Tina’s P.O.V

“Why are we going to the pet store instead of going to somewhere fun?” I bring up a question after all the silent we have been having since we left the restaurant.

Aom stayed silent and looks at the window and of course, it looks like she’s pretending as if she can’t hear me.

I wait her a few seconds for her answer yet she still hasn’t answered me so I decide to ask her again.

“Can you tell me?” then I look back to the road.

She exhales and then I sense it that she’s looking at me now.

“Just because you don’t know where to go!” I can hear the annoying sound in her voice.

I nod a bit but then protest her back.

“WE have a bunch of places to go, why there?” I shake my head a bit too.

“And what’s wrong with going to the pet shop?” she brings up this question.

“It’s because I don’t like animals! Especially with their fur!” I roll my eyes.

“You are such a meanie! You can’t just dislike animals like that! They’re lovely!” she complains.

“Basically, they only bring troubles!” I raise my voice a bit.

“It’s because you don’t like them!” she complains.

I sigh and stop the conversation. She tells me the direction of where to turn in order to get to her friend’s pet shop.

Honestly, it’s not that I don’t want to go, but I’m sort of allergic to the fur of animals. I can’t stay close with animals or they’ll bring me sneezes. I wish not to tell Aom about this because she seems so excited to go. I know she likes animals. Will that be a trouble for an allergic person to animals like me to stay with an animal-lover like her? I guess not. I think if I can stay as far from them as possible, then everything will be fine.

We finally arrive the pet shop, and like I said, Aom is excited somehow. She gets out of the car before me and the even proves me more that I’m correct.

She runs into the shop and I follow her.

When we get into the shop, I am really shocked when I see this happen.

“Van!” She shouts as she’s running to the guy – the shop owner (I suppose) – and hugs him so tightly.

The guy, Van, he’s sort of young, I mean, he looks younger than Aom somehow. Though not much, and I believe that he’s just a few years older than Aom. He has those small eyes and straight hair and of course, he’s tall.

I can’t help a thing but to stay at the front door with wide opened eyes without having a blink or without having to feel allergic to the environment around me.

I somehow think that my assumption earlier wasn’t correct. She wasn’t excited to see the animals. Why do I feel like she’s excited to see the owner instead? I’ve never seen Aom in this way before. Is she really her? I’m asking myself this question now. Or because I’ve only known her for a few days that I can’t judge her yet? She’s been this innocent girl to me since we’ve met and I doubt nothing about her that she will go this way. What if she’s her boyfriend? What if they have something secret that no one will ever know about?

“It’s good to see you! I miss you so much!”  The guy finally speaks after he released her from his arms.

She smiles so bright, so huge that everyone wouldn’t believe that it’s a fake smile.

“It’s good to see you too. I’ve been thinking of visiting you for a long time, but I just don’t have a chance. But finally! I can see you today!” she’s so glad.

They’re having a small chitchat without having to care about me standing at the front door waiting for them.

A part of me still is still debating with my brain of what Aom is like exactly. Don’t get me wrong, I swear to god that I have nothing for Aom and that I don’t feel bad about this but I just feel that Aom is so a different person when she sees this dude.

When Aom finally turns her face to the front door – where I am standing – that’s when she realizes that she left me not introduced.

She smiles a bit and then comes to take my hand and walk to the guy.

“Van, I’d like you to meet my friend, Tina.” A friend? Since when she considered me as her friend?

“Tina, this is the shop owner, Van.” She continues.

So I am introduced and I have to “Wai” him traditionally. He smiles and “Wai” me back traditionally as well.

We spent almost all of our day at the shop. Van liked to show his dogs to Aom and she giggled a lot when she was in the shop. I sneezed many times in the shop because of the allergic of the fur and I almost walked myself out of the shop but I couldn’t. I noticed something from Aom, though. She seemed to be more alive when she was with him that she laughed, she smiled and she talked a lot. Unlike when she was with me, she usually stayed quiet. Is that because of her likeness? I am sure a hundred percent that she dislikes tomboys and I have sworn to her many times that I am not.

 In Thailand, unlike in Europe, when people call girls as tomboys, it means something huge. When we say a girl is a tomboy, that means both her look and her heart are like a man. She dresses like a man and she loves the same gender.

