“I think I’m in love with you and I’m terrified.”

Unedited

Relationships were… complicated. He had never been in a serious relationship before, most of them being either toxic or strained. He just wasn’t good at them, his significant other either indulged in an on/off again relationship, or they left him after a few weeks of becoming official.

Jiyong had a hard time counting them as real relationships

“And if you look over there you can see-”

This was the first time he would count a relationship as real. This is the first time that he had ever been able to call someone his after 4 months of commitment and mean it. Their had bene fights along the way, but his lover had never threatened to leave him, he had never left him.

The man at his side understood him. He understood how to fight for Jiyong and he understood that it wouldn’t be an easy battle. Even when Jiyong had tried to push the man away, as he had so many times during his previous relationships, Seunghyun had held onto his hand to only pull him closer.

“I love that about them. They shine so bright that-”

Love.

Jiyong's heart pounded in his chest. Love was a complicated word. It was a word more complicated then the relationship itself. Jiyong believed in love, but it scared him. He was scared of being loved, and he was scared of falling in love.

There was the fear of falling in love, only to have your heart ripped out as they no longer loved you. It scared Jiyong. It scared him in a way that he might feel things stronger than a simple like. It scared him that Seunghyun would have the power to destroy him.

He didn’t like giving anyone power over him

He trusted Seunghyun though.

“Why are you crying? Do you hate it here?

Jiyong let the tears he hadn’t even felt flow as Seunghyun fussed over him. He looked panicked, as though he didn’t know how to handle a crying Jiyong, and he looked worried. This was a date he had set up, after all. It would hurt Seunghyun if he thought Jiyong wasn’t enjoying it.

“I’m sorry. I can take you home. I just thought a quiet nice in an empty field would be nice. Nothing but us and the stars.

It was nice. It was calming and relaxing and just- nice. They weren’t able to go onto many dates so this one was so perfect, so on time as they had been going through a hard time with the lack of attention. They had been arguing lately because of it.

Seunghyun moved to stand only to drop back down to continue wiping the tears from his face. He shouldn’t be crying, he was just so overwhelmed with feelings he had never felt before, emotions he had never had to dealt with. His teary eyes met sad ones

“I’m sorry. Tell me what’s wrong so I can fix it.

“It’s not-

“Is it the food? Can you not eat this.

The food was delicious. He shook his head

“Is it too cold? Will you get sick? I brought the heater for-

Jiyong buried his head into the older man's chest, effectively cutting off every thought the man had on sharing. He was still crying, the tears just wouldn’t stop

“I’m scared.

It was barely a whisper but he knew he had been heard as hands rubbed through his hair, soft whispers of comfort surrounding them.

“What scared you? Was it something I-”

“I’ve fallen in love with you and it scares me.”

Seunghyun froze, stiff, his hand dropped to his side and Jiyong quickly wiped his remaining tears before lifting his head. The man looked dazed, as though his soul had left his body. A few minutes passed before Seunghyun's gaze connected with his own

“You love me?

A nod

“After all this time, you’ve never-"

“I love you.”

Jiyong flinched as a rough pair of lips clashed into his, brushing his lips at the contact before a tongue forced their way past the threshold to explore his mouth. He moaned, closing his eyes, as he was pushed back onto the blanket spread out beneath them.

The were equally flushed as they separated. Jiyong in a daze, Seunghyun as though he was living on cloud nine

“Say it again.

“I love you.

It was blinding, Seunghyun's smile. It was so bright that it could rival the sun. Jiyong reached to cup the man's face, tracing his lips with his thumb before the man lowered into another kiss. This time, slower and more sensual.

“I love you to, Jiyong."

Jiyong smiled into the kiss. The words held the certainty that screamed truth. Seunghyun loved him as much as Jiyong loved the man. They loved each other. The feeling made his heart sore.

It was still scary, but Seunghyun would make it worth it. He always did.