Chapter 58:

Jihye’s P.O.V

“I don’t like it,” Jiyong says as he shoves another rejected composition of mine. This has been what, the fifth time. I am out of ideas and he didn’t like any single of the five at all.

I sigh and roll my eyes in annoyance. I take a look at the time. “Well, if there’s nothing that suits your taste then I will pass one last song tomorrow, if that song is still no good then drop me out from this collaboration,” I say calmly. “I better go now. I’ll see you again tomorrow and give you the last composition I will make.” It’s already our third day and we still don’t have a music sheet with a written lyrics on it.

“Going already? Can you give an hour more? We need to finish this today or else, we’ll be late in schedule,” Teddy­-oppa appeals.

I smile warmly. “Even if I want to, I can’t, oppa. I need to support Sumi in her school today. This is important to her and I’m the only one available to attend her study report in front of the whole school body,” I explain as I gather my things. I need to get out of this room before I reach my breaking point that I will regret doing.

“Sumi? She didn’t tell me anything,” Jiyong remarks in surprise.

Ah! I forgot that Sumi always invites Jiyong when it comes to her school report. This guy has been supportive of Sumi and every time Sumi asks Jiyong to come and support her, he will come and make a room in his schedule just to come, even if he has to disguise himself. He should have stopped meeting my friends but even if I wish for that I am grateful for his effort to maintain his friendship with my friends even if we ended up badly. “Well, she may have forgotten since she’s been busy for the past few days after all. You have her number, right? Just call and ask her,” I say with a smile. “I have to go.” I bow and exit the room.

As I walk towards the exit and I have finished doing my getup to look like a person who’s going to do something bad. I stop and look at my reflection in the shiny wall of YG. “I don’t want to fall in love anymore.” I then sigh.

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“Are you not yet going to bed, Jihye?” Dahee asks. She just went to the kitchen to get drink some water. “It’s already late. You should sleep already.”

“I’ll sleep in a few minutes. I will just finish this.” I didn’t look up from the …oops no, it is sheet, a music sheet. I am about to finish the song that I came up in the last minute of the day. “Go sleep already,” I utter, still writing the lyrics of the song.

“Arasso,” Dahee says and I know she has this perplex expression on her face. She says her response uncertain. “After that sleep, Jihye,” she reminds, “after all, you didn’t come back to Korea to be sleepless.”

I chuckle and nod my head. “Of course,” I answer amused. I didn’t even want to come back here but I have to since my child is buried in here. My angel is not a shackle that traps me in Korea but an angel that ties me to my roots and memories, happy, memorable, regretful, lovely, beautiful, whatever people call it, they are memories made by me.

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T.O.P’s P.O.V

“Why doesn’t she get mad? Why doesn’t she shout at me whenever I reject a song written by her?” Jiyong blurts out madly and drunk.

I don’t know what to think of this. Is Jiyong trying to make Jihye angry? If that happens, will he be happy or satisfied? If he’s doing that on purpose, what is his reason? “What will you do if she gets mad?”

“I will…”

See? Even Jiyong can’t answer his own problem. Yes, he can trouble Jihye by doing this but is it worth it. He is exerting effort when he said that he only wants to do collaboration with Jihye because of her talent. Why effort for nothing?

“Ji, do you still like Jihye?” I query. Well, you can get honest answer to a drunk man. I better ask now rather than when he’s sober.

“I don…”

“Just honestly tell me how you feel,” I speak.

Jiyong looks at me wretchedly. “Will I act like this, if I don’t? You may have all thought that I am smitten by Anna when I was still together with Jihye but that isn’t the case. I love Jihye for who she is. She showed me many things that I didn’t know about myself. She thought me things from being understanding and less jealous when it comes to people revolving around someone I love. She is my sunshine when I’m down and restless. She was mine.”

I see a tear falls in Jiyong’s eyes but he wipes it fast.

“She let go, hyung. She let go when I am holding on,” Jiyong cries in pain and he takes another swig of beer.

Youngbae looks at Jiyong pitifully as he hides his self in the corner. We, all, know how they love each other that Jihye let go for the good of Jiyong but as long as Jihye doesn’t give a valid reason then there will be no end in this crazy problem.

“Why did she let go?” Jiyong murmurs as his body drops on the couch from drunkenness.

“I don’t know, Ji,” I respond even if Jiyong is knockout.

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Eunjae’s P.O.V

“Why is she sleeping in her work table?” I inquire as I arrive early in the morning because I am working in the bar.

