Sleeping Bottom
Story Reviews»Sleeping BottomReview«
Title (5/5)
I liked it and I thought it was duly appropriate with the play on the letters, words and meaning pertaining to "Sleeping Beauty" and his ual position.
Foreward/Description (9/10)
If your main aim is to promote the and attract all the erts out there you have definitely done it. It was short and straight to the point; up his . Simple as that. But note the emphases in the fairy tale "Sleeping Beauty" which I find lacking in terms of drawing the parallalism; will elaborate in the 'plot' section.
Appearance (3/5)
Poster wise; I would have preferred a ier poster with a more prince-like image for Donghae instead of the high-school get-up.
I also didn't like how you made your entire story in italics; I get that it is a narration of historical events but you might want to switch up the fonts; it's liken to almost reading an entire in bold sorta thing.
Plot (12/15)
I'm not going to penalize you much here because I get that the is the center. So let me give you some criticisms on the storyline before going into the .
- I had expected a lot more parallelism done with the 'original sleeping beauty'. I also credit you for making an effort to open the story with the 'original version' so to be honest, I would have preferred to have found more similarities
- Especially if the was going to be the center of the story; it was perfectly fine not having too wild an imaginative and twisting the story so much
- Hae was born, cursed to sleep until his true love gives him ultimately pleasure on his xxth birthday. Meets Hyukjae....princesses arrive, Hyukjae steps up and saves the day etc
- I appreciate the effort you took to ensure that the princesses didn't touch Donghae but allowing his lover to be unconscious for three days?! I'd be worried sick and sneak up to him (yes I get there's guards) so this part is tough.
- Emotion wise; a consideration would be the lack of confession before the ''; making the awakening a much more emotional and meaningful one. Not revealing that they loved each other and then having it proven by the curse. A lot to play with emotions there.
- Last thing; you did good in mentioning the pained expression on Hae's face when he was sleeping with Hyuk. (Heechul's discovery) - could have added how Heechul induced that curse to put him into a peaceful sleep; erasing his worries so that our baby falls into a deep slumber and you can see how serene and beautiful he looks.
Ok to the :
- It was very well done generally in terms of your metaphors and how much attention Hyukjae gave to every bit of Hae's body
- Good inclusion of Hyuk's care and concern towards Hae as well.
- I REALLY loved the idea of having with an unconscious party; its unique and extremely
You know I love you.
Originality (15/15)
You've always had a creative mind. No surprises here.
Language (19/20)
There were no mistakes spotted but I would have liked it if you played your language up a bit more.
Flow (8/10)
Short and sweet but the leading up to the was a bit slow in my opinion especially since it's the center of your story.
Characterization (8/10)
You made a conscious effort to 'put them in their place' in terms of status so I applaud you there. Emotions were beautifully played out as well especially the dinner scene.
I did not quite get Hanchul though. To be honest, Heechul could be the most lacking character despite having a part to play; sassy and powerful and stupid and weird and...I dont get him, also his main role and how he arrived. .
Overall Enjoyment (10/10)
Biased as fck opinion but I think it's a short read worth your time.
Reviewed by: eunhyuksgal
89/100!
Comments