Home. There's nothing quite like the feeling of waking up without an alarm with your fiancé next to you, and your children sleeping peacefully in their own room.

 

Today... At last, was a lazy day. No chemo, that was yesterday. No doctors appointments, no photoshoots, no TV appearances, no concerts, no interviews.... Just a day at home with my little family.

 

Speaking of which... I should act like the mom I am.

 

I got out of bed quietly, simply slid on my robe and slippers, and glanced back at TOP. He was sleeping on his stomach, face facing away from me, his casted hand and arm abover his head on his pillow. His was partially exposed, and he was snoring softly. Good. He needs his sleep.

 

I walked out of our room and to the nursery. The twins were both fast asleep in their cribs, and I could tell this was the deepest sleep they'd had since we went to Korea. The twins knew this was their home. 

 

I was just about to step out, but I heard a soft coo, then a "ma-ma-ma-ma." I turned around to see Mina in her crib, holding onto the bars as she stood clumsily.

 

"Hey, baby girl!" I smiled as I exclaimed quietly. I walked over and picked her up out of her crib. "You wanna help Mama make breakfast?"

 

Mina smiled and giggled, bouncing up and down. I laughed quietly. "Come on, honey."

 

I carried her downstairs and set her down on the kitchen floor as I walked around and gathered supplies. Mina followed me, crawling wherever I went. 

 

I got the stove and griddle going, and I looked down at my soon to be one-year-old daughter. "How about some music, baby girl, huh?" I grabbed my iPod, plugged it into our iHome dock, and hit play. Big Bang's Love Song started playing, and Mina clapped while giggling.

 

I laughed as I started cracking eggs into a bowl. Come to think of it... I had never really cooked breakfast for TOP in the three and a half years I had known him. How weird was that?

 

I scrambled up the eggs, and as those were in the skillet, I made some pancakes on the griddle, bacon and sausage on another skillet on the stove, but on the back burner so the sizzling wouldn't hurt anyone.

 

I eventually felt Mina tug at my legs, then pull herself up and keep herself steady by holding my calve. She made a whining noise and looked up at me, and I knew it was because she wanted some attention.

 

"C'mere, princess." I sighed, picking her up. I balanced her on my hip as I flipped some pancakes. "Mommy's never made Appa breakfast before. How weird is that? It looks good, huh? But it's all organic."

 

Everything I had cooking was organic. The pancake mix was organic, the blueberries in the pancakes were from a farmers market, the eggs were fresh from a market, and the bacon and sausage were turkey. I wanted my kids growing up healthy, so that's what I intended to do with my whole family.

 

As things finished cooking, I heard footsteps coming into the kitchen. "Something smells amazing." TOP smirked, walking into the kitchen, Jae Sun o his hip. TOP now had his tank top and glasses on.

 

"Well, we're home, so I thought I'd cook am actual breakfast." I walked over and set Mina down in her high chair, TOP doing the same with Jae.

 

"Can't wait." TOP smirked. "Are we giving the twins anything?"

 

I nodded. "I want them to try a bit of everything."

 

I got two small plates out of the cupboard, and cute up tiny bits of pancake, egg, sausage, and bacon. I divided it amongst the two plates, and brought them over to the twins. I set the pink plate on Mina's high a hair and the blue on Jae Sun's as TOP made his own plate. I walked over to the fridge and took out a basket of strawberries and the cream for coffee.

 

"Do you want any sausage or bacon?" TOP asked, glancing over at me.

 

"Yeah, both, please. Not that much, though. I still feel a little sick." I said as I shut the fridge.

 

I set the strawberries and creamer on the table, and grabbed the jar of organic strawberry jelly AJ's grandma was famous for making. I set it on the table, too, and sat down next to TOP, by the twins. 

Mina had picked up a piece of pancake, looked at it, and put it in . She ate that and grabbed another piece immediately.

 

"Babe, where's the syrup?" TOP asked after he stood and looked in the cupboards. 

 

"That's what the jelly is for. It's organic."

 

"You're serious about that whole healthy eating thing, aren't you?" TOP sighed, coming back and sitting down. He reluctantly grabbed the jar.

 

"I want my kids to eat healthy, which means we are all eating healthy." I sat down and kept an eye on the twins.

 

I ate and drank my coffee slowly. I felt kind of sick, but I didn't want to show anything. I wanted to be okay today.

 

"This is really good, jagi." TOP smiled. He glanced at the twins. "I think Mina and Jae love it too."

 

I nodded and slowly set down my utensils. A huge wave of nausea washed over me, and I held my head.

 

"Are you okay, Natalia?" TOP asked, looking at me.

 

I slowly shook my head. The nausea got worse, so I got up and ran to the bathroom. I easily threw up my whole breakfast and yesterday's dinner. I sat down, against the wall, and took a deep breath. This all just .... I had one more week of chemo, but I swear I don't think I could last. I just-

 

Nausea took over me again, so I leaned over to throw up. All that came up was bile.

