Author's Narrative

 

Aom's sitting on the bench in front of the room. She's recalling her little moment she had with Mean earlier when she stood by the door, looked at them.

 

"Aom?" Tina turned to look at Aom just as Aom was standing by the door. 

"Hi." She smiled and Mean suddenly looked shocked again. 

"Who are you?" Mean asked just as Tina was letting Mean go. 

"Don't go." Mean begged Tina but Tina assured Mean that Aom was no strangers to her. 

"Aom is no stranger to us." Tina smiled and let go of Mean's embrace. 

Tina walked slowly to Aom as she was feeling not well inside her. She was afraid that Aom might have misunderstood on her again. 

"Aom, we're just-" Tina tried to explain Aom though Aom stopped Tina. 

"We have plenty of time for that." Aom whispered to Tina just as she was walking away from Tina. 

"Hello, there, Mean. How are you feeling?" 

"Who are you? And what are you to my sister?" 

"I am Aom and I'm a friend of your sister." Aom smiled and Mean didn't look convincing. 

"A friend?" 

"Yes, a friend. And I am a friend of yours too." Aom smiled. 

"You're a friend of mine? Why don't I feel like that?" 

"Because you forgot everything. You have to remember back, okay? Everyone wants you back." 

"Do you want me back too?" 

"I do. We're friends, remember?" Aom smiled. 

"Friends forever?" 

"Forever." Aom reached out to hold Mean's hand. A warm squeeze could warm Mean's heart down. This warm squeeze could make Mean believe everything even if Aom knew that everything was a lie. She and Mean had never gotten well together. They had that little something inside their heart that they knew they wouldn't get well together. 

 

Tina has finally put Mean to sleep, which is practically a relief since Tina needs someone to talk to. Someone who is willing to listen at everything. And that someone that she knows is Aom.

Apart from being scared that Aom might misunderstand again, she's relieved to know that Aom didn't take that seriously. But the quesiton is, how did she know about Mean being the hospital?

"How is she?" Aom asks just as Tina has come out of the room. 

"She's fine now, Aom. Don't worry." Tina smiles the best smile she can afford to Aom now. 

"Good then." Aom smiles back. 

"How did you know Mean is in the hospital?" Tina asks just as she's placing her hand on Aom's. 

"P'Air texted to me telling me the situation though she didn't tell me in details. I thought you might have needed me here. So here I am." Aom shrugs. 

"Thank you for being here. I need your more than anything." Tina places her head on Aom's shoulder. 

"Anytime, Tina. I will always be there for you." Aom places her head on Tina's. 

They both are enjoying each other's company then Aom breaks into quesiton session again. 

"How did this happen?" 

Tina turns her face up to see Aom and she knows Aom is so keen to knowing this. Then without any other options, she has to tell Aom everything that she knows. Even if it's about the part that she and Air discussed. How Mean overheard and how Mean fell off from the stairs. The image of Mean falling from the stairs haven't disappeared from her memory yet. She wants more than anything to erase this memory but she knows she can't. 

"Mean overheard you?" 

"Yes."

"I thought she had always known how we feel for each other." Aom shakes her head.

"She knew about it but I think she wasn't ready to accept the name we bear for each other. I mean the relationship thing. That is why she was so shocked to hear it. And she...." 

"Are you blaming yourself for this?" 

"Can I not? It all happened because of me, didn't it? If I hadn't spoken about it, she wouldn't have known."

"Yet you didn't know that she could hear you. Stop blaming yourself and listen to me. Whatever happens, I'm with you. If she didn't know it today, she would know it some time in the future. Be grateful that she's fine now. I don't want to think of anything worse.

Actually, I also felt a little bit guilty when I heard that from you. But I'm still grateful that she's fine. Mean and I never actually get along well, but I wish her all the best." 

"Thank you for your understanding, Aom. It's one of the 123 reasons why I love you." Tina giggles. Aom is finally relieved to hear Tina giggles again. It's her favorite sound in the world. 

"You even list down reasons why you love me?" 

"I do." 

"Like what?"

"1. You have long hair. 2. You have a cute forehead. 3. You have cute eyes. 4. You have a pointy eye. 5. You're beautiful. And-"

"Stop" Aom giggles. "They're not even reasons." 

"I don't understand why too." Tina laughs. They both stay like this without realizing time keeps ticking quickly.

---

 

Days then weeks then months pass and things keep going on like this. Mean doesn't exactly improve on her memory, which makes it pretty complicated to everyone in the family. 

Steven doesn't really have to stay long with Mean since he doesn't know how to talk to her at all. The memory Mean has with Steven is a little less than everyone in the house. Instead, he uses this reason to excuse himself to work, which leaves the job of staying with Mean to Helen, Air, and Tina. 

