Author's Narrative

 

"Mom? Please don't be shocked, okay? I'm on an ambulance right now. Mean has fallen from the stairs and I'm taking her to the hospital. Please, don't ask me anything yet. I just wanted to let you know, that's it." Then Tina hangs up the phone from her mother. 

After Mean had fallen from the stairs, Tina called the ambulance immediately. Later, the ambulance arrived. 

Air tried to insist that she wanted to come with Tina too, but Tina haulted her and asked her to drive behind the ambulance. However, Air seemed to be responsible for this action as well. 

If Air had come earlier, she could have convinced Mean not to run away from Tina like that. She could have done anything to save a person's life. But she couldn't and she can't. 

Back to Tina, she's sitting in the ambulance and she's looking at Mean's face. How come a lot of things can happen in a day? How come the worst thing in her life can just happen in a few seconds? 

"Be fine, please." Tina whispers as she's holding Mean's hand to her face. Tina, like Air, feels that she should be responsible for this action. If she had let Mean get away from her, Mean wouldn't have been in this condition. Whenever she closes her eyes, she sees a picture of Mean lying on the floor, and the blood keeps running down from the back of her head like a flow of the river. Just seeing this image, she opens her eyes back. Though the reality still . She still sees Mean unconcious. It's all her fault. 

By the time they all get to the hospital, Mean is sent to the emergency room immediately. 

Tina, on the other hand, is still standing in front of the door, waiting without knowing what can happen. She sure doens't want anything bad to happen; especially to the life of her sister. 

She's walking back and forth until she finds her legs stiff from the walking though the doctor hasn't come out yet. Again, if anything happens, she knows she's the one to be blamed. 

"Tina!" Air calls out just as she's reached the emergency room. 

"P!" Tina shouts back and without knowing herselkf, Tina runs to the arms of her flesh and blood sister. 

She knows that she's in a scary situation right now, but the warmth of her sister's heart calms her down immediately. With this, she is finally able to think clear before she talks. 

"How's Mean?" Air asks just as she releases Tina from her hold. 

"Still in the emergency room." Tina whispers. 

"Shall we sit and wait?" Air suggests. 

Tina doesn't say anything but nod. Air, who knows how her sister's like, leads her to the bench where they can quietly talk about what happened. 

"Can I know what happen or you'd rather keep it shut first?" Air reaches out to hold Tina's hand. Just as she's grabbed it, the freeze suddenly touches her. Tina's hand is icy cold. 

Then Tina slowly describes what happened at the house before Air came into the action of rescuing. Instead of trying to blame everything on Tina, Air simply sits there and listens to her sister patiently because she knows exactly what Tina needs. A good listener. 

"I feel sorry for this, P. I should have done something better." Tina tries to say sorry for another million times. Air knows how sorry she is, but she just doesn't know how to stop Tina from blaming herself. 

"Look, it's not your fault. You didn't know what was coming. Nobody knew. Let it go." Air pats Tina's back. 

"But I don't feel right. It's like I'm the only one who caused this to happen." 

"Again, you didn't know what was coming. If you knew, would you still hault her and wouldn't let her go?" 

Tina shakes her head. 

"Exactly, that's my point. You don't need to blame yourself for this because you didn't know that this could harm Mean. Now, calm yourself down and wait patiently for the doctor to come out. I'm sure there'll be good news." Air tries to cheer Tina up. 

Air, naturally, knows how to control herself pretty. On the other hand, she's just as frightened as Tina. She doesn't know what is coming next, and she's not even prepared for it. As the oldest sister, she has to be strong to support her younger sisters. She has to explain about what happened to their parents as well. 

Mean has always been a good girl. She's never caused any trouble to any family members (not until recently that she has caused so much headache problems to Tina and herself, Air). But still, she's a good girl that everyone in the family has to love her. She's an understanding kid. 

Hours have passed, and they both remain at the same place. Tina keeps looking at the emergency door as if the doctor will magically appear and tell her that everything will be fine. Though nothing happens. 

"Tina! Air!" Helen, Tina's and Air's mother, rushes to them as their father is following from behind. 

"Mom!" Both of them run to her just as she's reaching them. 

"How's everything?" Helen asks as they're hugging her like lost children. 

"We don't know yet. The doctore hasn't come out." Tina replies. 

"How long has the operation gone?" Steven, their father, finally asks them. 