 

I flushed the toilet, rinsed my mouth, and brushed my teeth. At least I was staying home today.

 

I walked back into the kitchen, whee TOP had seemed to be waiting for me. He immediately looked at me. "That bad?"

 

I shook my head. "I'm fine. It's whatever. I'm... I'm just going to clean up the kitchen and then go shower. Maybe that'll make me feel better."

 

TOp stood as I walked towards the counter, and he stopped me. "Don't clean up the kitchen. I got it and the twins. Just go take a shower and relax okay?"

 

I looked at his casted hand. "You sure? That's gonna be some trouble."

 

TOP smirked. "I got you, baby. Now go. I'll shower when you're done."

 

I sighed and walked upstairs. I quickly showered, dressed in a pair of yoga pants and a hot pink American Eagle hoodie, and scrunched my hair. I just decided to not wear any makeup, and walked back downstairs.

 

TOP was taking the twins into the living room, so I took Jae from his casted arm. 

 

"What are their wardrobe plans?" TOp asked as he set Mina on the carpet.

 

"Just leave them in their pjs. We never do that to them. It's a lazy day." I shrugged, setting down Jae.

 

"I am going to go shower then." TOP sighed.

 

"Okay." I nodded.

 

He walked upstairs, and I groaned and laid down on the floor. The carpet was so squishy and nice.

 

Jae Sun squealed and crawled over to me, and Mina crawled over to their toy box and grabbed her Seungri plush, which was on top.

I shut my eyes for a second, and my phone rang. Without looking at the caller ID, I groaned and answered. "Hello?"

 

"Since when did you fail to tell me you were back in America and regret to inform your best guy friend?" AJ said on the other end.

 

"Hey Age." I sighed, rolling onto my stomach. 

 

"When did you get back?"

 

"Like four days ago. We've been really busy with everything."

 

"How's the chemo? Is it working?"

 

"I have two more sessions next week, and another appointment to see what happened the week after that. I feel fine, though."

 

"And Top's hand? How's that?"

 

"Fine. He should be getting the cast off in a few weeks."

 

"How are the twins?"

 

I groaned softly. Was this twenty questions? "Fine. They're standing on their own now. And they can say mama and Appa. And dada, but TOP prefers Appa."

 

"Wow. Did this all happen while you were in Korea?"

 

"It sure did. Did I miss anything interesting while I was gone?"

 

"Not really... It's been boring here."

 

"Duh. Nothing ever happens."

 

"So what do you guys had planned today?"

 

"Absolutely nothing." I sighed contently. "I'm literally laying on the floor as the twins crawl around as we speak."

 

AJ laughed. "Wow, Nat. Well.. I won't bother you guys then. If you need any help with anything just call."

 

"I will. Thanks AJ."

 

"No problem. Have fun."

 

"We will." I replied. We hung up.

Pretty soon TOP came back down stairs, dressed in a sweatshirt and sweats. He groaned and laid down next to me. I flopped onto my back and turned my head to look at him. He looked back at me, and I couldn't help but laugh.

 

"What?" TOP chuckled.

 

"Look at us! We have all these glamorous outfits and this designer furniture, yet here we are, laying on the carpet in sweatshirts and sweats!"

 

TOP chuckled. "Well, my wrist needed a rest from my diamond watch, I am sorry." He looked over at Mina and Jae, and grabbed them both and laid them in between us, they both had their Seungri and Bom dolls.

 

TOP lifted up his phone and held it over us for a picture. "Smile!"

 

I smiled, and TOP took It. He put it on twitter, and I sighed, and looked at my babies. "Why are they so gorgeous?" I exclaimed, pushing back Jae Sun's thick hair.

 

"Because I'm their father." TOP joked.

 

I scoffed, reached over, and pushed him. "I think you're gonna have some trouble fitting you head in the house."

 

TOP laughed. "And to think I'm getting married to you in a few months..."

 

"Oh yeah!" I exclaimed, sitting up. "I have my final fitting in a week!" I gasped and covered my mouth. "Oh no!"

 

"What?" TOP asked. He sat up as well.

 

"I have lost so much weight since my last fitting! Seunghyn... They're not going to fit!!" I felt my eyes clouding with tears. "Y-your mom and sister helped me pick out the dresses and now what if they don't fit? I'm not going to have a wedding dress!"

 

"Calm down, okay? Calm down." TOP said. "We'll fix this. They can fix this. If your dress is too big, they can take it in. Way in."

 

I groaned. "What if they can't? Then I have to choose new dresses."

 

"Then get new dresses." TOP shrugged. "You'll look beautiful in anything."

 

"But I won't have everyone with me! My mom can go because all teachers have to be in the buildig that day. Jiyong can't go because he's promoting his CD. 2NE1 has their tour. Angelina has the kids. Right now, we have my aunt, Madeline, and Vinny planning on going with me to this fitting."

 

"I'll set up a flight for my mom and Hyeyoon. They'll be there. Don't panic. It will all be okay."