The longest chapter I've ever written in my life. Sorry if I make you flinch and such in this chappie, it's really cheesy ahaha. Also thank you for commenting and all of your support you guys. The comments are my motivation to keep writing :)

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~Yumi~

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I didn't know what to expect cause it felt like a dream come true. I was standing by the windowdoors, half open, staring at the beautiful scenery I had in front of me, trying to understand that this is isn't a dream that is actually .. reality.

The scenery in front of me, was almost like it was brought to me from a fairytale, a picture in the book that was no put in front of me. I could almost cry at the beautiful scene since this is beyond your imagination itself.

I saw the lake down the pavement, it's bridge swaying from side to side due to the small waves the lake was doing. The pavement down was neatly put, flowers stretching out along the way and if you followed the path, took to the left, you could see the steam coming up behind the tree screen, the hot springs.

The sun was about to set, it's color was coloring the entire sky, pink mixed with a slight glow from the yellow beam, coming from the sun. The trees was blowing in sync, along with the soft and cool breeze from the nature. Even the soothing sound from the wind was relaxing.

I had changed into a white long dress, strapless and my hair was a bit wavy. I didn't know why JaeJoong had bought me this dress but I had to put it on and wear it for the night. He also said that he had bought me a bikini but that he wasn't the one who picked it out. He just told the shopassistent that he wanted something cute, something that's comfortable and that it was either, yellow, white or black.

In the end, the shopassistent had already put it in a box and JaeJoong hadn't seen how it looked like but he said that he would be satisfied with whatever cause I looked pretty in anything. It turned out to be a black one. It was pretty cute in a way since the upper part was wrapped in the back into a coque.
Anyways, I kind of figured out that we were suppose to have supper first and probably head down to the lake and later on to the hotsprings.

I chuckled lightly as I looked at the scenery again, trying to not miss out anything. My eyes wandered forth and back, and when I had assured myself that I had memorized everything I closed the big door, sliding it back to it's place and put the drapers back.

Even the drapers looked lovely. It was white, you could see through it. I guess it was there just for the decoration's sake but there was another draper behind it, matching well to the white, in a creamed color, and I guess that draper was the one, preventing the sunlight to come in, in the mornings

I walked slowly out of the bedroom, closed the door behind and I slowly walked down the hallway, hearing the soft instrumental piano playing smoothly, giving you the feeling of romance and.. the relaxed feeling. I was looking at the walls down the hall, seeing pictures of JaeJoong and his family. JaeJoong's first day in kindergarden, JaeJoong's first steps, his 100th days since birth. Pictures of every thing he attempted to do for the very first time. I couldn't help but smile at each and every one of the picture. His mom seemed like she loved decorating cause there was flowers along the hallway, fresh, like it was brought into the house just a few minutes ago, not to mention the beautiful decorations along the wall.

I rounded the corner and I soon stepped out to the livingroom. The stereo system was one, explaining why I could hear the soft piano playing and he had also lightened the candles, that was hanging beautifully from the walls. Seems like his mother loved candles, that is probably why the scent of strawberry's was filling up the entire cabin.

Soon the smell of food hit me and I followed it slowly, entering the kitchen to see JaeJoong finishing the cooking. He had already cleaned the dishes and was right now placing the food neatly on the plates. He had also changed his clothes into a v-neck tee, a black one and he was wearing knee long shorts, making him look even more handsome. His hair was also fixed, seems like he had put in some wax in it and I could even smell his perfume from where I was standing.

Perfect

I walked over to him as he still was concentrated on the food, not noticing me or hearing me enter. I slowly wrapped my arms around his waist and leaned onto him and I felt him jump a bit out of fear but relaxed as soon as he heard me chuckle

"It's pretty" I whispered and looked at the food

"Finished exploring the house?" He chuckled

"Nae~~ Now I just want to be close to you" I said

He chuckled and spun around and took me into his arms and kissed me lightly on my nosetip

"Let's eat.."

He took the plates with the right hand, just like a real waiter and took my hand in his left hand and we walked together to the table. He placed the plates right where we were sitting and then pulled out my chair, treating me like a princess and then he was gone for a minute or two and I started to realize why. He had shut off the lights and I then saw him wandering around with a lighter, lighting every candle that came across his way and when he was finished he sat down in front of me

"Seems like your mother loves candles" I chuckled

"She adores it. According to her it's the best item that has ever developed on this earth" JaeJoong laughed

"The cabin is so beautiful.." I whispered and looked around again

"I know right.. Dad.. bought it for their 10th year anniversary of marriage.." JaeJoong chuckled

"Chincha? Whoa.."

