Author’s POV 




Top walked towards the railing of the balcony and stood there while looking at the bay. The night was so quiet and cold. His heart was aching, he was tired and sleepy and confused. He doesn’t want to be here anymore but YG sent him a text asking a favor and here he was now beside Bom who is getting married tomorrow to another guy. He really doesn’t want to talk about it anymore. He just got tired of getting hurt and he doesn’t want to get mad at Bom nor Nichkhun he just wants it to be over and done with so that he’ll be able to move one already. 

“Here.” Bom said giving him a piece of paper. “I couldn’t say it in your face and I might forget something that I wrote it in a letter.” 

Top started reading the letter and as he go further his heart gets heavier and his breathing started to slow down. The pain in his heart started again and he felt a lump on his throat as he tries his best not to cry. He crumpled the paper as soon as he finished reading it and embraced Bom. 

No words could comfort the pain both of them are feeling right now. Is this right? Why are we doing this? Why am I here? What do I do? Should I tell her I love her too? These are the questions running through Top’s mind while he embraced Bom tightly. 

Bom wrapped her arms around Top’s neck tightly. They didn’t need to say anything to each other. Both can feel what each one feels. All the pain, the suffering, the understanding, the unselfish love for one another, both could feel it just through their hug. 

“Seunghyun, Biyane..” Bom said sobbing, Top let go of their hug and cupped her face with his hand. 

“Ani, don’t say that. I want you to be happy Bommie. Sorry. I’m sorry for hurting you. I’m sorry for causing you pain even up to now. I’m sorry.” Top said pulling her again in a tight embrace while tears won’t stop falling from his eyes. 

“Oppa… I feel guilty for hurting you…” Bom tried to talk in between sobs but it was so painful she just wanted to scream. 

“Shhhh… Don’t say that ok?” Top said placing a finger in Bom’s lips stopping her from what she wanted to say. 

“Oppa is fine. Never feel guilty about me ok? Don’t worry about Oppa alright? I’m fine. I’m happy for you ok? Just stop crying anymore Bommie it breaks me seeing you like this please.” Top said pulling her again into a tight embrace.“Please… I beg of you stop crying… Please... You don’t know how painful it is to see you cry like this please…” 

Top let go of their embrace and place his hand on Bom's shoulder and looked straight into her eyes. "I'm not letting go because I don't love you Bommie. I love you so much that I'm letting you have your happiness. You deserve Nich, and you deserve to be happy. So stop worrying about me ok? I'm ok." he explained. 

Bom couldn't stop from crying even she wants to. She felt it, everything, the love of Top for her, the pain he was feeling and how he was sacrificing for her. Oppa... I love you too. 

"Seunghyun, I love you...." she whispered as Top holds her face and wipes the tears from her cheeks. 

"I know but it's not meant to be... I'm sorry." Top said and pulled her into another tight embrace. 






author's note: 


biyane guys... I just felt I needed to write this chapter... 

I was crying while writing this, it's so heartbreaking thinking about TOP crying like this. The pain he must be feeling... =(