yoochun's pov:
yunho is the same as my father ?the painting ?...what was my father?
"ne yoochun please …you didn’t answer my question ..what was your father ?"
"I don’t know "
"what do you mean you don’t know ?...yoochun please …its not like only your life on the line here ..mine too ..please …tell me "
I should tell him …but tell him what ?..i really don’t know anything ..
"jaejoong …I really don’t know ..i don’t know what my father was …"
I looked at jaejoong and he just nodded while looking at the floor ..i sighed and said :
"well …for what my fatherwas ..i don’t even know what that means ..i mean if it is what his job was then he was a writer ..but I don’t think that this is what yunho meant ..i don’t know .."
jaejoong looked up to look at me with huge innocent eyes and said :
"then tell me about him ..your father I mean …maybe if you told me I will figure something out ..after all we are in this together "
Yes we are ..and two brains are better than just one …maybe if I told him he will see something I didn’t …
I nodded ,looked down at the floor and started talking :
"my father …my father was ..he was far away from me ..i don’t think he cared about me ..he always sat in his office while locking the door on himself ..he never once talked to me about my day ..he was just way too busy with what ever he was doing in there …once I asked my mom what my father was doing in there and she said that he was doing his job so I asked what his job was she said he was a writer ..i asked what did he write my mother got quiet for a bit then said books ..i nodded and went to watch cartoons again …after couple of years dad started going out of his room more often but not to sit with me and my mom no ..he went outside ..he would stay out for the whole day sometimes and when he gets back he would be angry …he would go into his office and slam the door shot behind him …as much as my father was a mastery to me he became more of that when someday he showed up with painting stuff in his hand ….he took them to his room and started painting there I guess …every little while he would go out with a painting while cursing and throw it in the fire place saying it didn’t work ..i never understood what that is that didn’t work but I guessed he was trying to change his job from a writer to a painter ..i was disappointed cause I thought in that time ..if he wanted to change from writing to drawing why didn’t he draw manga ..thats more interesting than all the paintings I saw him coming out of his room with ….with time I started wondering when he will get one painting right and sell it already ..i mean from where will he get enough money to support us with?...i mean he must have had some money hidden  since he was a writer that he is spending now but what will happen when this money runs out huh ?......but I didn’t have the guts to tell him so ..so I kept my mouth shut while I was watching him draw something then burn it up …..one day (I was ninth grade at the time ) I had a painting contest so I gathered up all my courage and knocked on my dad's door …after like 15 minutes of waiting he said come on in …I opened the door and said to dad ..do you have a sec dad ?...he nodded and said what do you want ?...i explained to him that I had a contest in painting and that I needed him to lend me some of his stuff …my dad suddenly became angry and said to me that his stuff are not for kids and that I should get out of his face already so he could finish his painting …I hated him for that ..i hated him and hated that painting that took all of my dad's love and time so ….one day I waited until my dad went to buy a new paint  and got into his room ..i was going to just throw some paint on  the painting or cut it with a knife but the moment I saw it I couldn’t take my eyes of it …it was so beautiful that I didn’t know what to do ..thats when it hit me ..i don’t have to do anything to the painting ..i just have to make my dad think that I did for a while so he can learn his lesson and after that I'll return it to him and he will become a father again ..well …at least that’s what I thought with my stupid little brain at that time ..so I took the painting and left the house ..i went to a far play ground I used to go to with my friends I figured dad wont know about it since he doesn’t know a thing about me …I waited there for him to call my phone but to my surprise he never did ..i figured after everything that dad and mom didn’t even know the number to my phone ..can you imagine that ?..............
After staying there in the play ground the whole day and night that day  in the morning I went back home with the painting wanting to apologize to dad and mom and get it over with …I figured they didn’t notice I was not there and as for the painting maybe dad didn’t like this painting after all and I was mistaken after all …that I imagined he loved the painting cause he didn’t even allow me to see it when I was in his office so maybe it was so important to him that he wanted to keep it to himself but ..i guess not ..thats what I thought at the time ……
When I reached our house there was police cars everywhere …I walked to one of the police men standing out side my house and asked what was going on … the man told me that kids shouldn’t know and he told me to go home ..at that point I got really angry I don’t know why and I yelled at him saying that’s my home ….the police man was taken back but after a minute he asked me what my name was and when I told him he yelled to someone in the house to come …couple of minutes later a tall man came asking whats going on and the police man told him who I was …the man's face changed from a cold one to a sad one and said :
"So someone of this family did survive "
I didn’t know what he was saying so I yelled at him that I want to see my mom and dad ..he didn’t let me ..instead he sent me with a police man to some guy they called the doc and he told me nicely I suppose that my father had gone insane for some reason and killed my mom then himself leaving only one massage to me ..he handed me the paper ..he must have read it cause he had a very sad face on …I took the paper opened it and it was almost empty except for in its middle was writing in small letters …I hate you yoochuni ….
My dad wrote that to me …in a moment I was able to understand why dad did that …he wanted to take revenge on me for stealing the painting ..but that was …that was too …."
I felt jaejoong's hand on my shoulder and he said in small almost crying voice :
"its ok yoochun…you can stop now …that’s enough "
I shock my head that I wanted to continue but he told me :
"lets continue later …maybe tomorrow …you are shaking badly yoochun im afraid you are going to have a break down "
I looked down at my hands and they were shaking really badly ..i guess all of me was shaking very badly …I nodded and said in small voice :
"im sorry "
jaejoong laughed alittle laugh and said :
"idiot ..thats my line "
Then he got up and said to me to go to sleep and that he is going to do the same …
Suddenly he turned to me and said :
"where are we going to sleep ?"