"A few hours now, Dad." Air replies him back. 

The mother and the daughters all took their seats but only Steven is still standing there. Instead of comforting his own family, he wants to stay away from them. His mind is somewhere away from them. Inside his heart, he knows that he hasn't done his best to protect Mean. He and his wife have made a big promise to their friend to take care of their daughter. Now what has he done. Her only daughter is in there, in the emergency room. The only room which he has ever been scared of. 

"How..... How can this happen?" He finally speaks when he's laying his back on the wall, standing in the opposite to the three of them. 

"I'm sorry, Dad. It's all my fault." Tina dares herself to look at her father's face even though she knows his face is at its worst. 

"Tell me, Tina, tell me how this happened." He whispers out the words which makes the situation even scarier. 

She closes her eyes and releases a big exhale then she slowly describes the process of how it happened. She doesn't tell her parents about the relationship between her and Aom, and how Mean overheard it. But instead, she makes up a story of her talking to Mean by the stairs then Mean just suddely tripped over her own skirt and fell down. She knows that it's not exactly convincing, but it's the best excuse she can think of. 

"Why is it happening to us?" Steven sighs again. 

Suddenly, the doctor comes out of the emergency room. 

"Doctor, how's my daughter?" Steven is the one who asks the doctor. 

"The patient is all fine now though she's still in her unconcious state. I suggest you all to visit her later in the patient room because she will be soon transfered to there. Do not worry, she's completely fine now though she has lost a little bit of blood and there's a bad effect to her brain caused by the accident. We cannot conclude anything yet since we have to wait until the patient becomes concious."

"How long will she remain unconcious?"

"I can tell you that it's not going to be long. Probably a few hours left until the morphine starts to lose its control. We all will have to wait and see." 

"Thank you, Doctor." Helen whispers her thank you and the doctor just nods and walks away.

The whole family comes to be happy a little now that they know Mean is no longer in danger. At least now they know that she's fine though their worry hasn't gone yet. 

---

Air's P.O.V

 

I should be the one to be blamed. I'm the eldest sister though I couldn't do anything but to stand by and watch them all in this condition. My parents trust me to take care of Tina and Mean. But what have I done besides disappointing them? Why was I so reckless? If I had gone there earlier, even a minute, I could have saved them all. I could have done anything which could help her at all. 

---

All of them are now in Mean's patient room and they speak nothing. Tina is sitting on her chair besides Mean's bed. Nearby Mean, of course. My parents are sitting are both sitting on the couch and I'm sitting on a chair by the table. 

Tina, on the other hand, is holding Mean's hand and place it gently on her face. She's thinking of something, I know. She is so much like me that she feels like she should be responsible for everything. She wants nothing but for Mean to be perfectly fine. 

It's been hours already, and we all haven't seen any changes on Mean. What if she has to be in this condition forever?

I shake my head to refuse all the ideas away. Someties I don't understand myself. Sometimes I don't like her for being so stubborn on Tina but now, I feel like she's my real sister. I feel like I want nothing but for her to wake up. Everything can be talked later. Anything can be talked later. 

Then this little miracle happens. I'm still looking at Tina holding Mean's hand. And all of a sudden, the long fingers of Mean starts to have a little shake and that wakes us all from nightmare immediately. 

From a little shake to a big move and Mean opens her eyes slowly. Really slow. 

"Mean? Mean? Can you hear me?" Tina grabs Mean's hand even tighter. 

She's still blinking her eyes slowly as if she can't see well at all. For now. 

"Sweetie? Mean? Can you hear me?" My mom breaks out in a surprise.

"Mean? Can you see us?" Dad's turn to speak to Mean.

"Mean?" I call out. 

We all have called out but Mean can't answer us for now. She's turning herself into a sitting position, her eyes are looking us like we're strange creatures. Like we're strangers to her. She blinks her eyes again as if she thinks it's the right thing to do before answering someone. 

"Mean?" Tina calls out again. 

Then Mean turns to Tina's side all of a sudden. 

We all are waiting impatiently to hear her voice. 

"Who are you?" Mean finally answers out. 

---

Tina's P.O.V

"The patient has lost her memory indefinitely and she can't be estimated at all. The best way to help her bring back her memories is to talk to her frequently and try to bring back the past. However, I suggest you hault yourself whenever she suffers from any headache during the process of remembering. In case it happens, calm her down first." The doctor is explaining us about Mean's issue. 

