A/N:

I'll be posting my message here...
This is my 2nd to the last angst and I can say...
this is really the hardest chapter to write...
2 more chapters and my fic is finish *throws confetti*
thanKYU for reading my fic! *bows*

Just post your comment later on~

--heechan27

“Being cooperative aren’t we?” Mr. Im smirked as he sees me not even struggling when his men tie me once again. I couldn’t just find the strength to fight back or at least think for a reason to live.

I’m going to die anyway

physically or emotionally…
 

I’ll die
 

Alone

Painfully

I lay on my bed, thinking of good memories that will make me somehow better but instead of that, I feel worse. Maybe if I know I will die right now, I should have spent my life happily. I regret everything I did back then, playing with other people’s hearts and treating them badly. I shouldn’t do that but right now; I’m paying for what I’ve done.

Maybe I’m really a bad person

Maybe they’re right. Maybe I’m just lucky bastard who inherits my parents’ wealth. Maybe I’m just a good for nothing bastard. Maybe I’m really worthless and maybe, Hyukkie don’t really love me.

Maybe I should just die…

My butler then laughs as if he could read my mind, “Not yet. You need to watch this first.” I could here him turning the television on. At first I didn’t mind it but when I hear a too familiar voice coming from it.

“Yoona are you alright?”

“H-hyukkie?” I quickly sit up to see him on the screen. I struggled on the thing that’s holding me to hug him. I tried hard but I couldn’t make it. Hyukkie is there, together with Yoona.

That’s when I noticed them in a room, just them alone. Yoona’s look as if she’s hurt while Hyukkie is trying to help her. I bit my lip hard on what I am seeing that I could feel blood drawing over my chin. How could Yoona be together with him? While I am the one who’s suffering yet I am also the one who really loves him.

Just that time I want to be her. I want to feel Hyukkie’s gentle touch over my skin, to hear his caring words, and to know that he actually loves me. But I am not her, that’s not me.

“D-donghae… h-he hurted me.”

She cries over his shoulder and he, he’s tapping her back. I could see them together and it breaks my heart. Please don’t do this to me. Don’t hold her! Don’t hold anybody, I’m begging! Don’t even believe her lies please! I’m the one who should trust! I’m the one who’s saying the truth! I am the one who really loves you!

“H-he wants me to give this to you…” She grabs a paper from her pocket.

That paper

“NO!” I yelled, even though I know he couldn’t hear me. Don’t take it please! Please don’t get it Hyukkie! You shouldn’t read it, you shouldn’t…

But he grabs the paper…

I taught my world just stop on rotating. He’s holding the paper, the divorce paper. I could only hold my breath while observing his expression. But I saw nothing, just an expressionless face. Doesn’t he get affected?

Just a little bit?

She holds his shoulders and hug him tighter that made me to struggle a bit more, “He wants to divorce you and get all the money… He’s horrible. I didn’t know he could that to you.”

“No! Don’t believer her! She’s fooling you! Please!” I yelled once more as I try to be free. My hands are bleeding too much but I could care less, I can’t let him be fooled by that girl! She’s a devil!

While I am suffering, her dad is watching me with a delightful expression, “Is it painful Donghae-ssi?” Then he laughs again but I didn’t mind him. All I could do is pray for Hyukkie to not believe on her. Or I swear, I don’t know what to do anymore.

“Did he really want me to sign this?”  He asked Yoona who she cries over his shoulder.

No, I didn’t…

Yoona nods as she cries, “Yes.”

“But maybe you shouldn’t so he couldn’t run away…” Yoona lied but I don’t care, I wish Hyukkie will listen. I wish he’ll think like that, even though he thinks of me as an evil person… Just don’t sign that. Please.

Then he sighs and muttered, “So he doesn’t really love me.”

I shrug as if he could see me. I want to tell him how idiotic he is, to punch him so he could be awake on his senses… Don’t you believe on me? I said I love you, I showed that I love and I let you feel that I love you…

Isn’t that enough?

Isn’t that enough to know that I damn love you? Don’t you get it? That I will die if I couldn’t be with you? That I’m going crazy with a single thought of you? Or because you simply don’t really love me that you couldn’t even understand how I feel?
 

Then I saw him, he’s going to sign the paper. I swear, I think I’m going crazy when he did that. I couldn’t stop on struggling and yelling for him to not to do it.

“Just… kill me please…” I beg the man in front of me. I couldn’t take this anymore. I don’t want to see it; I don’t want our relationship to end.

I got on my knees and bowed, “I’ll do anything! Just make him stop! Please! You can kill me! Just… please… make him stop…” I cried hard, my heart is hurting so much. I hate this feeling; this sensation is killing me inside.

He laughs once again and looks at me with a smile, “But this is more amusing Donghae-ssi.”

“No, I can’t! Please! I’m begging…” I was about to beg again but Hyukkie’s words stop me from doing anything. I could feel my heart dying inside me. I couldn’t process what he said. It’s just too huge to swallow. And when those words echo on my head, I think of dying is better than living.

Bitterness..

Sadness…

Anger…

Pain…

Love?

I don’t know. What I can say is just… I regret living in this world.

--

Hyukkie smiled after he signed the divorce paper and said…

“This is what I want anyway…”