I said in a 'isnt it obvious kind of way':
"in the bedroom "
"where in the bedroom ?"
"in the bed ?"
"yoochun …don’t you think I should sleep on the sofa ..i mean aya would be really mad if she found out that we slept in the same bed again "
"she doesn’t have to find out plus I aint letting you sleep on the sofa while you are sick neither im going to sleep on it leaving you all alone in the bedroom ..im never leaving you alone again …never ever "
For some reason jaejoong's cheeks turned red and he said :
"that sounds gay "
When I heard him say that I don’t know why but I started laughing so hard then I hit him on the back of the head and said :
"im allowed to say one gay thing  after all the gay things you said and did "
He pouted and said :
"what am I doing ?"
"you are pouting"
"what does pouting have to do with anything "
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…I don’t know …I just don’t know "
He started laughing too after that and we went to the bedroom and I fell into one deep,nice and calm sleep …which I didn’t have since that accident …
The next morning we woke up on the sound of knocking on the door …I looked at jaejoong who lifted his head up ,looked at me with sleepy eyes then got back to sleep ..i laughed at his silliness and went to open the door ..at the door was aya and risa …they said :
"good morning yoochun "
And got inside not even waiting for my answer ..but on second thought risa looked like she didn’t want to be here while aya looked like she wants to see something …I walked inside to find risa sitting on the sofa in the livingroom while aya ?...
"where is aya risa?"
She pointed at the bedroom's way .. …
I walked to the bed room to find aya standing beside the bed looking at the still sleeping jaejoong…
Aya looked at me .took a big breath in and out ,waited for a minute then did it again and waited for another minute but it seemed like it wasn’t working out then she snapped and yelled :
"WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING IN YOUR BED YOOCHUN ???"
"whats wrong with you ?did you forget ? didn’t we agree yesterday that he was in no shape to sleep on the sofa ?"
"HE LOOKED FINE TO ME WHEN HE WOKE UP "
"he was sick ..aya please don’t make a big deal out of this ..we just slept beside each other …whats wrong with that ?"
"WHATS WRONG IS THAT YOU DIDN’T KEEP YOUR PROMISE …WHATS WRONG IS YOU LET HIM SLEEP IN YOUR BED …WHATS WRONG IS THAT YOU ARE ALWAYS LOOKING OUT FOR HIM AND GETTING JEALOUSE OF ANYONE THAT COMES EVEN CLOSE TO HIM …YOU ARE EVEN JEALOUSE OF YUNHO AND HE IS HIS FRIEND ..DO YOU LOVE HIM OR SOMETHING ?"
I swear to god if aya was a guy I would have hit her so hard she wont be able to talk again ..i felt so mad at her I cant even put it in words …
Me and jaejoong are in deep and that …aughhhh…yunho is hurting us and is this close to killing one of us  …my dad and the painting are driving me crazy ….and look where her head is ….
I really love her but sometimes her big mouth just makes me want to leave her and get on with my life …
I sighed and was about to say something when ..
"he doesn’t …im sorry aya I begged him yesterday to sleep here with me ..i was really scared and didn’t want to stay alone …I didn’t know that he promised you not to sleep with me in the bed ..as for yunho..me and him are having a big fight because yunho did something to me so yoochun being the good friend he is looking out for me and he gets mad when yunho gets close to me "
Aya breathed in and out a couple of times and said to jaejoong :
"this time im telling YOU ..dont ever sleep in the same bed as my boyfriend "
jaejoong nodded and whispered again alittle :
"im sorry "
Aya looked at me then away and said :
"im going to go sit with risa in the living room …you two change so we can go to school together "
After aya got out of the room I looked at jaejoong and he was sighing in relieve ..i said :
" im so sorry jaejoong "
"you shouldn’t be ..i should have known better than letting those girls keep making rumors about me being gay ..if I had stopped them from the beginning aya wouldn’t have acted like this "
"its not your fault "
"well…its not yours either "
I smiled ,nodded and said :
"lets get changed before we get more yelling"
We laughed while getting dressed when suddenly jaejoong looked at me and said :
"do you still have that note that your father left you ?"
I nodded while asking :
"why ?"
"just ..can you show it to me ?"
"ok"
I opened the drawer next to the bed and got the old paper out then I gave it to jaejoong ..jaejoong opened it ,looked at it closely then he looked at me and said :
"like I thought "
"what ?"
"remember now when aya was talking about you getting mad when im with yunho and how you looked like you were jealous ?"
I nodded so jaejoong continued :
"well I was thinking how sometimes people don’t get the true meaning behind things and assume other things …that’s when the note you told me about popped in my head …yoochun do you have a lighter ?"
I nodded ,went to the kitchen and got back really quick with the lighter –thank god the girls didn’t see me – and then I gave it to jaejoong ..jaejoong switched it on then he put it right under the note ..i was scared that it might get burned but then jaejoong smiled and said :
"its working …yoochun its working "
I walked to him fast and said :
"what ?what ?..what worked ?"
He gave me the note and to my surprise it was covered with writing …it wasn’t just one sentence anymore …
"how did you know ?"
"I used to play that game with my sister …its quiet an old trick actually "
I nodded smiling ..jaejoong then said :
"well….read it "