suddenly decide to go to the library instead of the studio like usual?" he asked while walking over to lean against the study table in front of the seat. 

Shrugging her shoulders, she was clueless to why she was doing certain things these days.  "Still, sitting out here won't solve anything. Unless you're intending to bore yourself with a book to the extent that you actually fall asleep" Yong Guk joked as he got off the study table.

Noticing her silence, he got slightly worried about her. Usually she would shake her head and laugh at his tacky and cold jokes but today she was completely silent.

“What’s wrong?” Yong Guk went over to her and placed his hand on her forehead.

Stunned by his sudden action, Yoon Mi looked up at him in shock and surprise. Slowly reaching up to pull his hand away, “I’m f-fine Yong Guk-ssi” she said quietly as a strange silence came between them.

"Are you able to tell me a story like you promised?" Yoon Mi said as she looked down, letting her fringe fall and hide most of her face. 

"If you're looking for a distraction, I doubt a sad story is ideal for that Yoon Mi" Yong Guk answered guessing her reason and intentions.

"It's not going to be a distraction Yong Guk-ssi, it just so happen that I remembered that you said that you would tell me your story another day" Yoon Mi answered trying to convince him.

"You're lying." he said quietly as he went to the armrest of the sofa chair. (something like the grand chairs we always see beside fireplaces in movies/shows)

"I'm not..." she murmured weakly.

"Why aren't you looking at me in the eye then?" Yong Guk said simply.

"I don't know" she brought her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. Resting her forehead against her knees, Yoon Mi took in shaky breaths as she tried to stop the thoughts in her mind from overwhelming her.  During the day where she had school to preoccupy her, it was easy to forget and force her emotions to take a back seat.

It was easier to pretend during the day... But recently, just when she thought that she was going to be fine, her memories flooded her during the night in a relentless torrent.

*Dae Hyun would somehow find me during my lowests and at my weakest...* Yoon Mi thought *Now, its Yong Guk is seeing me at my weakest state...how many more people have to see this pathetic side of me?* She chided herself for not being stronger than she expected herself to be.

"What's wrong?" Yong Guk said, his voice sounding awfully close to her.

Looking up from her knees, Yoon Mi saw a pair of dark chocolate coloured eyes looking back at her.  Blinking repeatedly as she tried to hold her tears back, Yoon Mi suddenly wished that Dae Hyun was here to heal away her migraine. To help her forget the pain...But it wasn't possible, they would most probably be in the next town or city by now.

"Tell me" He said gently, trying to get her to say what she was feeling. Shaking her head, she didn't feel like confiding in someone. *Not another person to be dependent on please...* she pleaded in her heart.

"You're afraid of getting too close to someone else, to become dependent." Yong Guk said, staring into her eyes. "You want to keep us at arm's length where you feel that you would be safe. So that it would be easier for you to disappear, that it would be easier for you to suffer alone"

*H-How does he always know my exact thoughts?* Yoon Mi shifted further into her seat, trying to move away from the pair of eyes that seemed to pierce through her soul.

"That's not the way to recover Yoon Mi, believe me. I tried" Yong Guk said, holding her hands and prying them away from her knees. "I see my past self in your eyes Yoon Mi. What you're doing is really painful to your heart."

Holding her shoulders gently, not wanting her to revert to her previous position, Yong Guk was literally holding her up.

 "I'll ask you again Yoon Mi, what's wrong?" He looked at her with utmost care in his eyes.

"I-I don't know" her voice wavered. "My heart hurts so much from remembering and my head feels like it’s going to split apart at times"

Voice breaking and tears falling, Yong Guk pulled her into his arms as she cried, making her rest against his shoulder.  "It's hard to be strong" he patted her back as she timidly clung to his shirt.

"I try so hard." she sobbed "Smiling, laughing and trying to be happy around everyone. But when I'm alone, everything comes haunting back and each time I cry harder when I see Ji Yong Oppa. 

His smile, his laughter, his fingertips against my skin...

Thinking of him hurts so much, loving him hurts so much more. What do I do Yong Guk-ssi?" she wailed as hot tears flowed out of her eyes, falling down her face and staining his shirt.

"Only time-"

"Time made me this way Yong Guk-ssi! Look at what time is doing to me? Isn't there any other way to forget this pain!" she yelled, raising her voice against him for the first time.

"I told you before Yoon Mi, you can never forget the pain. It only becomes bearable over time. It took me 10 years Yoon Mi; don't expect to be over the pain within weeks."

Putting an arm around her back and the other under her legs, Yong Guk effortlessly lifted her up.

"W-What are you doing?" Yoon Mi cried as she literally got carried away.

"Bringing you back to your room." He said easily with absolutely no strain in his voice. 

"I-I I can walk!" she squirmed in his arms. 

"And I can drop you down the flight of stairs I'm walking up right now" Yong Guk said seriously as he bounced her in his arms, causing her to wrap her arms around his neck.

Keeping quiet throughout the rest of the journey Yoon Mi couldn't t help but think how she felt safe in his arms.

Annyeong!!! :D

This is freshly written ~ I wrote this on my phone as I made my way back home after work XD *I'm really finding ways to write whenever I can >.<

yes, Dae Hyun is not around Yoon Mi for at least five months and as you guys call it 'daemi' activities are on hold XD *I have sooo much fun reading all of everyone's comments XD*

The rest of the guys will have more air time and there will be more interactions between the rest of the members ~

Young Jae and Jong Up are kinda being neglected here >.< And I'm feeling bad for them.

Boo yeah! 25 more days until my intership ends!!! I can smell freedom and it is close!

With love,

Violynn 30/05/2012