Aom's P.O.V

I take a deep breath after I try to swallow so hard when something like this happens. I don't know if she's playing with me or not, but by her looks, I can judge that she isn't in any condition of pranking. Or may be not? I don't dare to talk to her about it and I don't think I should continue any further though how can I continue more without involving her in?

Tina is still staring by the lake, loses herself in a deep thought which I have no idea what she's thinking of. Should I continue to where we left at the moment? should I change the topic? Or should I just stay here not talking at all and wait for her to change the topic?

"I'm just kidding." She smiles lightly without touching her eyes and she's so calm, talking as if she talked nothing serious at the moment.

"Why did you describe so smooth at the moment if you were just kidding? It's as if you have recorded everything about me inside your head." I roll my eyes and she laughs.

"I have and I always will. I just don't want you to freak out, but that's what I intended to do, anyway." She tries to think of something more to say more. "Umm, let's just let you get so confused about this. I intended to pull a prank on you and there's nothing more. If I spoke less, you wouldn't be shocked. So yeah, it went with the flow. But I do notice everything you do."

"What does that mean?" I narrow my eyebrows.

She raises her hand and plays with my head, which I find it bothering and annoying; my hair becomes messy but she doesn't stop.

"Hey, stop that!" I insist and she does. She stops immediately but laughs as if there's no tomorrow coming to the earth.

"You look terribly funny." she's still laughing and I just bite my lips, turn to be aggressive and she turns away to get my away from her sight.

"Why do you always make fun of me?" I repair back my hair and she all she does is to look up to the leaves of the tree as we're sitting under it.

"i don't know. I just enjoy my every moment with you. Cruelty or innocence, I just love it." 

I'm glad she finds herself enjoying the time she spends with me and I just realize that every time I stay with her, it's never been boring. There are always things which she keeps me surprised and I like to recieve this situation with her.

"What's so special about it?" I roll my eyes, pretending as if I'm not interested in things she says, but I swear I'm dying to know about her answer.

"Because you're special." she smiles warmly this time, and I know that she doesn't kid with this stuff. It's totally real.

I'm almost blushing and I have to stop this conversation, trying to find a new one to replace this stupid one. Haha.

We're sitting there, not knowing what to talk about but feel like we're in the most comfortable place in the world. I'm so reluctant to ask her about her family and I feel like it's not invading asking her all those questions. But yeah, since we have nothing to talk, anyway. I'll just give it a try.

"Are you usually alone whenver you're at home?" 

"Good at switching the topic, eh?" she smiles warmly then answers my question. "Well, not always but usually. All I do is to lock myself into my room all day long if I do have holidays. We rarely spend time together because everyone in the family is busy. You don't have to question about my dad because you have always known about him. His life is always about work. Actually, I don't have what it takes to have a warm family. I mean, of course, we only talk during meal time and that's almost frustrating, sometimes." she looks upset by bringing the thought of her dad attached with her brain.

"Why is it frustrating for you?" I ask just as I turn myself to sit closer to her and I can feel the heat from her body. She, as always, is a warmest person I have ever known.

"Every kid would feel the same thing if he or she was in my condition. It doesn't mean I want to have everyone's attention but at least, my family members should pay some attention on me. You know, everybody else besides my family pays a lot of attention to me. I don't know what the money can do now if it's not really in a good condition of the family anymore." she shrugs.

Right, so, even if she has more money thatn anyone else in town, but she doesn't have a warm family at all. I feel pathetic imagining her hiding herself in that room of hers all day without anybody bothering to talk to her.

"What do you usually do when you're home, then?" 

"Well, I do a lot of things, base on what I love, of course. Drawing would be my priority, painting and even cooking. Sometims, I play some musical instruments and write my own songs." she giggles.

"yeah, right." I roll my eyes and she laughs again.

"What about you, Aom? Anything you can tell me which can worth my time listening?" teasing me, huh?

"I don't know what my passion is now that you come to ask me about it. I usually find myself busying helping my mother out. We're not wealthy at all and we like to help each other." I shrug back to her.

"There must be a strong bond between you and her." she admires it, or so as I notice.

Tina stands up and offers her hands to me. She's still standing the way an injured person is supposed to do, haven't been recovered at all.

I'm hesitate to give her my hand then she adds more. "Come, I think we should leave the school. Will you come to my house with me?" 

"Why?" that's all I can respond and a part of me wants to go so badly, well, as long as the place I go is with Tina; and another part of me just doesn't want to because it involves her family and mostly, Mean.

"Don't worry, nobody's home. Unless you talk about my housekeepers and gardeners and security guards? Besides, let's find out what you real passion is at my home because we have a variety of things to do so that you can know about yourself." She's standing there, still offering her hand to me.

Yes, Tina, that's the hand I desire for my daily life. I desire for it but I can't. People might say that I'm a fool for not taking her hand, but I don't want any misunderstandings exist in our way.

I stand up, walk pass her and she just follows, fold her arms at her back and she must be smiling, obviously.

"Are you sure I can go there?" I turn back to talk to her.

She raises her eyebrows as if she finds herself confusing or so.

"Something's wrong with my house?" she suggested up the question.

I don't even hesitate to share her with this thought of mine.

"Yes, there's something wrong with it and I bet you do know it too." I roll my eyes and she's just staring at me without taking her eyes off even it's just a second.

"I don't get it." She pulls in her eyebrows.

I hesitate, debating wheter I should tell her about my problem or just leave it there, pretending there's nothing at all? I guess I'll just let it go with the flow.

"You surely know what's happening around you, don't you? You know who likes you and who doesn't, exactly, right?" I try to be specific, but I don't think I can until she raises this question up.