Helen is a nice mother though she also doesn't know how to talk to Mean. To make it clear, she doesn't know how to talk to a person who has no memory at all. Mean has no memories at all. She doesn't know who she is, where she comes from and stuffs. Thanks to the photos of Mean in the house, Mean is finally able to believe the whole family again. She soon recognizes her room as soon as she gets in. She claims that she is familiar with the smell and the way things look inside the room, which makes everyone has a high hope on getting Mean back quickly.

Though their hope isn't always right. Apart from feeling familiar with her room, Mean can't remember any other thing. She can't even remember the thing she once had for Tina. Let alone memories with anybody else. 

As mentioned, Helen doesn't know how to deal with Mean but she will always be a sweet mother to Mean when needed. Instead, she tries to spend her time away from Mean as much as she can. She feels like she has done something terrible to her friend, Mean's mother, that she cannot save at all. Mean is in this condition, which makes her break her promise to Mean's mother. And Helen doesn't wish to remember that. 

The job of taking care of Mean falls to Air and Tina. 

Air still has her own business to do, so she rarely stays at home during the day time. Tina also has her own school to attend as well. They can only take care of Mean in the evening together. 

During the day time, Mean has always been inside her room. No one knows exactly what she does in there since she refuses to see anyone but Tina. Instead of revealing herself during the day time, she only appears outside of her room during the evening, which makes everyone have that little joke they share together, which they think Mean's accident has made her become a vampire. Everyone always giggles at this little joke, even Tina. 

As the same as before, Mean is so attached to Tina. Tina sure knows how to make a person comfortable around her. She feels that she should be responsible for everything and here she is, taking care of Mean, trying to talk to her, trying to make her remember everything back. She keeps talking about the past, talking about how they met, how they got along with each other. Tina tries as much as she can to avoid the topic of Mean liking her before. She doesn't want Mean to remember that. She doesn't want Mean to get tangled with her again. Yes, she doesn't want Mean to get hurt again. However, things get more complicated. Like Mean finally gets attached to Tina once again, but no one knows if it's a sister's feeling or something else.

Days of taking care of Mean, the only time that she can see Aom is during the time that she has to go to school. She still repeats her routine by taking Aom to school, and they try to enjoy their time together as much as they can. Aom also asks questions about Mean and Tina doesn't complain about Mean, but more like describing the details of Mean's condition to Aom. Aom is always patient. She listens to every word Tina has to describe and she totally understands it that Tina feels bad about Mean. She totally gives up their free time to Mean completely.

Instead of visiting Mean, Aom would rather stay at home and help her mom out. She expects what to see when she has to see Mean; so, she tries to avoid her as much as she can. She keeps telling herself that she understands everything but she feels that little uncomfortable whenever she sees Tina with Mean. So for a better atmosphere, she'd like to stay at home. 

"You're not visiting Mean, sweetie? It's weekend." Aom's mom blurp out just as she's cleaning the counter. 

"I just visited her 3 weeks ago. And there's nothing to visit. Like she's a normal person with just memories lost." 

"That's the point of visiting. You visit her in order to let her know that you're always there for her." 

"She has the one who should be always there for her." 

"Tina, you mean?" 

"Who else?" 

Her mom gives a little smirk. "Are you jealous?" 

Aom suddenly looks uncomfortable. "No, I'm not." 

"I'm your mother here and I totally know you." 

"Stop, Mom. And what is it with you urging me to go visiting Mean all the time?"

"Because Tina is there. And you wanna see her!"

"Mom!"

"You do realize that you might wanna visit her before it's too late, Aom. You know that." Then her expression has saddened. Aom knows the what she really means. 

"Then just visit her." Her mom continues.

"Okay." 

"I trust you that you can drive smoothly now." Her mom smiles and hands her the car key.

"Of course I can. I have to learn to take care of myself from now on." 

"Yeah." Her mom smirks. 

---

It's been months since the accident yet Mean remembers nothing about her past. Why does it take Mean so long to remember what she has to remember? The doctor, himself, cannot answer this question. He doubts Mean's willingness. Probably Mean doesn't even intend to remember anything at all. However, if they look at this concept, it'll be unfair for Mean since Mean is the victim. Nobody can blame on Mean's willingness because she's the one with the memories lost. 

Tina, as always, has always be patient with Mean. She tries to do whatever it takes a sister to take care of her sister. Everyone in the house totally understands Mean's desire to be with Tina since she likes Tina the most in a way. 

"It's just the way Mean has always been. It might be a sign that at least she can recall the feeling from her past." Helen would say that whenever Tina talks about the problem with her mother. 

The thing is, Tina sometimes is afraid to be with Mean. She's afraid that Mean might return back with the feelings that she once felt for her. She doesn't want it to happen again. No one wants it to happen again. It'll be like another ambush for Mean again. 

