Red Snow

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»Red Snow Review«

Red Snow - main story image

 

 

Title (5/5)

Fitting, unique, and provides a nice graphical imagery.
 
Foreward/Description (10/10)
 
Short and to the point, capturing your readers attention without giving the highlight away.
 
Appearance (5/5)
 
The poster is beautiful. Full points here.
 
Plot (12/15)
 
The general storyline and idea are well-thought of.
 
The pace was also good as it slowly built towards the finale. 
 
I really admire the intrinsic idea and this is essentially what could have been a beautiful story save the inadequacy in language level.
 
Originality (15/15)
 
I'll give you full points here for an amazing and touching content.
 
Grammer & Spelling (10/20)
 
I'm sorry but this is indeed your weakest point. Short abrupt sentences, grammatical errors, punctuation errors and generally bad phrasing really pulled the value of your story down a lot.
 
Also why the extremely small font and a fully italicized story? It does not make the reading any less uncomfortable.
 
Flow (9/10)
 
As mentioned above, the gifting and suspense is enough to keep your readers up to the end in a smooth transition.
 
Characterization (7/10)
 
The story would have been more moving if their strong love could have been more focused upon. Sunggyu did not seem very upset that Hyorin had broken up with him which is a major minus point.
 
Overall Enjoyment (8/10)
 
Beautiful story but I had to base on my own command of the English language to decipher the hidden meanings. 
 
Reviewed by: eunhyuksgal
 
81/100!
 
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Comments

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aya-ELF
#1
Chapter 85: Thank you for the review dear! I was relly shocked with the language part OTL, I'm gonna go fix it right now! By the way, do you think it will be better if I write a simple prologue to explain the life of a demon and what's the benefit to have a mate??
EPIONE
#2
Heyy,

I don't know if you remember me, but I was just wondering where you're currently working this year as a reviewer?
I'd love to request from you again.

Best,
Epione
teenme14
#3
Chapter 72: Okay.. Thanks for the review ^^

Now to clarify XD
Title: As you said, the highlight/ of the story has not yet come. So yeahh..
Plot: This is my first chaptered story after my long hiatus from writing. After the hiatus, I wrote a two shot. So, I kinda forgot how to write a chaptered story XD The present time of the story is at the end of Summer (hence, their summer break). Oh, and I plan on making this fic a 40 chaptered fic.
- I guess I haven't mentioned the type of phone she is using. Samsung phones are quite cheap in Korea but are also expensive for people with financial probs. So, back to her phone. The phone she is using is a Samsung Galaxy Win Pro G3812. And she is using pre-paid which you'll have to top-up each time the credit finishes or it expires, whichever comes first.
- The cafe's delivery system works like this: A person will order through phone, and they jot down the name and address of the person. One of the workers will be asked to deliver the drink/food. If the house is near enough, they deliver by foot. If it is rather far, they ride a bike.
-I am not a dancer and... OTL I really need a dancer to help me whenever dancing scenes come up TT.TT
- About Mr. and Mrs. Kim, it will be known in the next chapter that I'm writing now.
Characterization: I am really bad at this XD Jongin's feelings at first was just merely interested. It's not a crush. He just simply feels interested by the girl. Hana & Sehun... We'll know more once we're more into the story XD

So.. yeah.. Thanks ^^ Sorry for the English mistakes. English is not my first language
teenme14
#4
Chapter 62: Thank you for the review! Glad you liked it! ^^ it's a bit fast paced coz I had a deadline to follow and finished it in 2 days xD I was planning on making a special chapter for the part before jongdae confessed to get to know Hye Sun better and how Jongdae came to like her. I was in a rush, so yeah. I was thinking that a LIFETIME to forget was that, he WOULD eventually fall in love with another girl but he would never forget Hye Sun since she was his first love. About the part where she died: I wanted her to die in an accifent rather than in the surgery was because Jongdae's parents died in an accident too which would somehow, idk, increase the pain (whut)
hanajoe #5
Chapter 32: Thanks for the review^^
I know my i'm not good enough in English T-T but i will try my best to write it!