(While listening to When Night Falls by Eddy Kim)

Author’s POV

Two pairs of feet landed right on the front gate of the penthouse.

The taller figure breathed out harshly-glancing to his left side- as his eyes caught the nervous face of his beloved cousin. He tapped the younger’s back gently and squeezed it a bit, encouraging her in his worry tone,

“By hook or by crook, Amber, this is the time. I know you’re prepared enough for the decision you have made, so regards to that, today is the day you have to pour out everything from your heart. Go take your girl, cousin. I’ll be waiting here for you,”

Amber felt the cold has engulfed her nose and entirely her face as well, besides the coat she put on didn’t tag along any hoodie to cover her head. The beanie she had get the top covered- only the hair she let it grew for months was slightly protected her forehead, ears and neck.

She checked on Key for a moment, “If I can’t make it right, what I need to do, Key?”

The older immersed in silence before he uttered, “Right or wrong, you must have done your best, Ber. Don’t think too much, just go with the flow. I’m here, will be here always for you”.

Amber hugged him then.

As she took a step closer to the guardhouse, she saw Krystal was literally running from the opposite direction. The boyish grunted a little when the younger threw all her body onto her, sobbing silently.

“Krys?” she froze. “What’s…”

“Take me anywhere you want to, Amber,” Krystal pleaded, still hugging her tightly.

“But Krys, your…”

“Please Amber,”

Amber exchanged frowns with Key when the queer approached them and signalled a question ‘what’s going on’ to her.

She gently caressed the top of Krystal then.

“I know just the right place for you two,” suddenly Jessica came in and caught their attention at the same time. She stared straight into Amber’s eyes and said, “I have so many things to tell and ask you too, Amber. Let’s just go after me,”

“Is it related to your mother…? So Krystal…?”

“More than that, Amber,” Jessica replied shortly, blowing a sigh. She took out a bunch of keys and repeated again, “I’m going to drive you all now. Get into the car please,”

Key tapped Amber’s shoulder and gave a nod. He followed Jessica’s steps and hop into the front seat while Amber had Krystal closed to her as they settled at the back.

“Yuri agreed to let you stay with her for now, Soo Jung,” Jessica spoke to break the silence in her car and glanced at the reflection of her younger sister’s face through the side mirror. “Amber, you can visit her anytime you want, Yuri told me she has an empty room in her house that could fit two people,”

“Thank you Jessica,” replied Amber. “I’m totally clueless on what’s actually happening but I’m quite sure that this must be something related to me and I apologize for it,”

Jessica kept her eyes focused on the road and breathed out smoothly.

“Our mother, seems to be against you and Krystal, Amber,” she started. “She found out about you two from the priest of the church of where you exchanged vows before. He happened to know her since they went to the same university back then in San Francisco. Maybe because Krystal wrote our mother’s name as the guardian when you had to fill the marriage forms that the nun asked for,”

Key flinched unintentionally and restrained himself again. He interrupted, “Haish, I knew it from the first place that filling that form is not good. See, Amber, obviously the church people also can’t be trusted,”

The boyish corrected him, “Some of them, Key, not all of them”.

“I am the only person here that should take all the responsibilities, Jessica. All of these happened because of me,” she expressed sadly.

Krystal lifted her chin and looked up to see Amber afterwards. She sniffed and wiped her tears away before leaning more to her lover, listening to the latter’s calm heartbeats. She closed her eyes, pretending she didn’t listen to her sister.

Truly the truth revealed had hurt her but at that time she found comforts only when she had thought of Amber, even though Jessica’s explanation was heard clearly in the car.

Krystal secretly wished, she wanted to be with the boyish- alone, despite of having anyone else including her own sister.

***

Amber bowed politely to Yuri when the older woman handed her a duvet, “Thank you so much, Yuri-sshi. I’m sorry for troubling you,”

Yuri chuckled then as she raised her hand and waved it a few times, “No problem, Amber. I’m glad to offer my house as your best shelter by the way,”

The tomboy smiled sincerely, “Thanks again,”

“Most welcome and don’t remind me about it again, okay? You can come anytime you want, I’ll make sure to give the duplicate key to you soon,” added Yuri before she ruffled Amber’s hair. “Now go have some rest, I’ll be chatting with Sica and Key at the living room. Sleep tight with your wife,”

Amber flashed a timid smile and bowed for more before Yuri’s leaving. She turned around and opened the door, only to see Krystal was sitting on the bed- wearing the oversized t-shirt.

She approached her and sat herself on the mattress too, facing Krystal straight.

“How are you feeling, Krys?”

The wife just shrugged her shoulders as she took the duvet from Amber, and covered her exposed thighs. “I’m not even sure how I really feel now. Hurt, frustrated, disappointed and anything similar with the meaning of those, just count them in,”

Amber gazed into Krystal’s eyes, slightly furrowed her forehead as she ran her fingers on the latter’s long hair. She stared at those sharp eyes as she tried to read what’s in her mind, wondering too what’s the best words to mend her broken heart at the moment.

“Jessica told me everything about what happened back in your house, Krys. I wish I was there so that you would know you’re not alone to face it,”

Krystal felt her lips has been zipped off so she didn’t mutter a thing back. Shifting her eyes down, she avoided Amber’s gaze when the scene reminisced again. She recalled how hurt it was to know the truth though it had clarified almost everything. Undoubtedly, the conflict disturbed her and made her mind miserable as well.

She was immersed in her deep thoughts when she felt Amber’s warm hand on hers.

She heard Amber’s soothing words,

“I’m here for you, Krystal. You probably think that nothing can heal you for now but believe me you’ll be better by time. Have faith on yourself, those broken pieces are not impossible to rekindle again. Letting go, is the cure…”

“You mean I have to forget everything and forgive everyone?” Krystal finally voiced out.