Most of the time, Tina gives up her time to hang out with Aom, and she would spend her time with Mean, which makes it a little unfair to Aom. 

"I'm fine with it, Tina. Besides, Mean needs you the most. Just do it." Aom will say this whenever Tina apologizes for not being with her a lot. 

The fact is, Aom can't hide her disappointment in her tone, which makes Tina feel even more sorry than she should be. Aom never bothers to tell her how she really feels about her being with Mean. She keeps telling herself that if she was Aom, she would go crazy by then. And yet, Aom hasn't gone crazy and she still visits them both some weekends. However, something tells Tina that Aom is quite different. Like Aom wants to spend her time with Tina as much as she can or else Tina will lose the chance. But really, Mean has to remember everything back before she can enjoy herself or else she won't be completely happy about her whole life. But what if it takes Mean forever to remember? She will always shake her head to that whenever the thoughts occur. It can't be. Mean will remember soon, she tells herself.

Sometimes Aom suggests that Tina should leave Mean to Air, which is totally fine with Air, but Tina herself insists that she should be with Mean more. To Aom, she doesn't know how long Tina plans to stick with Mean like this and she hopes that it won't last forever. At least that's what she keeps hoping for. 

Aom, herself, realizes a lot of thing. She knows that and she keeps telling Tina that everything is fine by her, but inside, she doesn't like seeing Tina with Mean. She totally forgives Mean's action of wanting Tina the whole time, but Aom still feels that Mean somehow should be independent. Mean always claims that she needs Tina to talk to her, and Tina always agrees to. The quesiton is, why does it have to be Tina all the time? Can't she talk to anybody else in the house at all? 

That's one of the reasons why she doesn't visit the house frequently. 

The only reason that keeps her on going to visit Mean is Tina. She misses Tina and she wants to see her badly. Seeing Tina on weekdays isn't enough for Aom. She nees more time to be with the one she admires and yet, she can't. Ever since they came into a relationship, the only time that they can be really alone is when they were at the beach. Aom assumes that must be the greatest time she's ever had with Tina. 

Aom is now sitting in front of the gate of Tina's house, still debating whether she should get in there immediately or call Tina first so that Tina will know that Aom is coming. But then, she remembers that Tina won't be by her phone mostly since she's spending a majority of her time with Mean. Ever since the accident happened, Mean has always been her priority. But what else can she do? She doesn't like it, and she has to be okay with it. How much time left can she stay with Tina? She doesn't know. 

Just as she's about to honk to the security guards, the gate itself opens and Tina's car is by the gate. Tina's the driver, and Mean's the passenger. They're alone in the car. 

Witht the sight of Aom in a car in front of her, Tina hurriedly gets out of her car and leaves Mean alone for a while. Mean is quite surprised herself that she finally sees Aom. When was it the last time Aom has visited her? 2 or 3 weeks ago, maybe. She still remains in the car just as Tina is walking to Aom's car. Something tells Mean that she doesn't like Aom's presence at all even though Aom has told her before that they were friends. But still, she doesn't like it. And she can feel that Aom doesn't like it too. Then why did Aom tell her that they were friends? Where's the benefits?

"I'm quite surprised to see you today. Mean and I are just driving to see you." Tina leans by the window into the car just as Aom rolls her window down. 

"Really? I'm just here to visit the love of your life." Aom tries to make sarcastic sound as much as she can, which can actually irritate Tina to death. 

"Aom." Tina lowers her voice, and her face isn't playful at all. 

"I'm just joking. I brought you some drinks from Mom's as well. I thought you might have liked her brand new coffee." Aom says just as she's grabbing the drinks from the seat nearby her. 

"It's really nice of you. You didn't have to, sweetheart." Tina tries to again, but Aom doesn't return the smile. 

Then Aom gets out of the car and completely hands the drinks to Tina. Tina gratefully gets them. There are only 2 cups, of course. She then realizes that the other cup is meant for Mean rather than Aom. If Aom had wanted to drink for herself, she would drink it on her way here. 

"Thanks instead of Mean. I'll give it to her." 

"So what are you going to do now that I'm here in front of your gate while you were planning to visit me?" 

"I'm thinking of changing the plan. How about we go to Siam Paragon? I also want to have some new shoes. Let's just go shopping together?" 

"The three of us?" 

"The three of us." Tina smiles. 

"If that's what you want then." 

"Sure then. You can park your car there and we'll ride mine there." She motions to the parking lot inside her house.

"Nah, can you drop by at my house? I'll drive my car back and you'll pick me up there?" Aom puts her hand on Tina's cheek. 

Tina immediately grabs the chance to kiss the hand immediately before answering. 

"I'd love to." She then kisses Aom's cheek in front of Mean, who's staring blankly from inside the car.