Risa's pov:

"Why don't you take a shower? I'll make some tea." Jinki asked with a small smile, holding my trembling hands in his warm ones.

I nodded hesitntly, relunctant to let go of his soft hands, the warmth that would protect me.

"It's alright, Risa. I'm here, I won't be going away." he reassured me, making me nod again, silently turning around to get to the bathroom.

Once I was in the bathroom, I looked at my own reflection, the me in the mirror looking terrible.

My eyes were swollen and red, my skin sickly pale and my hair messily laying on my shoulders.

Slowly I reached out my hand, touching my face and dried up tears.

"Jung risa... you look horrible." I muttered to myself, mocking myself.

A deep sigh escaped me before I went to the shower, turning on the water, quickly warm.

The hot steam filled the bathroom when I went to stand under the running water, enjoying it hitting my my head, flowing down my skin.

It calmed me down and relaxed my tensed muscles.

Why... Why was he there...?

Just the mere thought of that person standing in front of me only a few hours before made me tremble, even under the hot streaming water. 

I can't keep being a whimp like this!

Jung Risa, get out of this mess!

"But... Just why can't I...?" I asked myself, muttering the words, barely audible because of the water hitting the glass doors and the wall of the shower.

"Here." Jinki said, placing a cup of tea in my hands after we crawled under the blanket, warm and comfortable.

I pulled up my knees, leaning my head against the cushioned bed head. 

"Thanks." I tried to smile but even I knew it looked very fake.

Jinki's hand reached the back of my head, gently pushing it on his shoulder. I allowed it, taking in a deep breath.

"I'm a loser, aren't I?" I asked, a scoff escaping me as I thought about how cowardly I reacted before.

"Of course not. What are you saying?" he asked, his voice gentle and soft.

Why is his voice so calming?

Just like a lullaby.

"I acted like a complete coward tonight." I sighed heavily.

"Risa... You're not a loser neither a coward because you met someone from your traumatic past."

I grumbled, holding the cup with tea tighter, the hot steam touching my face.

"I thought I was going to die..." I whispered, Jinki's hand on my leg, resting before he wrapped ir around my waist, pulling me closer to him.

"Good thing you called me." he sighed in relief, telling me his honest thoughts. "Luckily you weren't alone."

My head nodded before I sipped a bit from the tea.

"Red berries." I stated, Jinki humming.

The red transparant color of the tea drew me in, eyes staring at the small waves on the surface.

"Though it has been a few years... you need to get over it. Be strong, Risa." Jinki spoke softly, kissing me a light kiss on my temple.

A soft hum escaped me, snuggling closer to him. 

"It's difficult." I commented.

"I know it is. But he doesn't deserve your fear and worry. He is a good for nothing bastard and should just rot away in prison. He got out because he is rich and because he's a celebrity. You might see him more often, I don't want you to suffer." Jinki said, anger hinted in his voice.

Just the way his muscles tensed against my body told me he was angry.

"I really should just let it go, isn't it?" I asked, giving myself