"Cheesy huh?" JaeJoong laughed

"Aniya~~ It's.. so beautiful. Romantic.."

"You're saying that I'm not?" JaeJoong pouted

I chuckled and smiled at him

"I haven't thought about it yet" I said innocently

He rolled his eyes

I grabbed his fork and took one of his carrots and wanted me to eat it, in other words, he wanted to feed me

"Wae?" I said embarrassed

"They say that carrots are good for the eyes. So I made this meal with lots of carrots and you have to eat it all" He chuckled

I was so touched by his words that it felt like my heart was going to come up out of my throat and land on my plate or something cause it was beating like crazy

After the dinner, after we had been talking about school, the guys and stupid stuff JaeJoong had done with them, we eventually got ready to go down to the hot springs. JaeJoong told me if I wanted to freshen up or anything I can take the chance now since he was just going to clean the dishes and such. I don't know why but I had a feeling that he was hiding more than that but just to spare him the discussion and my questions, I decided to go to the bathroom and freshen up. I washed my hands and my face and applied some lotion again and some perfume.

When I was finished JaeJoong was waiting for me by the terrace as he was leaning against the door. I went outside and he smiled at me

"Finished?"

I nodded

"Kah Ja"

We started to walk down the pavement, and it was actually much prettier now than it was when I was standing in the bedroom, on the balcony, looking at it.
JaeJoong didn't say much but I felt him pulling me closer to him and I didn't mind. It just felt even better.

We soon arrived where the hotspring was and when we entered behind the screen I saw that the hotspring was designed like a cave. The actual hotspring itself was designed as a jacuzzi, it wasn't big but enough to have at least 6 people in it. On the right side you could see the waterfall streaming down and you could swim inside the cave . The steam was even coming out from there.. You could swim through the waterfall and probably it was a lot more cozy in there cause if you had friends here you could have some time by yourself if you were sitting inside that cave

"There's a girl screen over there if you want to have some time by yourself before going in" JaeJoong said and pointed at the other screen on the other side of the hot spring.

"I'll wait for you" He said and kissed me softly on my cheek before walking away from me

With a trembling heart and a nervous feeling inside of me I walked over to the screen and entered it. There was a small chair, a small desk made out of wood as well and a hanger for me to hang my clothes. I knew that all I had to do was to take off the dress since I was wearing the biking underneath but I needed more time than that since I had to calm myself down

I sat down on the chair and tried to control my breathing when I suddenly heard some kind of massage music coming on. Hearing some kind of rain falling and the piano, the violin playing in slow, smooth tunes, making your mind and body relaxed even more. I felt that the music was helping me and I also noticed that I was calming down even more.

It was already getting dark and I could see the moon preparing itself to take it's place on the black sky. I looked myself in the mirror before taking a deep breath and going outside. When I came outside JaeJoong had this time the lights.. It was built inside the small wood floor that was built around the hot spring and it suddenly became a lot more romantic and cozier. I saw even some lowered lights coming from the cave and I was so amazed by it's beauty. The steam made it look even more romantic..

I couldn't see JaeJoong anywhere and I looked around first on the pavement, then at the screens but soon I heard something from the water and JaeJoong came up to the surface. He had already gone into the water. He had already taken off his shirt, wearing his swimpants only. His hair was now wet, his hair totally destroyed because of the water but I didn't mind cause he looked y like that. I could see his arms and his abs, which kind of surprised me cause I didn't know he was exercising. A total of 6, 8 with his chest muscles.

I swallowed hard..

He shook his head and the water flew everywhere. He then opened his eyes and I saw him looking at me. His eyes becoming wider as he was looking at me

I started to feel uncomfortable with because of his eyes and this was actually the very first time that I had kind of..worn so .. little clothes, exposing my entire body, wearing only bikini. I looked away from him but I saw him from the corner of my eye coming closer and he then stood up, the water just by his chest

He pulled out his hand, waiting for me to grab it. He didn't look away and his eyes were constantly on me. I swallowed hard as I felt my heartbeats increase.

"Come in.. It's warm" He whispered softly

With my hand shaking like a leaf that is being blown by the wind, I grabbed his warm hand and entered the water slowly. He took me into his embrace and pushed us away from the edge with his feet and I was swept away along with him. Just like he said, the water was awfully hot. It felt nice to the skin and I felt every single of my muscle relax. He chuckled quietly as he was holding me in his arms, swaying around with me in the water. I couldn't touch the bottom of the hotspring since I was too short but JaeJoong could.

He was holding onto me tightly, and I felt how close I was to him. I started to get even more embarrassed since I could feel his upper body right now.

