“Yoseob,” IU said it out loud as she was surprised. Unintentionally, she released the little boy from her hold. Her eyes widened as her mind was trying to digest the fact that the little boy’s ‘appa’ was Yoseob.

The little boy was already on the ground, running excitedly to Yoseob, extending his both hands. Yoseob half-squatted, taking the boy in his hold and lifted him up. Then, he turned to IU, tried to smile even though he knew that IU was shocked when she heard Jiyong called him as ‘appa’. He walked closer to IU. He knew he needed to clear this thing by today or they meeting after this would be awkward.

IU just kept sitting on the bench as her eyes following Yoseob pace. Was Yoseob truly the father of that little boy? If it was true, did that boy legal? Did Yoseob have a wife? If he did have a wife, where was she? There were so many questions flowing out of her mind and there were none of those questions she could answer.

Yoseob sat beside IU, at the place where Jiyong sat before. Jiyong was still in his hold as that little boy kept hugging his neck, resting his small head on Yoseob’s shoulder. Yoseob wanted to say something but he was hesitating. What should he say? Telling her the truth? Or just half of the truth?

IU turned her eyes away from Yoseob, not knowing how to react. As the moment kept silent, IU tried to break the icy quiet moment. She was hesitating but she thought it was better to break the awkward silence between them.

“How old is he?” She asked, looking down, didn’t dare to look at Yoseob. She didn’t want Yoseob to misunderstand her. He might start to think that she already hated him. It was no true at all. She was just shocked.

Yoseob patted Jiyong head as he felt it burden on his shoulder. Jiyong didn’t respond, most probably sleeping or just too tired to react. Not looking at IU, he answered. “There years and one month,”

IU just nodded her head, listening to the answer. Yoseob was just 19 years old when he had Jiyong. That was a young age for marriage and having a child. However, it is not impossible. Then she asked another question. “His name?”

“Yang Jiyong,” Yoseob muttered under his breath, not sure whether he should say out the family name.

IU smiled, listening to the name. Jiyong might be Yoseob’s son. She suddenly remembered the features that she found familiar on that little boy. It was because all the features were similar to Yoseob. Jiyong is Yoseob’s. She thought then she exhaled a heavy breath.

“I’m sure there are a lot of things that you want to know,” Yoseob tried to speak out. He changed Jiyong position as he placed the little head on his arm and the lower part of that boy body on his lap. Yoseob smiled as he saw Jiyong was closing his eyes. He was sleeping silently. He must be tired.

IU shook her head. “Honestly, I’m curious but I know I don’t have the right to ask,” IU explained. It was true. If she was Yoseob, she might want to keep it as a secret or she might feel bad, remembering the past that might be hurting.

Yoseob kept silent, listening to IU. He didn’t expect that. He smiled. IU might not as immature as he thought. She might have given a very deep thought before she answered. He turned to IU. He saw that IU was looking at the ground as she kept playing with the zip on her bag. He smiled. She was kind to Jiyong before. He listened to the song that she sang for Jiyong and he knew Jiyong enjoyed the song. He always did. It might not be harm if he told IU. He took a deep breath and released it slowly.

“He was sent to me around 2 years ago. Jiyong was just 6 months at that time,” Yoseob started explaining.

IU was shocked, not with the words but the fact that Yoseob was telling her about that boy. She then noticed how Yoseob was looking at her. It was a sincere look, a look that showed that he trusted her. IU smiled gently, trying to assure Yoseob that he could continue.

Yoseob returned IU’s smile with him. He turned to Jiyong in his hold as he caressed that small guy’s cheek. “People may say he is a burden but to me he is an angel that comes to help me live on,” Yoseob smiled when he felt that tears started to form. He couldn’t cry now, not in front of IU. He took a slow but deep breath and smiled again.

*********

It was a cold night in February. Yoseob was looking sadly through the window where he could see the dark alley beside his apartment. However, his vision was not on the alley. He was remembering his brother, Changsun. Changsun funeral event just ended that evening. He released a heavy breath, showing the vapour out of his mouth because of the cold temperature.

“You are selfish,” Yoseob uttered lowly in his trembling voice. The clear liquids flowed down his cheeks as he bit his lower lip. Now, he was alone. He was never alone, Changsun was always with him. He had vowed that he would be with Yoseob forever but he left him, just like their parents did.

“Hyung, where is our parents?” Little Yoseob who was just 6 years old asked his 8 years old brother, Changsun. Although Yoseob was 6 years old, physically he looked like he was 4 years old. Yoseob was a bit slow in growth but that didn’t worry them. Yoseob liked being small because it made him looked cuter. They both were walking back to the orphanage, the place that they stayed. Changsun always waited for Yoseob before they returned to the orphanage.

“Why do you ask?” Changsun was confused. His little Yoseob never asked about their parents.

“Today, in class, the teacher ask us to bring our parents next week,” Yoseob explained excitedly.

“We don’t have any, Seobbie,” Changsun answered in a weak tone. He couldn’t lie to Yoseob even he wanted too. He didn’t even look at Yoseob face.

“Where did they go?” Yoseob asked innocently, still confused.

Changsun smiled and rubbed Yoseob hair softly. His little brother was still too young but he needed to tell him or it would be harder for him when he started to understand.

“They left us,” Changsun answered honestly as he took Yoseob hand in his.

Yoseob kept silent, looking down as he kicked the small rock on the pavement. “Why?” He asked simply in a low voice, not looking at Changsun.