I know Aom dislikes me that she thinks I might like the same gender but I’m not. I admit it that I sometimes feel like Aom attracts me, but it’s just impossible and I just know her for a few days and we have the same gender. Does that make me a tomboy?

To tell you the truth, I feel a bit upset comparing myself with Van like that. It’s like Van can almost do everything for Aom while I can’t. I can’t even make her smile like now. I just study them both today that I can feel it that Van likes her, somehow. That someone makes me question myself again “Who am I?”. The question just pops into my head randomly and it sounds almost funny that I try to ask myself every 20 seconds.

Like I told you, I sort of allergic to the fur of animals and I have to stay at the front door. Aom might think that I am bored and I know she’s trying to entertain me now by bringing a little puppy to where I’m standing for me to play with.

I give her a small grin but I don’t really dare myself to touch the dog because its fur might as well make me go crazy because of sneezing. I try to avoid it as much as possible but Aom is just holding it and comes closer and closer to me until I can’t endure it anymore. My sneezing makes Van get surprised and he giggles.

He walks to me and then has another small conversation with me.

“You’re allergic to animals’ fur?” he asks straightly.

I just smile and nod a little bit and he giggles again.

He walks away and takes a mask then comes back to me again.

“It’s perfectly new, you can use it. Some customers have this kind of problem and I always prepare something like this for them.” He smiles warmly.

This guy, he’s so polite and thoughtful. Why do I have to feel bad about him? Why would I just feel not right about having his face here?

“Thank you. I suppose I should wear it now.” I smile and he hands me the mask. I put it on my face immediately and I am a lot better.

Of course, Aom offers me the dog for me to hold and I kinda like the dog when he comes into my arms. It’s like I feel comfortable holding him in my arms like that.

“I think I like this dog much. He’s so cute.” She says this sentence while she’s putting her hand on its head.

The little puppy is really cute with its chocolate color mixing with white. Its eyes are huge and it’s cute, like Aom said.

“Take it! I’ll buy one for you.” I smile.

“I can offer you for free!” Van laughs a little bit as he’s working with cleaning another puppy.

“You have to earn money, how can you offer someone your business for free like that?” she giggles.

“I don’t wanna have anything form you!” she sounds teasing as she continues her speech and looks at my face.

I shake my head a bit and hand her back the puppy. I know she wants that puppy because the way she looks at it, it’s as if she wants to be with it forever.

“Then I can give you a discount!” Van smiles again continuing his offers.

Aom shakes her head a bit too and still rejects him.

“I don’t think I can own an animal. I have a shop, remember? I can’t have animals there.” She replies as she walks to Van and puts the puppies back into its cage.

Poor little creature, he has to spend his life into a cage like that? Even though I never like animals, I feel pathetic seeing them like that.

We are all in a silent mood for a while and then Van came up with a new topic.

“Have anyone eaten anything yet?” he has done all his jobs now.

Aom smiles to me nicely (in fact, I think this is the first time she has done that to me), and I can’t help but to smile with my eyes back to her since I’m wearing a mask.

“We just had our breakfast.” Aom replies.

Van’s face turns down a bit. “Too bad, I baked this pie this morning, and no one dares his or herself to try it.”

Aom laughs again, and I sense it that she laughs a lot ever since she comes into the shop.

“That’s because you live alone and own this shop alone, that’s why.”

“Yes, you know it. So why don’t you give it a try? At least a bite?” Van teases.

“Alright, I give up. Only a bite then.” She rolls her eyes.

“You speak as if you’re disgusted by my food.” He complains back.

“Just bring it here already.” She shouts a bit with a joking voice.

I’m standing there watching them keeping their conversation flowing as I’m counted out of it. Van gives me his pie, and I have to admit that the amount of sweetness is perfect and the pie is delicious. Though I just don’t feel it yet. I just don’t feel it right, I feel like I don’t belong to this place. As much as I can tell, I just want to get out of here. I am a type who doesn’t like to be left alone. And when I’m left alone like this, I just want to get their attention back to me, but I can’t. Seeing Aom is happy like that, why would I do such a thing like that? Or is it because I’m thoughtful now? It’s something I should consider more about.

Ever since I was a child, I never cared much about what people think about me, hate me or love me or like me, it was their problem, not mine. Just up until these few days, I feel differently. I’m more concerned to what people think of me. Especially, her. I feel like I want to do stuffs to make her notice me, to make her think positively on me. What is that?