"You look beautiful"

His words made me automatically look at him but even before I had time to look him straight in the eyes his lips soon touched mine and I felt his arms wrap around my waist and pull me closer to him. My hands that were still shaking a bit slowly made their way around his neck and I felt myself coming closer to his body.

I don't know what was happening but even though I was in the hot spring, the warm water surrounding me, i still managed to shake even though JaeJoong was holding me.

JaeJoong soon pulled away and looked at me, touched my face softly as his left arm was around me, holding me close to him

"Why are you shaking so much?" He whispered

I shook my head

"Mol la yo" I whispered

I had no idea why I was shaking. even my heart was beating faster than usual and I had never felt my heart beating this fast before. Of course, it was always beating fast whenever i was kissing JaeJoong but for some reason it was beating faster than usual tonight..

JaeJoong wrapped his other arm around me and I felt his right hand placing it on my back.

"Go under water for a bit. Maybe you'll stop shaking then.." He whispered

"You're going with me then?" I asked with a tiny, scared voice

He laughed

"Nae~~ I'll go with you"

I took a deep breath and so did he and within a 2 seconds we were under the water. Just like he said it was warmer and I felt my entire body stop shaking slowly and I started to feel the warmth taking over my body. I felt myself loosing oxygen and I needed to get up to the surface to take another breath. I think I made it clear to JaeJoong that I had to get up so when I was about to push myself up to the surface I felt him holding me back down and soon his arms was wrapped around my waist and he pulled me closer. I didn't understand what he was trying to do until his lips met mine and I felt him giving me oxygen.

I was amazed how well it went cause I felt the oxygen coming into my lungs and I felt my body soon relax since it was kind of breathing right now. I started to feel even more comfortable and I kind of realized that JaeJoong was trying to calm me down.

I couldn't hold back my feelings anymore when I realized his soft, easy and careful approach towards me and I instantly wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer to me and before I even had time to think we were out of the water and he pulled away from me, breathing heavily

"I didn't expect that!" He breathed

I breathed hardly

"Me neither" I said between my breathings

He chuckled happily and pulled me closer and soon i felt him swaying us on the water, and soon towards the cave.

"We're going through it..Ready?"

"Nae~~"

We got through the waterfall and my eyes widened in shock when I saw how beautiful the cave was inside it. There was some kind of seat a little deeper in it and you could sit, or more of leaning against the wall. The lights were lowered making it even more cozy and romantic and you could hear how clearly the music was coming out from the speakers. The steam blocked the opening so I guess that whatever you were doing in here, the people outside couldn't see through it since it was so thick.

JaeJoong leaned against the wall and he dragged me along, and I was soon placed in front of him, my head resting onto his chest while his arms were wrapped around my stomach right under my chest

"I like it this way" I heard him say, breaking the silence.

"How?" I whispered with my eyes closed

"Us two.. just like this" He whispered

I soon felt his hands making me sit up and his hands were moving on my back and my neck. Then he slowly started to massage my back. His hands making careful and soft circles on my shoulderblade

I felt myself relaxing even more while listening to the music and JaeJoong's breathing and I leaned forward with my head as I felt him massaging. His hands made their way up to my neck, softly caressing it and then down on my back again..

I don't for how long we had been out here but seems like the warmth of the water never disappeared, in fact it was increasing more and more, like we were inside a pot and the boiled water was becoming warmer and warmer due to the stove. The steam was still surrounding us, and somehow make us sweat but at the same time not..

Suddenly I felt his lips on my neck, making me tremble even though I was still in the hot water. His kisses made it's way up from my shoulder blade, up to my right shoulder and soon kissing it's way, coming from the right and up to my neck. I felt myself leaning more to the left and I think he got the signal and kissed my neck even more.

I felt him breathing hard and his hands were still massaging my back. Suddenly his hands took a hold of me and he spun me around his lips soon found mine and I felt the kiss becoming more intense and passionately.

I wrapped my arms slowly around his neck, playing with his neck and hair and I felt his hands playing with my back. His hands soon made their way up to my neck carefully. It started to tickle and I slowly started to figure out what he was trying to do. His left hand were still on my back but his right hand were right now untying my upper part of the bikini.

So this is why I had been shaking ever since we came down to the hotspring. Was it because of this I was afraid of? My heart started to beat faster and I felt myself kissing Jae harder, his kiss becoming more intense as well.
I didn't know if I was ready but I knew that I could trust Jae, that he would stop if I said no. He untied the upper part of my bikini and I felt it slowly slide down my neck, shoulder. I was lucky that it was dark cause at least he didn't see me blushing.

