Suzy was leaning at her head of her bed with her legs straight as she hugged her pillow. She was gazing into the blank space as her mind was occupied with thoughts. Things that happened that day flashbacked in the back of her mind, playing like a drama.

“Are you saying that you are bored with me?” Suzy asked furiously, angry.

“Yeah, I guess you are not my type after all,” Gikwang was leaning at the wall as he grinned devilishly. “There is someone that I like and to get her, I need to release you first,”

Suzy was gritting her teeth, trying to hold her anger. She looked down, biting her lower lips. Her lower lips started to bleed but the pain in her heart was too much for her to feel the small pain on her lips. Her eyes were red, trying to hold the tears but they eventually fell. Then, she slapped him.

‘Pang!’

The sound echoed in the empty concrete area.

Crystal clear liquid rolled down from her not blinked eyes, through her milky chubby cheeks and dropped at her arm. She was too deep into the videos of memories that played in her eyes that she didn’t notice that she was crying. She released the breath that she didn’t even aware she was holding it.

She wanted to blame him but it was her own fault after all. She knew how Kikwang was famous for his playboy attitude. It was she who let herself fell too deep for him. She was the one that let her heart acted at its own will. If only she tried to convince herself that he was lying. If only she never let him enter her heart. All this won’t happen. She won’t be hurt.

Suzy took a deep breath and finally noticed that she was crying as she couldn’t inhale as usual. She chuckled lightly, thinking how fool she had become, not even noticing that she was crying. Suzy wiped her tear. She shouldn’t be acting this way. She shouldn’t be this weak.

Suzy bit her lower lips, as her forehead frowned. “I’ll move on and forget you. I will!” her teary and sparkling eyes expressed the determination.

************

Kikwang was leaning his tummy at the veranda concrete fence, while both of his elbows were resting on it. The cold autumn night air was blowing his hair softly while it coldly brushed through his bared skin. He was only wearing his black tank top and dark checkered boxer pant.

How are you? He wondered as his eyes stuck at the dark cloudy sky. There were neither stars nor moon on that night.

I hope you are okay. Kikwang nodded down, suddenly felt the burden in his chest and the burden raised to his throat. Kikwang gulped, hopping the burden went away.

I do that for your own good, baby dear. Kikwang chuckled, thinking that he still called her with that nickname. The burden started to rise to his eyes, as he could feel they became warm.

 God, if you are real, can you take care of her? Because the truth is I love her so much. There is no way I will fall for someone other than her.

 In sudden, Kikwang laughed hardly, while the tears kept falling from his eyes. It was funny that he suddenly thought of the god and even prayed. It was funny that the playboy who had the girl’s hearts as toys was crying because of one single girl.

I promise that I will still looking care of you even we are not together because I can never stop loving you. That is the least I can do.

Lastly, he smiled softly. “I truly hope you will forget me,”

*********

“I’m sorry, Omma. I have failed,” IU confessed in guilty.

Eun Hee smiled as she hugged her daughter. “It’s okay. At least, you have tried. There is always next time,” she softly whispered.

IU closed her eyes and replied the hug. “Thanks, Omma,”

Eun Hee released the hug and brushed her daughter fringe gently. “Go get some rest,”

“Okay,” IU simply answered and climbed up the stairs. However, she stopped when she saw Yoseob was standing at the end of the stairs.

“Are you okay?” Yoseob asked concernedly.

IU smiled half-heartedly and nodded.

“How’s Jiyong?” IU quickly changed the subject, afraid that the topic would make her burst out.

“He is sleeping,” Yoseob answered simply.

“I guess, I need to get some sleep too,” IU quickly walked passed Yoseob, directly to her room.

“IU,” Yoseob called in a low volume but loud enough for her to hear.

IU stopped her steps but not turning back, waiting for the next words.

“You can always come to me if you need anything,” Yoseob explained.

With that, IU walked away, opened the door of her room and got in.

Yoseob sighed. Maybe he shouldn’t say that. However, he and IU was not in a relationship that he could hug her to comfort her. If only he could do that, if only he could be someone that could hold her freely.

*********

IU stood behind the dark wooden door, staring at the empty floor. Without her noticed it, she bit her lower lip. Slowly, her bottom slipped down and rest on the cold marble floor, as her arms raised and hugged both of her legs while her chin rested on her knees.

Her eyes slowly got teary and she just let it be. She would be crying the whole night. She just hoped she could wake up for tomorrow. She won’t give up. Of course, she won’t. It was just, it hurt her when her hope crushed. No, it was not crushed, just scratched a bit. She still wanted to be a great entertainer just like her mother. She will be.

“There is always next time,” she murmured softly, as if she was whispering just loud enough for herself.

Her phone sounded. She slowly took it from her pants pocket. There was a message. She slid her finger on the phone screen and read the message.

‘Burst you heart out tonight. Don’t hesitate. Omma and I will always support you. Hope to see your smile soon,’

IU smiled behind her tears. Her appa was always sweet and encouraging.

‘Don’t worry. I will let you see not just my smile, also my stubbornness.’

After that, her tears became worse.

Knock! Knock! Knock!

IU was a bit startled to hear and felt the knock as she was sitting behind the door. She gulped, wiped her tears and stood up. Slowly, turned the knob and revealed the knocker.

“Yoseob-shi,” IU softly said, surprised.

Yoseob didn’t reply. He just entered the room, closed the room and took IU in his hold.

“I know I shouldn’t do this. But, I want to at least do something to soothe you. Just thought me as your older brother,” Yoseob whispered. There was a sign of nervousness in his tone but IU didn’t notice it.

IU felt her heart dropped listening to the sentence. Just thought me as your older brother. The words echoed in her confused mind. Was he just thought her as her little sister?

Just a little sister, with that thought, she burst into tears in Yoseob hold. That was it. She gave up on confessing to Yoseob. She knew she would be rejected. Yoseob just thought her as his little sister. She was not capable to change his heart. She was scared to be hurt again. It was so painful. Her heart couldn’t take it. She knew it won’t.

************

That morning, Kikwang rushed to his father office but was stopped by his father secretary.

“I’m sorry, but there is someone else in the room,” the middle aged man spoke formally.

“But the thing I want to say is more urgent,” Kikwang desperately voiced out with his serious expression.

The secretary sighed. “I will inform him about your presence,” then, the man entered the room alone.

Kikwang stayed at the door, waiting for the decision from his father.

“I won’t let her join the musical,” Kikwang heard the woman’s shout from his father room, making him curious about what they were discussing.

“Why are you this stubborn? The past is past. Do you think your revenge is much more important that the reputation of this university. She has the qualification to join the musical. The students saw her performance. The video has been uploaded to the youtube. Now, the whole Korea knows her talents and yet you are being stubborn for your stupid unworthy revenge. I believe the press will flood this office soon, asking for explanation from me. Can you answer them? Yeah, maybe you can. You’ll say ‘I’m doing this for the sake of my revenge.’ How about me? What can I answer? ‘I’m doing this because she wants to’. No! How can I answer that?” That was his father voice.

There was something wrong with the selection of participate for the musical. Kikwang quickly caught the topic of the discussion. He smirked. He didn’t need to even say it out. His father had helped him indirectly. Well, it was for the sake of the university for his father. But to him, it was for Yoseob’s justice.

Did someone just ask me to update? Hehe.. Sorry for making you waiting.. Thanks for the comments and subscribes.