CHAPTER 38 : Indescribable

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“TRUST IS LIKE A PAPER, ONCE IT’S CRUMBLED, IT CAN’T BE PERFECT AGAIN.”

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(Jiyong’s POV)

*June 21, 2k--*

“Bro, it’s been a while and you’re still single.”

Kai said. I just continue drinking my beer.

“Don’t tell me you’re still waiting for the goddess.”

I looked at Mino.

“Bro, it’s been what? More than a year already. Move on.” He continued.

“1 year and 11 days to be exact.” Sehun added.

“Hahaha. Are you really counting the days?” Kai asked and Sehun shrugged.

‘Shut up!’ I thought. I didn’t pay any attention to my team mates’ opinion. They don’t even know the whole story.

And it’s true, it’s already a year passed yet she’s not yet back. Fany told me last year that she’ll be back after a month but…up until now she’s not here. I don’t know if she’s keeping in touch with the others but they’re not talking about her too much.

I know they all feel sad about her being away for more than what she promised, I am too.

“Well, when will she be back here anyway?” Jinwoo asked me. “I missed her beautiful face already.”

‘This brat!’ I throw a dagger look at him. ‘She’s mine!’

“Easy tiger.” Taehyun said. “It’s not wrong to miss such a goddess, you know. But we know that you miss her more. We can’t blame you.”

“Aish!” I feel devastated with these brats. “Mind your own business, ‘kay?”

Then I left.

“Cool, Ji! Hahaha.” Mino shouted before I completely exited the place.

‘Yeah. There’s nothing wrong if they miss Yoona. She’s not your girlfriend anymore, so you don’t have the right to get mad at them.’ My subconscious said.

“Ahhh!” I scowled myself in frustration.

I stayed inside my car outside NB 1, where it all started and ended, I think. There were never a day had passed that I didn’t think of her. I keep of looking at her picture inside my wallet whenever I have time. Every day I long for her, I miss her so much that there are times when I just cry silently. Just like right now.

“Why did you left without even waiting for me to prove myself to you?” I touched her face on the picture. “You remember? One of a kind love.”

I cried. I can’t control my tears anymore. I know this is so gay but I can’t help it. I’m willing to give up everything just to have her back.

I called Teddy hyung about the project we’re going to make together with YG hyung and Tablo hyung.

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*June 22, 2k--*

We decided to do the project right now, inside NB 1. Big thanks for YG hyung for closing the bar for this night.

“You ready GD?” Tablo hyung asked.

“I guess.” I sighed. “I really hope it works.”

“I’m sure it will. Just be true.” Teddy hyung encouraged.

“You just have to give your all for this. I’m sure there’s still a chance for the both of you.” YG hyung added.

The camera is already set, the guitar, the stage, the mic, and the lights are all ready too.

“We’re going to film 5 minutes after. Get ready.” YG hyung commanded.

After how many sighs, I ready myself and sat in front of the camera holding my guitar.

“Ready, set, start!” YG hyung shouted.

“I hope you guys will watch this video. Im Yoona of South Korea, this is only for you. Help us reach her with this song.”

Tablo hyung said and he gave me the cue to start my song.

***

(TELL HER by: Jesse McCartney)
I know how it feels
To wake up without her
Lying here all alone
Just thinking about her
…
***

‘Please come back, Yoona.’

***
If you see my girl
Just tell her I miss her smile
Tell her I'm counting the minutes
Gonna see her in a little while
I know when she
Holds on to me
She's the one thing that I could never live without
Oh, oh, oh, oh
And tell her I love her
***

My tears are slowly flowing down my face. I can’t stop. All I want now is this video to reach her as soon as possible.

***
Oh yeah, just tell her I love her
…
***

Please don’t ever give up on us, because I will never do that. I want to you to be with me again.

***
Still can't believe
Her hold on me
She's just so indescribable
I know she knows
But won't you please, please
…
If you see my girl
Just tell her I miss her smile
Tell her I'm counting the minutes
Gonna see her in a little while
I know when she
Holds on to me
She's the one thing that I could never live without
Oh, oh, oh, oh
And tell her I love her
…
I know how it feels
…
Oh yeah, just tell her I love her
***

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“Oppa! Your video got viral!” Yuri shouted at my face as she shakes my arms.

“A million views for just a day! Wow, Ji! You’re not even a celebrity.” Tao said.

I smiled. I hope she watched it.

“Omo! Jiyong you’re so sweet.” Sica said in full giddiness.

“I wish you all the luck Jiyong.” Lay pats my back.