I soon felt myself shake again but he then pulled me closer and his lips started to kiss my neck

"Don't.. be afraid" He whispered

I wasn't. I started to understand that he wasn't trying to hurt me. He wasn't trying to use me.. He was gentle, taking it slowly and was letting me adjust myself to the situation. If I gave away any sign that I didn't want to, he stopped . I knew that and he wouldn't blame me or himself or get disappointed. He understood me

As he was kissing my neck, I started to relax and calm myself down. His right hand were on my back but I soon felt his left hand make it's way from the back to the front and slowly approaching my chest. When his hand wasn't even one inch away, I felt myself freeze and I pulled myself away from him. I spun around immediately and was facing him with my back as my hand was covering my chest.

I couldn't do it. Not now..

I closed my eyes and tried to control my breathing and my heartbeats. trying to come up with some kind of excuse to not ruin everything but still not going all the way. I couldn't do it..

I heard myself soon sob. I had no idea why but.. it was scary. All of it..

I soon felt JaeJoong hug me from the back. He kissed my shoulder before moving my right arm away from the chest. I didn't know what he was trying to do but I was so embarrassed because I just interrupted something beautiful and I didn't want him to look at me, not like this. I felt my sharp and determined arm about covering my chest so I felt him step about 1 feet away from me. His hand was soon holding my left hand and he squeezed it lightly

"Don't.. be afraid Yumi.. I won't.. hurt you" I heard him whisper

My right arm soon dropped down from my chest and I felt him approach me again. He kissed my neck from behind and his left hand let go of my hand and he grabbed the bikinis upper part and as he was kissing my shoulder, he took the bikini's thread around my neck, putting it back to it's place..

"I won't do anything if you don't want me to" He whispered and made me spin around and he took me into his arms and hugged me tightly

I soon hugged him back as well and was holding him close to me

"Thank you.. for understanding me" I whispered

I heard him chuckle as he kissed my shoulder again and pulled away, but was still holding me in his arms. He softly looked at me, studying every feature of my face and his index finger my cheek

"You're too precious to hurt. I'd rather break my own body than hurt you" He whispered

Afterwards I lied down inside the cave, he was resting onto me this time. And just like he did to me a couple of minutes ago I started to massage him. Unlike me I felt that his back was relaxed, soft and smooth. He was leaning his head forward, making it easier for me to massage him while listening to the music.

It was just like exploring something new. His body was amazing, making me a bit surprised since he really did have a nice body. His arm muscles was pretty big as well and his back, you could see that it was well trained and his broad shoulders made him look even more manly. . I started to massage his neck and I could hear him letting out a breath, he was enjoying this..

I started to get more curious and I felt myself being a bit more excited cause I wanted to explore his body. So with shaky hands, from the back I slowly passed his shoulders and slowly made my way down his chest. I could feel him trembling, not because of cold or anything but more like, he enjoyed it..

I caressed his chest smoothly and down to his stomach feelings his abs. He leaned his head backwards with his eyes closed. He looked satisfied

I smiled quietly and leaned forward and kissed him upside down. His kisses were easy and carefully, soft in other words as if he didn't want to scare me away.

After spending about 2 hours down in the hot springs JaeJoong said that we should get out of the water before we turn into raisins. We got out of the water and he got up first, he then pulled me up and waited for me as I went behind the screen to grab the towel. I wrapped it around my body and when I sneak peeked from the screen I saw him standing there, his upper body still bare as his face was facing the sky, with his eyes closed..

My heart once again started to beat faster and I felt my blood circulating like madness inside of me. I couldn't believe that this person belonged me and no one else. I loved him for his concern, his ways of taking care of me, his ways of understanding me, his ways of taking everything slow, so that I could be prepared..

he didn't want me to be afraid of him. He just wanted me to be close.. right?
I stepped outside the screen and walked towards him. He obviously heard me and smiled at me when i came out behind the screen
He grabbed his tee and we walked towards the cabin, hand in hand

"JaeJoong?"

"Hmm?"

"Are you angry with me?" I whispered slowly

"Angry? For what?"

"Because.. of.. me.. uhm.. earlier"

I suddenly felt him stop and he forced me to stop as well and he looked at me seriously

"Yumi, I respect you. I respect your decisions, your words and your actions. I understand that if you don't want to and aren't ready, that's fine. I just don't want you to be afraid of me. Cause.. there is nothing in the world that I would do to harm you.."

I swallowed hard

"I'm just.. trying to make you understand what I feel. How you make me feel.. that's all. To be close to you.. so close as anyone can be with the other, it's something special. You're special.."

