Night of the Sakura Tree Hill

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»Night of the Sakura Tree HillReview«

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Story

Title (4/5)

I like it because it simply suits the rest of the story so well; mysterious with a poetic symbolism present. 
 
Just a tad bit of feedback on the lenght; not sure if "Night of" might be necessary in terms if its significant. Adding "night of" objectifies and brings attention to the timeframe and the event itself instead of an image of the Sakura Tree Hill. 
 
Foreword/Description (5/10)
 
I'm faulting you here only because I believe with your capabilities, you could have done so much more for the description. Here it was simplistic and straightforward but you gave away the ending despite building up an aura and suspense within your chapters. 
 
I would have expected a teaser, a snippet, which keeps your readers wondering more. 
 
Appearance (5/5)
 
Full marks here. What else is there to ask for in the poster? Good background, good image, etc. The story seems to be based off the picture to me. Everything else was neat, no complains. 
 
Plot (12/15)
 
I'm going to begin this with a huge compliment; this story is so beautifully written it is nothing short of a work of art. It has a magical and poetic feel which doesn't allow the deep meaning to escape the readers as well.
 
I did have a read at your "meaning" chapter so that is a bit "unfair" but to be honest I didn't quite catch the "actual" meaning you were trying to convey though I had a lot more interpretations of my own; such as how Jongup is a fragment of her imagination, different symbols and meanings for the stars and sakura etc. And yes I did feel the friendship + romantic relationship between the two and about leaving someone behind. But her psychological aspect plays a huge part so that caught my attention the most.
 
Overall in terms of plot wise there's not much "happening" so I won't comment a lot there but being the I am, I do have technicalities to point out:
- I thought Nika was being annoying in chapter 2 where she sounded out her unneeded comments interrupting the story; she already heard it many times and yet found the need to disturb Jongup; that I didn't quite get
- I am not an expert in astrology but when they were naming stars etc; don't you need a telescope for that and not just your eye?
 
But to sum it up, plot was interesting.
 
Originality (15/15)
 
I'll give you full marks here due to it's unique nature and everything else above.
 
 
Language (19/20)
 
Your writing is generally flawless except some phrasing tended to look a tad bit awkward to me but no big deal with no impact on your storyline and meanings coming across. 
 
 
Flow (10/10)
 
Not much plot as I mentioned above but general flow was well-paced despite the huge time gap. 
 
Characterization (5/10)
 
I can't give you a highscore here because there's so much mystery involved its hard to read and judge the characters. Their relationship started off light and then it became serious (although for valid reasons) and the departure was a tad bit sketchy since you didn't include any emotional scenes.
 
And at the end it seems Nika could possibly be insane so...
 
Really not a critieria for your story to be judged in in my opinion. 
 
Overall Enjoyment (10/10)
 
I really liked it. It was a light and heartening read =) 
 
Reviewed by: eunhyuksgal
 
85/100!
 
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Comments

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aya-ELF
#1
Chapter 85: Thank you for the review dear! I was relly shocked with the language part OTL, I'm gonna go fix it right now! By the way, do you think it will be better if I write a simple prologue to explain the life of a demon and what's the benefit to have a mate??
EPIONE
#2
Heyy,

I don't know if you remember me, but I was just wondering where you're currently working this year as a reviewer?
I'd love to request from you again.

Best,
Epione
teenme14
#3
Chapter 72: Okay.. Thanks for the review ^^

Now to clarify XD
Title: As you said, the highlight/ of the story has not yet come. So yeahh..
Plot: This is my first chaptered story after my long hiatus from writing. After the hiatus, I wrote a two shot. So, I kinda forgot how to write a chaptered story XD The present time of the story is at the end of Summer (hence, their summer break). Oh, and I plan on making this fic a 40 chaptered fic.
- I guess I haven't mentioned the type of phone she is using. Samsung phones are quite cheap in Korea but are also expensive for people with financial probs. So, back to her phone. The phone she is using is a Samsung Galaxy Win Pro G3812. And she is using pre-paid which you'll have to top-up each time the credit finishes or it expires, whichever comes first.
- The cafe's delivery system works like this: A person will order through phone, and they jot down the name and address of the person. One of the workers will be asked to deliver the drink/food. If the house is near enough, they deliver by foot. If it is rather far, they ride a bike.
-I am not a dancer and... OTL I really need a dancer to help me whenever dancing scenes come up TT.TT
- About Mr. and Mrs. Kim, it will be known in the next chapter that I'm writing now.
Characterization: I am really bad at this XD Jongin's feelings at first was just merely interested. It's not a crush. He just simply feels interested by the girl. Hana & Sehun... We'll know more once we're more into the story XD

So.. yeah.. Thanks ^^ Sorry for the English mistakes. English is not my first language
teenme14
#4
Chapter 62: Thank you for the review! Glad you liked it! ^^ it's a bit fast paced coz I had a deadline to follow and finished it in 2 days xD I was planning on making a special chapter for the part before jongdae confessed to get to know Hye Sun better and how Jongdae came to like her. I was in a rush, so yeah. I was thinking that a LIFETIME to forget was that, he WOULD eventually fall in love with another girl but he would never forget Hye Sun since she was his first love. About the part where she died: I wanted her to die in an accifent rather than in the surgery was because Jongdae's parents died in an accident too which would somehow, idk, increase the pain (whut)
hanajoe #5
Chapter 32: Thanks for the review^^
I know my i'm not good enough in English T-T but i will try my best to write it!