“May the odds be ever in your favor.” Tao joked.

“Hahahaha.” Yuri laughed sarcastically and pulled Tao with his ear.

 I shook my head. These guys are my lights.

“I never thought you can write such good song for her.” Fany smiled at me. “I hope she watched it too herself.”

“I hope for that too, Fany.” I smiled back.

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(No One’s POV)

“Baby.”

“Yes, dad?”

“Are you okay?”

“O-Of course dad. Why wouldn’t I be? I’m busy with stuffs, have friends-“

“You know that’s not what I’m talking about Yoong.”

“…”

“I know you already watched his video. Your mom and I watched it too. Maybe this is the right time to come back.”

“Dad…*sigh* I know I said I’m ready to face him but... He just stopped passing my mind and it helped me a lot. I’ve decided to forget him and that’s final.”

“I know, I know. But honey…I know you’re not being true to us, especially to yourself. Love, it’s a complicated thing honey. You should listen, believe, trust, and forgive again and again. I know that it’s not easy for you, but it’s not easy for him too. Try to listen to him and give him another chance. Forgive him.”

“I already forgave him dad.”

“I know you’re lying.”

“…”

“*sigh* We decided to go back to Korea tomorrow. Are you coming with us?”

“But- Why so sudden? How can I face my friends after lying?”

“I believe you said you’re all ready, that you’re okay. So I guess there won’t be a problem with that.”

Mr. Im left her in her room.

‘I’m sorry mom, dad. But what I will do tomorrow is not the right thing to do. I need to act strong and make them, him, believe that a year is enough for me to move on and forget everything that happened. I have to do this. I have to.’

“God! Who am I kidding?!” She ruffled her hair in frustration.

She knew to herself the real feelings she has. She’s scared, at the same time happy, to see her friends and Jiyong. She is sure that if they saw each other again, especially now that he just declared his love for her to the whole world, she will come running back to him, but she’s going to do her best not to do that.

She looked on the laptop in front of her and played the video that Yuri has sent her 8 months ago. It’s a video of Mu6 begging her to come back. It’s their messages to her, how they miss her and how everyone’s acting weird since she left. Tao went back to being childish as he always try to steal Yuri’s foods and the rumble inside the house will begin, how Fany acted as their mother that day and Lay as the father for scolding each and every one of them. They are making fun of Lays words of wisdom every day.

Whenever Yoona feels the emptiness in her heart, she will just watched the video over and over again until she feels satisfied.

“I love you guys. I love the way you make me laugh when I don’t even want to smile.”

Even after a long year, she’s still crying over him. How she lied to her friends to be back after a month when she already decided to be gone forever. How she run away to her problems, even if it means leaving the most important people in her life. And for not waiting for Jiyong to explain himself to her.

“All I wanted that time is for you to say sorry. But you never came to see me. Now I can’t give you my full trust because you let me down.”

She said while looking at their picture inside her notebook.

---

---
From: +***********

Hi guys! I missed you! Meet me, okay? I want a complete team. I already informed the 3TS about this and they agreed to meet us tonight. I’ll be staying in our house in Seoul, I mean Jiyong’s. I hope to see you all soon! Love lots! Ciao.
---

“Is this for real?” Fany asked as she clutched her phone tightly on her chest, teary eyed.

“Fany!” Sica and Yuri hugged her.

“I guess she’s really coming back.” Lay said, smiling to everyone.

“She.is.back!” Tao said excitedly.

“What’s the commotion all about? It’s 4 in the morning for God’s sake!” Jiyong shouted as soon as he went out of his room.

“Oppa…” Yuri called as tears fell from her eyes.

“What?” Jiyong replied while yawning.

“You think he also received the message?” Sica whispered to Fany.

“One way to find out.” Fany whispered back. “Tao!”

“Hmm-kay.” Tao smiled. “Would you mind taking a look on your phone Ji? Then you’ll know the reason.”

They went back to their room leaving Jiyong and Lay.

“Tss. Leaving me just like that.” Jiyong complained.

“You’ll even thank us for waking you up at this hour.” Lay pats Jiyong’s shoulder as he followed Tao.

“Tss.” Jiyong entered his room and stares at his phone for a minute. “Aish.”

Then he put the phone down and decided to go back to sleep.

---

After 4 hours.

“Yah Tao! We’re going to be late! Hurry!” Fany shouted as she put on her pink helmet.

“Take care guys! We’re heading first. Bye!!” Yuri shouted.