“She said that she’s writing the last song before she loses herself,” Chaewon answers. This girl gets up early and been a bit mature.

“Did she finish it?” I ask again.

“I think but I am a bit worried about the title of the song,” she says concerned.

I hurriedly go towards the sleeping Jihye and gasp in surprise. “Is that really the title of the song?” I utter to Chaewon. Is this girl freaking real? Jihye is asking for madness. “She lost it,” I remark incredulously.

“I have known that, ages ago,” Chaewon replies then sighs. “She shouldn’t have taken this gig.”

“Ditto, Chae, ditto,” I respond back. “I am worried for her well-being but she is so adamant on doing it. Maybe, it is to salvage a bit from the friendship of hers to Jiyong but that is impossible till she hides the real reason why she left Jiyong.”

“She can never say that. This girl didn’t even tell her friends about the reason, how will he even say it to the guy?”

I sigh as I know Chaewon’s point. “The truth always come out, it never hides forever.”

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Jiyong’s P.O.V

“Argh!” I groan as I tap my aching head. “Why is my head hurting?” I moan in pain again and sluggishly walk towards the dining room.

“Want some coffee, Ji?” Top-hyung offers. “You have drunk many beers last night,” he informs and places down a cup filled with coffee.

“Thanks,” I whisper hoarsely. No wonder my head feels like it’s breaking to pieces. I’ll keep a note in my head on not drinking too much beer. I need my game face on when I’m meeting her and I can’t falter. I need strength to stop myself from caving in. My heart has to hold out. “Did I blurt out something incredulous last night?”

Top-hyung looks at me bewildered and shakes his head. “You just drink the bottles dry then you are knocked out. Is there something you are hiding?” He grins teasingly.

“No, there’s nothing to hide,” I answer. I guess I behaved last night. My heart is still safe. “I will finish this then; I better get ready to go to the company.”

“Have you not been informed that the whole group will be in this meeting today? Sajangnim sent a message to our managers that he has chosen the song that you failed to approve,” Top-hyung states baffled.

I stop drinking then look at him dubiously. “I still didn’t check my phone.” Well, if YG-hyung approves of it then it must be awesome. YG-hyung is picky when it comes to music and whatever the song is I will not have a say on it. “But I trust sajangnim’s choice,” I remark.

“Who doesn’t?” Youngbae enters the dining room, ready to go.

I look at myself and sigh. “Top-hyung is ready and, even, you. I better get ready.”

The two boys chuckle and agree with me.

“Give me half an hour and we’ll get going. Are maknae and Dae ready?” I inquire and gulp the coffee in one go.

“They are already in the building. It’s already past 11 in the morning. We are just waiting for you,” Youngbae answers.

“Mianhe, I’ll be out in a jiffy,” I say and hurry towards my room.

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Eunjae’s P.O.V

As I read the approve lyrics, my frown deepens as deep as the Han River. Jihye makes spectacular music but this is too much. She is like bearing her soul. This is her real feelings and I am worried that this will cause another set of complications to the people involve to the unspoken subject. This song is like their journey and how she want to control it but sometimes can’t.

“I don’t want to show it to him, appa,” I remark worriedly.

YG-appa smiles concerned and worried too. “I don’t know but it’s a good song. Anyways, where is Jihye?”

“Sumi’s second report is today and she wants Jihye to support her. We, both, know that Sumi looks up to Jihye like her older sister and has always been supporting our little girl in whatever she does.” Yes, Jihye is not here and she’s sacrificing me in her stead. I don’t even want to present this song. The title is absurd and the lyrics are too on point.

“Well, there is nothing we can do about that. Jihye has been on your back whatever your decisions are. Now, that she’s back she is doing it again.”

“Yes, I am afraid she came back just to get herself busy again,” I speak.

“I’m afraid that is what she is doing,” YG-appa agrees with me.

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Jiyong’s P.O.V

“Great! You are all here now,” Eunjae shrieks cheerfully at us. “I want to present to you the other song that will be released together with ‘Zutter’. The title of the song is ‘Let’s not fall in love’.”

My pen drops when I heard the title and the rest of the boys are mouth wide open.

Eunjae smiles awkwardly. “Yes, you heard me right. The title of the song is that…”

“These words…” Youngbae utters in shock. “Is Jihye the one who wrote this song?”

I look into the lyrics and my eyes go wide in astonishment. “This song…”

“Has no meaning, whatsoever,” Eunjae states seriously. “It’s a song written for the people who are afraid to love and get hurt by love. That is all there to it.”

This song…is too on point.