Yong Hwa could feel all eyes on him but nobody spoke. He knew they were waiting for him to be ready to speak and he thought, it might as well be now. It doesn’t get any better with time and I’ve never hidden anything from them. After every WGM shoot, I’ve always come home and told them everything honestly. They knew when I started to fall for Seo Hyun. The only ones that I could be honest with in this ruthless industry. What would I ever do without these boys? thought Yong Hwa.

“It hurts. Here” said Yong Hwa, as he pointed to his heart. He was looking down, at his feet. He couldn’t bear to look at his dongsaengs. “I never thought it would be this painful. It hurts so much that I feel as though I’d rather die” continued Yong Hwa. None of s spoke. They just wanted him to be able to say what he felt and not judge him or interrupt him or analyse anything.

“She sang the banmal song for me tonight. But she changed the lyrics.” said Yong Hwa as he smiled at the thought of the song. “At the start of the song, she told me to listen to the lyrics. But when she started to play the guitar, I forgot to listen, I only saw her. She’s so mesmerizing and I don’t mean her physical beauty. Of course she’s beautiful but it’s much more than that. It’s her personality. There are many many beautiful girls in our industry as well, but I don’t get mesmerized by them. I just think Ahh.. They’re pretty. But that’s all. Seo Hyun.. Seo Joo Hyun is different.”

Yong Hwa paused a moment to gather his thoughts. “I still haven’t told her the truth about the song Love Light.” Yong Hwa admitted. “We told everyone it was a song I wrote for my first love and only the part that I wrote thinking of Seo Hyun was the rap portion.” Again Yong Hwa paused. “I thought I had experienced my first love in high school. But I was wrong. After I fell for Seo Hyun, I realized, all those times when I thought I was in love, it was just like. Seo Hyun.. Seo Joo Hyun, is my first love. And, Love Light was written for her.”

“Hyung, you’ll be able to tell her the truth soon.” Jung Shin said earnestly. “Jung Shin-ah, I’m losing my confidence by the second” Yong Hwa said quietly, still looking at his feet. “Did something happen tonight?” asked Min Hyuk. “You were confident for the last nine months, Hyung” he added.

“I don’t know. I mentioned she sang banmal song and changed the lyrics tonight right? Remember the original lyrics? The last phrase was Please look into my eyes and tell me you love me, right? She changed it to I will look into your eyes and tell you I love you.” Yong Hwa said. He was happy to hear that, but he was still losing his confidence, he didn’t know why.

“But Hyung, that’s a good thing, no?” asked Jung Shin. Yong Hwa turned to look at Jung Shin, “I suppose. But I don’t know.. I can’t help feeling less and less confident. The last scene was difficult for both of us. She couldn’t leave. She kept standing there looking at me. When she turned and came back out to me, I felt my heart skip a beat. I was happy. But I don’t know why now, I feel like I’m losing confidence. I’ve always worried that she’s being swept into the emotions because of the show. I don’t know how she will feel now that it’s all over” Yong Hwa admitted.

Jong Hyun who’s been quietly listening finally spoke “Hyung, remember our plan? That you would give her time for all the hype to settle down and then you’d confess to her? Let’s just stick to that plan ok? In the meantime, don’t worry so much. I have faith in our Hyungsoonim.” Yong Hwa turned to face Jong Hyun, looked at him for the longest time and finally nodded.