“Asih! Yuri!!!” Jiyong shouted inside his room. He’s pissed at his sister for waking him up again with her loud voice.

He ruffled his hair and took his phone to see the time.

“Unregistered.” He read and automatically, his heart beat rose.

---
From: +***********

Hi guys! I missed you! Meet me, okay? I want a complete team. I already informed the 3TS about this and they agreed to meet us tonight. I’ll be staying in our house in Seoul, I mean Jiyong’s. I hope to see you all soon! Love lots! Ciao.
---

“W-What the !”

---

Later that day…

“Ahhh!”

The girls shouted once they saw Yoona came in.

“Guys!” Yoona shouted and hugged the girls. “I missed you!”

“You look beautiful.” Tao acknowledged.

“Thank you.”

“But you look different.” He continued.

“Hey!” Lay called and hugged her. He lifts her up a bit. “You’ve lost some weight.”

“You mean, y?” Yoona laughed. She stared at Jiyong.

Jiyong was about to smile but Yoona creased her brows at him.

“Aren’t you happy to see me back?” She pouted.

‘What’s happening to her?’ Jiyong thought. He definitely wants to see her back but she’s acting suspicious.

*stiff*

Everyone was shock especially Jiyong when Yoona hugged him.

“I miss my bully turned savior.” She smiled.

“W-“ Jiyong can’t form a word in his mouth. He doesn’t even know if it’s okay if he hugs her back, for sure, he will never let go.

“J-Ji…” Yoona complained when Jiyong hugged her so tight she can’t move.

After a few seconds, he let her go. And they stared at each other. Jiyong smiled and it took Yoona some courage not to cry and to smile back at him. After the awkward smile, she immediately turned her back at him.

“Well, I’m happy to be back.” She smiled. “I will be staying here again, with you guys!” She said excitedly.

Everyone is shocked to see how she treats Jiyong.

‘It’s as if she doesn’t remember him.’ Fany thought.

“You okay?” Lay asked Jiyong and he just nodded.

After a few minutes, Jae entered the house.

“Oh oppa!” Yoona shouted and hugged him. Jaejoong, shocked with the sudden gesture, looked at Jiyong who’s looking intently at Yoona.

“H-Hey.” He greeted.

“Where’s Donghae and TOP?” Yoona asked.

“T-They can’t make it tonight. They had a rescheduling of their TV appearance for their movies, each. But they said ‘Hi’ and ‘Welcome Back’.” Jae awkwardly smiled.

“There’s something wrong with her.” Lay whispered to them.

They chose to ignore her attitude and just partied overnight. Jiyong, on the other hand, didn’t talk nor come near Yoona after. He stayed awkward and just stares at Yoona, whatever she do.

“I feel like there’s something wrong with her, don’t you think?”

Jiyong looked at Jae as he approached him.

“I don’t know, but it just doesn’t seem right.” Jiyong answered.

“For me, too.”

They keep on staring at Yoona as she approached everybody, how she laughed with them and how she shared her ‘vacation’ to them.

The party ended at dawn and they started to clean the trash. Jae left before midnight because he still needs to finish his recordings.

Jiyong is alone in the kitchen. He’s drinking cold water when he suddenly stiffened.

“Oh Jiyong.” Yoona called as she placed the dished to the sink before laughing. “Hahaha. You look like you’ve seen a ghost or something. Am I a ghost to you now?”

“…”

“You know what, let’s put this straight…” She said sternly that made Jiyong’s eyes widen. “…I don’t think you’re happy to see me back. You’re not smiling, you’re not even talking.”

“N-No, your w-wrong.”

“Hahaha. Jiyong you’ve changed! I’m not used to see you being the silent one. Do you have a problem?”

“Nothing.”

“You’ve been stuttering whenever you’re talking to me. Why?” She asked as she washes the dishes.

“You.”

“Me?” Yoona looked at him. “Why me? Have I done something wrong? Omo! I knew it! You’re not happy to see me. It’s still me, Yoona, you’re weakling.” She pouts.

“No! It’s just that-“

“Hey Yoong, let’s go- Oh! Sorry Ji-“

“No, it’s okay Sica. You can go Y-Yoona. I’ll finish that.” He smiled at her.

“Hmm. Okay.” Yoona smiled back.

The girls left him alone in the kitchen.

“*sigh* What’s happening to me? To her?” he ruffled his hair and smiled. “Weakling.”

‘I’m going to win you back, whatever it takes.’ He thought.

A/N : how are you guys??? ^_^

it's already chapter 38.. hehe it's so long ^_^

hope you guys enjoy!!!