Even though he was right in front of you and you were supposed to be looking at him to follow what he was trying to explain you, you couldn’t. If you would make eye contact with him you’d probably start crying out of nowhere and that was not what you wanted to do. People would think you were crazy and they would judge you, which you didn’t want them to do. Plus you didn’t want to seem weak in front of Baekhyun.

While staring down on your paper you wrote everything down that you heard and you tried to understand it. That was the only way you would be able to forget the whole situation that was going on at this moment. The only thing you could do was trying to concentrate on something else and on something that was more important, although it didn’t seem more important to you.

This relationship wasn’t even going on for that long yet and you had truly thought that it was going just fine, but nothing of that seemed to be true. It was all your own fault somewhere, maybe you just had to give up your school prom even though you really wanted to go. But if Baekhyun didn’t want that then maybe it was for the best of you’d just give up your last chance and just stayed home while he was there, watching the other students have fun because as a teacher he had to be there.

With a big sigh you closed your eyes and tried to think of an solution, maybe you could fix this somehow. You could always ask James if he wanted to be your date, but maybe he already had someone. And not to forget that you had already said yes to Jongdae, and he had seemed so happy with your answer, you could impossibly dump him for someone else. That made there were only two options left, or going with Jongdae or not going at all.

God, how many months had you already dreamt of wearing that perfect dress and being all made up for that perfect evening. To drink punch that tasted like dishwater and to just do crazy dance moves on the floor with your friends without caring what other people thought about you. This was something that you really wanted and now you would have to put it aside.

Besides it wasn’t like you were going with Jongdae because you liked him or something. He was a friend of yours and friends could go to proms together, even without becoming a couple afterwards. If Baekhyun trusted you enough he would just let you go with Jongdae and after the prom he would see that he had worried about nothing because nothing had happened. If he would just give you the chance to prove that…

But the biggest problem was that Jongdae did have feelings for you and that he did like you, and Baekhyun also knew that. And he also knew that if you drank a little too much that you could do crazy things. Maybe that was what scared him to make you go with him. But that could also easily be solved, you just wouldn’t drink anything, there. You just hoped that this all wouldn’t make Jongdae’s feelings for you even stronger, you didn’t want to give him the wrong signal. Maybe you just had to tell him you had a boyfriend but he couldn’t make it…

To say it in short you had just caused that you were in a big mess again, why couldn’t your life just be easy for a while? Why did it always have to be complicated and did you always have to do the right thing. You had really thought that by accepting Jongdae you would do the right thing, because sometimes you had to think of yourself right? Did you always have to shove everything aside because Baekhyun wanted that?

You quickly looked up with a little of panic flashing on your face when you heard the bell ring, which told you that the hour was over. Looking down at your sheet of paper you saw that you only had written down three sentences, while the person next to you had a whole paper full. You had been thinking and dreaming again for the hour, which told you something about how the result of your next test would be.

“Are you okay Heeri-ah? You’ve seemed a little down today, and you didn’t really seem to have your thoughts with you…” James as and you shot him a quick smile before standing up.

“I’m fine, I just didn’t sleep this well tonight that’s all.”

Before you could do anything more stupid you raised from your chair and began to pack your stuff, trying to do it fast. But as you swung your bag over your shoulder your eyes fell on Baekhyun, who was leaning against his desk and was shooting you a begging look, one that asked you to stay and talk to him. You bit your lip and hesitated, were you in the mood to talk to him right now?

“Why don’t you go first, I still have something I need to ask.”

James looked at you for a moment before shrugging and walking out of the room by himself. Luckily he was smart enough to shut the door behind his back, maybe he had sensed that something was wrong. You stared at the door for a moment with your arms crossed over your chest in the hope to block the pain, but it wasn’t really working. For a short moment it was extremely quiet inside of the room.

“Listen Heeri-ah, about what I said…”

“It’s okay. I understand.”

You knew you shouldn’t have cut up his sentence and just had let him tell what he wanted to say and listen to him, but you were scared for that. You were afraid to hear what he was going to say and you didn’t want to hear him officially breaking up with you because you would be devastated of it. It had been a reaction to protect yourself that you had made him stop talking, but he didn’t let it stop him and just went on where he had left off.

“No, it’s not okay. What I said was wrong and mean and I shouldn’t have reacted that bluntly by saying that we should break up. I didn’t think about the way it would make you feel and I should have, especially because it’s not true. I don’t want to break up with you, I was just surprised and angry and I should have talked about it with you instead of making such kin of decisions.”

“I should have listened to your explanation of you accepting Jongdae’s invitation before starting to scream at you like that and screwing your whole day by what I did. I was reacting like a guy because I know that Jongdae liked you and I don’t want him to steal you away from me. But I’ve had some time to think about it and if you want to go to the prom with Jongdae then that’s fine.

“You’re right, it’s your last chance to go this year and you deserve to go. I also wouldn’t like it if you would go with some strange guy who would treat you bad and I know Jongdae wouldn’t. And what you said about the fact that I can’t take you…That’s right too so that makes that I’ve got no right to stop you from going to your prom with Jongdae. “

His words touched you and you and you walked forward, letting your bag drop on the floor, stumbling into his arms. You let out a sob and let him hold you tightly while he whispered ‘I’m sorry’ In your ear and ‘I didn’t mean it’. You believed him, after all it had been a very heated moment and you had both been angry at each other. Things that you don’t mean slip out very quickly at such moments.

His hand rubbed over your back as his nose pressed against your cheek, it was a very calming thing. You were just so happy that he hadn’t said that if was truly over or that you couldn’t go. He was so understanding and you couldn’t ask for anything more, he was  great boyfriend and this made you even more scared to lose him the next time.

“Now that we’re talking about the prom anyways…” He mumbled and you looked up at him.

“Miss Kim asked me if I wanted to go with her and I said yes, just like you I didn’t want to go with someone I didn’t know and I still want to go because I want to keep an eye on you. And, well, she asked me and so…”

You could see that he was afraid to hear your answer, not wanting this to end into another fight since he knew what you thought about miss Kim. But to both your amazement you stayed very calm and you nodded with a slight smile but serious expression. After he had excepted you going with Jongdae you didn’t feel like you still had the right to be angry at him for going with miss Kim, even though you didn’t feel comfortable around it.

“As long as she keeps her hands off of you…” You muttered and Baekhyun laughed before pecking your lips.