“I don’t know, Seobbie,” Changsun answered as he looked at Yoseob. His expression was not as excited as before. Maybe he had slightly understood.

“Maybe because I’m a bad boy before,” Yoseob replied with his thought, puffing his both cheeks and pouted. He couldn’t remember his parents at all. He didn’t even know how he and Changsun ended up in the orphanage.

“No, you are not. You are always a good boy,” Changsun said slightly cheerful. He pinched that puffy cheek of Yoseob to cheer him up.

“Then, why they left?” Yoseob asked, looking at Changsun hopingly.

Changsun looked away. He didn’t know how to answer that question. He couldn’t blame Yoseob for being so curious. It was one of children natural attitudes. Changsun decided to keep silent.

Yoseob pouted when Changsun was not answering. Then he went to his own thought. Maybe Changsun was lying about he was a good boy. He must be a very bad boy before so their parents left them. Yoseob turned to Changsun. If he suddenly became bad, would Changsun leave too?

“Will you leave me too, hyung?” Yoseob stopped and looked at Changsun. This time, he truly wanted Changsun to answer.

Changsun who was still holding Yoseob hand was surprised with the stop as he stopped. He looked at Yoseob kindly and smiled as he listened to the question. He leaned forward to Yoseob, held his waist and lifted him up. Yoseob was quite heavy for skinny Changsun but he did that to cheer up Yoseob. He knew how Yoseob loved to be lifted up.

“Why should I leave my cute little brother?” Changsun asked as he looked at Yoseob eyes.

Yoseob smiled listening to the word ‘cute’. Then his expression changed. “What if I make bad thing?”

Changsun shook his head. “I would never leave you no matter what happen,” He assured the little boy in his hold.

“Promise?” Yoseob asked, showing his right little finger to Changsun. A promise would convince him. A child like Yoseob still didn’t know that promise could be broken.  

“Promise,” Changsun replied gently and circled Yoseob little finger with his. Then, he smiled to Yoseob, a promising smile.

Yoseob closed his eyes as he tried to stop remembering the beautiful childhood memories that was torturing him now. Tears flowed down from his eyes. He then smiled, he had decided to follow Changsun and he might even meet his parents. He turned around and looked at the equipments that he had set up before. A rope hung at the ceiling and a chair beneath it. Slowly, he walked towards the chair. He didn’t feel the urge to rush. He had the whole night for himself then he would meet Changsun and his parents. He climbed on the chair and looked at the rope before him.

“Here I come, hyung,” Yoseob whispered softly as he placed his head in the rope.

Ding! Dong!

The bell of the apartment ringed. It stopped Yoseob from doing what he wanted to do. He turned his eyes at the door. He shook his head. Hyung, Omma and Appa are waiting for me. He thought as he continued what he was doing before. However, he stopped again, curious with the ringing bell. No one ever came at this moment. Was it Changsun manager? Maybe it was him. Maybe he came to take something that he left here.

Ding! Dong!

It ringed again. Yoseob stepped down from the chair and went to the door. He looked through the intercom beside the door and saw no one was there. Still, he decided to open the door. Maybe it was Changsun fans. Yoseob smirked. Changsun was not a popular singer but he did have his own fanbase and it made Yoseob proud of him. When he opened the door, he noticed a large basket on the floor, covered with a white cloth, exactly in front of the door. Yoseob squatted and pulled the white cloth that covered the basket. Yoseob was surprised to see a sleeping baby in the basket. Why would someone place a baby here?

Then, he noticed a folded A4 size paper beside the baby. Yoseob took it, opened the fold and read.

‘Dear Changsun,

                I hope you won’t be surprised. I know you never expect this neither do I. However, I’m happy that I have him. He reminds me of you a lot. I heard that you are a singer now. Not as popular as Bi Rain but I know you will be. I’m glad that you reach your dream after you leave me. Don’t worry. I don’t expect that you will come back to me. But I do hope you will take a good care of him. I can’t keep him anymore. It has been a year since I left my hometown and I can’t go back with him. I hope you understand my circumstances.

P/S: I still love you.

You know who,

Yoseob folded back the letter. Changsun was not a popular singer so the bad news might not be passed to the media yet. Or the media thought it was not interesting news after all so they didn’t announced his death. Yoseob sighed.  He was too tired to think about the media or be shock with the letter and the baby.

He looked at the baby. He slightly smiled. He didn’t think the round small face reminisce his brother. The baby looked much more like him because of the chubby cheeks. But he was just a baby. Maybe later, he would look like Changsun. He took the baby in his hold and looked at the little calm sleeping face. He suddenly remembered the moment he felt when he knew that he didn’t have any parents. He was a bit sad but at that time he had Changsun to cheer him up. However, this little guy didn’t have anyone. His mother just left him also did his father.

Yoseob decided to take care of the little guy just like Changsun took care of him. Changsun would be sad if he knew that his son was left alone like they were left by their parents. Unintentionally, his tears fell on the baby face but it didn’t wake him up. Yoseob bit his lower lip. He was too deep in his thought that he didn’t notice that he was crying. He wiped the tears on the baby cheeks and looked intensely at that little guy.

“From now on, I’m your ‘appa,’ okay?” Yoseob told the baby although he knew that little guy won’t understand.

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Twist much? Just hope you enjoy reading this part of the story. Sorry if it is boring. Comments are <3 I'm not sure whether I have silent readers or not but thanks to you too for reading. :)

I'm not sure it just me but this chapter is not showed when I open this fic. I found it after I want to re-post this chapter.. haish~