"What are you exactly trying to tell me? I just am not sure what and who you are talking about. Is it between me and someone I'm familiar with or what?" she seems to be confused and I can't stand her clumsiness.

I take a deep breath, aiming to tell her what I have always been thinking and it gives me flash back. I'm not supposed to mention about Tina's personal life but I feel like I wanna intrude into hers; I just like it.

"You do know what has been going around with Mean's mind and heart, right?" This question, it takes me time to actually find the right words to form into a question like this. 

She takes a few mintutes before deciding to give me her answer and she just walks as we continue our journey crossing a nice view of the lake, but I just don't find myself attracted to the view at all.

She nods and that means a yes. Believe me, I almost sink down into the ground just as I see her nodding like that. I don't know if she likes Mean or not, or it's just my imagination, but they live under the same roof, seeing each other since they were kids. All I know now is that Mean totally likes Tina and she's gonna do whatever it takes to take Tina away for her own good. The way I've seen her looking at Tina before, it's as if she can't share Tina with anybody else. I was almost certain that she definitely likes Tina but I've never brought this topic for our talk until now. May be it's the right time to talk now. I would rather to hear the answer than being so uncertain about me and Tina. I can't bear the thoughts of Tina falling for Mean. All I wanna do is to dismiss the thought and listen to her more. I wish I could, but I couldn't. You don't know how much of my strength it takes for me to maintain myself to stand like I have nothing to worry about. I have 100 fears waiting for me in the future and it's all because of her. What's up ahead is all about obstacles and Tina and I have to endure. How many more do we have to win over? Then, sunddenly, everything turns out to be madness. I'm mad because she's never told me that. I'm mad because she knew everything what I wanted to talk about yet she still pretended. I'm mad because she doesn't really trust me with this. I'm mad at everything; mad at the fact that Mean likes her too.

"All right, then you know." I try to be as calm as I can be, but I don't know how calm I can be if I decide to stay wth her more. I walk away from her, directing myself out of the garden to somewhere I can be alone. I can use Taxi as for my ride back home for myself to keep distance from her.

She's following me, as always, whenever I get mad and really gives me time to calm myself, doesn't she? Then she hurries to grab my hand as I want to pull it hers away. However, I fail to do so.

"Knowing doesn't mean I have to feel the same thing back to her. You're just overreacting." she says as I've decided to look back at her. Her face, flawless, dark brown eyes burning into mine, losing herself into a deep thought about what has just happened.

"Overreacting? I am overreacting? Then what about you? You live under the same house with her, and then knowning the fact that she likes but still doing nothing? Oh, Tina, wake up! I'm just someone who you barely know and I can guess what's happening with you family thing. She's not gonna quit!" Then I pull her hand away and continue my walk. I don't know where I'm heading; I'm just as lost as I should be. 

Of course, that warm hand squizes mine again, reluctant to let me go and I have to challenge myself to stay as well. She still has more to talk and I also want to hear. I don't know if I'm giving her chance to talk but I just wanna hear.

"I know I am just dumb sometimes that I don't know in what way I can get any better. I just am. If I could walk out there, telling Mean what you think I should, then I would. I wouldn't be hesitate to do so. But she's my sister!-" 

"Yes, she's your sister! So do whatever it takes to make her feel comfortable! I'm just an intruder and you have already expressed that!" God! what have I just said?

She stays silent and it's not what she's supposed to do. She's supposed to be yelling at me, if that's what it takes to be in a right condition.

"Of course, I have just expressed it that I LIKE YOU! Isn't that enough? And you're not an intruder and I'd love you to intrude my life and everything because I already trust you with everything I own! What else would you want me to do? Speaking up in a microphone and tell to the whole world and I'm taken by you? I don't have to do it because you already have me! Even if Mean likes me, so then what? I don't belong to anybody else but you! Isn't it not enough? You can give me 100 girls for me to choose but then what? Like I said! I'm not gonna leave you!" Oh my Tina, what have I done to you to make you speak all that way like that? Why do I have to be like that to make you speak every truth out? 

"Then would you please explain me why would you give all the hope to Mean by knowning that she loves you more than just a sister?" I try to sound mean because I'm just good at that.

She shakes her head but not trying to release my hand.

"It takes time for me to actually do something. She's very determined to melt my heart just for her own benefits. I don't know if I have told you this, but the romance I can have between me and her is just a romance which is portrayed by the feeling of sisters. " she presses her lips into a line then continues.

"She's not my flesh and blood and it's not forbidden for her to love me, but I still feel like there could not be anything between us. I know that I sometimes give her hope without realizing myself and I try to behave that. Only if she does love me the right way, then everything I do wouldn't be such a mess until now." She looks down to my hand then continues again.

"I know I have hurt enough feelings of those who like me, and I wanna fix it. It takes time and you know me pretty well by now. How else can I do? I don't want to be a meanie, that's on my top list." she's still feeling guilty for what she has done and is she trying to imply on me that I like her as well?

"I like you. Please don't turn my heart into a trash." 

I have always told myself that I don't know believe in love, especially the love of the homouals. But does it matter now when it comes to be a frank moment between me and her? Before, I thought that I was straight and I couldn't deny it because I found myself having some sort of nice feelings on some guys as well but not too much as now. I feel something too much for Tina that I almost can't stand the chance of seeing her flirting with other girls. May be, I like her more until it hurts. I like her to the limit that I thought I wouldn never like somebody until it hits this point. I don't think I would use the word "Love" for her yet. I don't think I can use it now while I take this word very serious to speak to somebody. Love means a lot to me and when I love someone, it's like the whole world only belongs to ours whenever I see her face. 

She opens her eyes widely, as if she can't believe what I have just said. it must take a lot of her guts to reply in a such a short sentence like that.

"I belong to you, Ms. Manaying." she whispers the very short sentence into my ears.