Phoenix in Stone
Story Reviews»Phoenix in Stone Review«
Title (4/5)
Perfectly suitable title but to me "Phoenix in Stone" does not seem as sophisticated or fantasy-like as like "The Trapped Phoenix" or "Unleash the Phoenix" - some creative big descriptive word you think is suitable. Just because the rest of your story is as such.
Foreward/Description (8/10)
It's inspiring and it doesn't give much of the story away. However it seemed to have a bit of hint that this story had some parallel meaning/metaphor/symbolism which confused me; I'll explain later.
Appearance (0/5)
No poster no score.
Plot (13/15)
Penalizing you on two points, as per mentioned above the "alternate universe" and mass appeal.
Like I mentioned above, perhaps the physical description of the story made it seem too unreal and hence I keep thinking if it was just a representative of someone being perhaps in a coma or slipping into depression, shutting herself out from the world and hence having her friends etc pulling her out of it. Getting burnt by the floor etc would be symbolic of her fears. And I guess I was over thinking it and I was supposed to take the story as it is. Adding on to this is the confusion caused in the opening chapters, it almost felt like she was losing her memory time and time again between the first three chapters.
Second point on mass appeal, it might be a story too hard to grasp for general readers. That's my only "problem" with this storyline. Getting burnt, losing memories, inability to heal, being trapped, trying to break free, weird physical appearances etc
However, I must say I did like the beautiful transformation.
Originality (15/15)
You created a universe and its characters so really, it's all good.
Grammer & Spelling (20/20)
As usual, nothing to fault.
Flow (8/10)
As said above, tad bit of confusion caused in her lapse of memories and emotions.
Characterization (7/10)
Because you have created "new" characters more could have been put into creating a foundation perhaps. For the opening chapters, first create the world and have your readers understand that they have entered a different realm (or be like me a cuckoo bird thinking it is relatable to humans)
Also, I believe this story has a rather deep meaning so not just on the physical aspect, Chaerin's character needs to be developed emotional. Imagine the pain, trauma and fear being trapped for a long time, being burnt, having your fears be confirmed etc.
Overall Enjoyment (7/10)
It was an interesting read and the fact that you got me wondering what happens next is good ;-)
Reviewed by: eunhyuksgal
82/100!
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