“Letting go doesn’t always means you have to forget or to forgive, Krys. Letting go is when you accept it and then you take nothing as granted. You couldn’t forget all the memories or even to keep them all in mind, but you can decide and choose some of them to stay in your heart,” Amber replied, gently caressing her wife’s palm. She curved a smile to her, “I’m not the right one to say all of these to you but can I get credit for giving my best to make your feel better?”

Krystal gave her unintentionally smile afterwards and mouthed ‘pabo’ to her lover.

“Krys…” Amber’s voice sounded deeper, calmer and that caught Krystal’s attention for more. She eyed the boyish while lifting her right eyebrow, “Hmmh?”

“I have something for you,” Amber told and inserted her left hand into the inside pocket, letting Krystal observed her for a while.

She took the item out and showed it on the level of Krystal’s eyes, making her gasped in surprise.

“I kept this with me all the time, Krys,” muttered Amber as she slowly opened the small velvet-textured box and continued, “Maybe it’s not that expensive but I bought it using my own money that I saved for years. I didn’t have a second thought when I was buying it because I’m sure that one day, I would give it to the woman whom I would love unconditionally,” she paused to see Krystal’s expression.

“Now I don’t have to keep it anymore since it is yours, Krys,” stated Amber while staring at the pretty’s face lovingly.

“Amber…” Krystal went speechless as took the box from Amber and saw a shiny silver ring which was beautifully attached to the clothes that has been holding it up straight.

The boyish let the tears streamed down through her cheeks as she confessed her feeling when their eyes locked,

“I love you so much, Krystal. Would you spend the whole lifetime with me…?”

The younger couldn’t hold her tears too as she let them ran heavily. Bringing Amber’s shoulders closed to her body, she embraced them as tight as she can.

“Yes Amber…” she whispered, sobbing. “And… thank you… Thank you for loving me unconditionally…”

They spent the cold night hugging each other, feeling the warmth and smelling the scents as that was nothing bad happened. Amber didn’t let go Krystal from her arms, holding her tight like someone would snatch her away. She was indeed, sensed a tiny bit of fear and worry about their tomorrow and the day after but when she watched how perfect Krystal was as she fallen into a deep sleep, Amber can’t help but to love her for more and more.

Before she got a time to think of their future, Amber herself had drifted to a peaceful sleep, and dreamed of wonderful things- where she had Krystal, and Krystal had her.

***

(Listening to Time Boils the Rain by Kris Wu)

Amber’s POV

Dear Diary,

Everything’s getting complicated recently. Krystal and I got married, unofficially, in the church where she got baptized. Of course, we didn’t know about it before until the nun disclosed the details of how the priest found out about our unplanned vows.

I’m glad that Krystal has Jessica by her side. She’s the one who’s been trying to mend her sister’s broken soul, though I know she’s hurt as same as Krystal. I told Krystal not everyone has a perfect and happy family. Sometimes, people with wealth comes from a broken family.

While some poor people mostly finds comforts and bliss from his family even though he has struggles in funding daily expenses.

Apparently, it doesn’t matter what type of family we have, it always means- stay together no matter what happen.

That’s when I assured Krystal that we’re now part of each other, we’re family. Her tears are mine and her pains also mine.

I promised her, as long as I’m breathing, I’m going to work hard to build a better lifetime for both of us.

Again, I’m glad Krystal said she trusts me with her life.

I’m now gearing up for the very last final examinations which have only less than two months left. After I’m done, it will be the end of the university life for me. Next phase would be, a stabile job and finding the best area to create a home.

Despite of always feeling different and abnormal from others, I’m still, wanting a regular life. Just like how every dream of a person to get married, and to have a partner that could love and care every day, that goes the same for me as well. Because marrying Krystal is the best thing ever, I don’t have any regret or guilt when I asked her to marry me then I heard she said ‘yes’.

Krystal had once asked, do we need to confirm our feeling and make it legal so that we find evidence in our love-finding?

Legally, by law, written in black and white- fully based paper is a must to declare the love between two souls. That is how the world runs. Since every human is indirectly linked to each other, to be counted in as part of the society, marriage has been seen as the legal one. Without it, the love connection is meaningless.

I agree with it though I can’t see if it brings meanings to every question I have.

They say destiny ties men and women together, but I say, for a different human like me, I create my own one.

I’m married to Krystal because it’s more than love. More than proving the connection we have. Being able to stand next to her and to hold her hand so tight, I pictured us together in one frame. I might be lack in so many things, and even weaker than any men. Only feeling and faith I have that made me think, I could pull off everything. If a man should loves his woman to the fullest, so do I. If a man should be responsible for the marriage that he asked for, so do I.

I did what a real man should do in relationship. I made Krystal and I bounded together in this life, so there’s no doubt I have accomplished the role perfectly.

Only one thing left, my role as a daughter in my family.

They deserve to know the real me. To know who is Krystal. And to understand how our story began.

I am not that confidence to stand right in front of them and look into the eyes and confess everything at once.

My father, will be hard on me.

My mother, definitely she will need time to understand all of these.

And my sister, either she supports or objects, none of it will affect my decision.

I had lived the life that my parents had paved for me since I was born. So now, it is the moment where I pave the way by myself.

I shouldn’t waste a chance if it is already this close.

I think I’m going to be just fine even if, my own family will be against me.

Because I have Krystal, my wife,

Whom is now my real family.

_______________

A very short update to my loyal readers ^_^

I included 'to complete this fanfic' as my goal for this year. 

Just a few more chapters, I guess, it will be the end of everything that I have started. 

Thank you everyone for the supports, sharing of your thoughts here and waiting for me to update it. 

I promise, I'll make it done before 2020 ends. 

As usual, stay healthy and positive! 

Love love, 

YOUR RYAI.