Outside of room, the doctor and I are having a little discussion about Mean's issue. 

"Why did this happen, Doctor?" I ask him back. 

"She hit so hard on the back of her head that it caused her brain to hit so hard to the skull. With this reason, it can be concluded that she will have this issue indefinitely." Again, he tries to make in plain enough for me to understand. 

Basically, I know nothing about medical thing. I appreciate him enough to make this explanation plainly. 

"Thank you, doctor." I try to smile. 

He smiles along with a nod and walks away again. I'm still standing there again in front of the door, and I absolutely don't know how I can start a conversation with Mean again now that she doesn't know me anymore. 

Apart of me is being selfish that she can finally forget me and that she can start a new life. I can escape from her and start a new life with Aom but it's too selfish to think about it. She's in this state because of me and I'm thinking of running away from her. What kind of person am I?

I walk back into the room while Mean is still looking at everyone like we're all predators. 

"Mean, sweetie, I'm your mother, okay? Please let me get close to you." 

"Why should I even trust you when I don't even know my name?" Mean shouts back to us with teary eyes. 

"Your name is Mean." I try to smile even though I know I'm in a big pain. 

"Why should I trust you?" She looks back at me. 

"Because I'm the person who you have always trusted the most." I smile. 

She starts to remain back to her normal self. The Mean that I have always known. 

She stays silent and she hasn't replied me back. 

"Mom? Dad? P'Air?" I call the out. 

Mom and Dad are still in our conversation though P'Air seems to be lost in her phone. She's texting someone though I don't care about that. She must be telling her girlfriend of how things are going on. She always tells her girlfriend whenever she doesn't feel right. 

"Yes, sweetheart?" Mom replies. 

"You and Dad and P'Air can go back home first. If we all stay like this, we can scare Mean off." I smile my convincing smile, which is my mom's favorite smile of the whole world.

"Can I trust you to take care of her?" Dad asks. 

"Certainly. It's already night time. Just take a rest and come back tomorrow, Dad. I'll be here with her." 

He nods then walks out of the room first followed by Mom.

"Take a good care of her, will you?" P'Air says her piece. 

"I will." 

"Goodbye, Mean." P'Air smiles to Mean though Mean doesn't return back to P'Air. I think I need time to adjust myself with this because Mean has always been polite. She smiles all the time to everyone she knows, but now she doesn't. 

When they all have left the room, I return my attention back to her. 

"Did they scare you?" I ask. 

"All of you scared me." Mean replies. 

I get up from the chair and sits by her at the bed. 

"But I've never scared you before." 

"Prove it." 

"I can't because it's all in my memories. Certainly these memories I have still exist somewhere in your head, but I don't know when you can remember them."

"Are they all good?" She finally is interested in making a conversation with me.

"Most of them are good. Though some of them are bad." 

"Did you hurt me?" She's like a little kid who is keen to asking questions. 

"No, I've never hurt you in my entire life."

"Then why are there some bad memories?" 

"You know, in case you can remember your past back, I wish you could only remember the good memories. I wish you could throw away all those bad ones because it's pretty much as the painful thing to bear." 

"Really? And what are we?" She folds her leg into a circle of her arms. 

"We are sisters." I smile. 

She takes a few seconds to examine my face. 

"Do we look alike?" 

"You can't even remember your own face?" 

She tries to remember but she can't. She's looking around for the mirror but she finds none. 

"I get it." I smile again and continue. "And no, we don't look alike." 

She pulls her eyebrows together. 

"Then...?" 

"You're my adopted sister." 

She opens her eyes widely. 

"Were we close to each other before?" 

"I think that depends on how you define the word "close". I personally think we were close enough to be sisters though you had always thought that we weren't. Strange thing, though." 

"I'm scared, you know. I'm scared of myself. I don't know who I am, what my name is, where i come from, who my parents are. I know nothing then you guys came and told me you were my family. How am I supposed to trust anyone at all when I don't even remember myself?"

"But you have always trusted me before." 

"Now I don't. I don't wanna trust anyone." 

"You have to trust me."

Then to comfort her, I place her head on my shoulder and the trick works. She's so calm now. 

Just as I'm hugging her, an openning sound of the door occurs and Aom's standing there by the door looking at us.