He put his arms around my shoulders as we started to walk again towards the cabin again. I was right then. He wanted to make love cause he loved me . He wanted to make me understand how special I was. How special we were. To make love with anyone was like, giving themselves, to become one person together. To give yourself like that to someone, was like saying, It's you I want to be with.. And no one can take your place..

We entered the cabin as I was still a bit lost in my thoughts

"Do you want to take a shower before sleeping?" He asked softly

I nodded slowly, still into my thoughts..

He took me into the bedroom where I slowly went over to the closet and grabbed my night gown and underwear and he was watching me the entire time. As soon as I had entered the bathroom and locked myself inside, I sat down on the floor as I started to think about it again.

He was trying to make me understand right?

"I'm the ... only one.. he wants to be with.. right?" I whispered to myself

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~JaeJoong~

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I was terrified. Afraid that I might have hurt her in any kind of way when were down by the hotspring. She seemed so .. afraid when she stepped inside the bathroom, as if she was thinking hardly about something. My anxiety grew as I was worrying about if she was ok. I was hoping and thinking over and over that I didn't scare her but obviously.. I did since she was behaving a bit awkward.

I started to panic a bit as I was lightening the candles in the bedroom and I ran outside to the livingroom to turn on the music. I had to make her feel safe again, assuring her that I wouldn't do anything to hurt her..

I decided to take the shower outside down by the hotspring, since it was an outside shower. Since it was dark I knew that no one would see me so I grabbed some soap and body wash and hurried down and took quick shower. When i was finished I realized that I didn't bring any clothes so I wrapped the towel around me, leaving the swim pants right there , hanging so that they could dry as soon as the sun comes up in the morning. I hoped that she wasn't finished with the shower and that I would be able to get my clothes before she got outside.

As the music was playing I entered the bedroom. I closed the door behind and walked inside but to my surprise I didn't hear the sound of the shower. The lights were off which made me suspicious

"Yumi?"

I walked over to the bathroom, the lights but there was no one in there, except her clothes and bikini. I turned off the lights and shouted her name again

"Yumi?"

I spun around and suddenly I saw her standing by the window, looking outside with a towel wrapped around her

"Yumi? Gwenchana?" I asked

She spun around slowly and faced me. Her eyes were glittering in the dark . The candles that I had lightened earlier was doused off and the only light we had was the moonlight shining through the big windows

"Yumi? What's going on? are you ok?" I started to get even more worried

She then slowly approached me and when she stopped in front of me, I couldn't take my eyes off her cause her beauty had completely made me paralyzed. Her hands suddenly approached me, her hands caressing my stomach, making it's way up to my chest, to my shoulders and soon she wrapped her arms around my neck. She pulled me closer to her and she kissed me slowly and passionately
I wrapped my arms around her waist, still not understanding what was going on but I soon felt that she wasn't wearing anything under the towel. I instantly pulled away and looked at her. I now understood what she was trying to do..

"Yumi.. You don't .. have to.. make up to me because you didn't want to.. earlier!" I said worriedly

She shook her head

"I love you" She whispered

I stared at her

With her arms still locked around my neck she backed slowly onto the bed, dragging me along. She then unlocked her arms around my neck and took my hand instead, she was slowly moving onto the bed. She rested her head on the pillows and was dragging me along, and I was right now lying on top of her

"Yumi.. I don't want you to do anything that you will regret. I understand if you're not ready and I understand if you're feeling guilty about earlier but please.. don't force yourself to do something you don't feel comfortable with" I said once again trying to persuade her while my heart was beating like crazy, trying to resist the desire of making love to her

She shook her head

"You're the only one I want to be with.."

She pulled me closer to her and she started to kiss me passionately. I was slowly adjusting myself to the situation, and I felt her kisses becoming more and more fierce. After a few minutes I had to pull away so that both of us could breathe

"Make love to me Jae.."

I looked at her, trying to understand what she was saying

"I want to be with you.."

The desire of wanting to make love to her grew but my brain was saying something else

"I can't.. not if you're feeling guilty about what happened earlier and that you're trying to make it up to me.. Yumi... I can wait.."

She caressed my cheek softly

"What you said earlier changed my mind. I finally understand what you were trying to say earlier.. and I want you to know.. As much as you want to be with me.. and tell me how much you love me, I'm feeling the same.. I love you. I want to be close to you as any human being can be with another.. Make love to me" She whispered

For a few minutes it was completely silent but then she took my lips with her own and I was now sure that she meant every word that she said

I placed my right hand under her back, pulled her closer to me as the feelings inside of us grew, our kisses becoming more and more intense..

My heart was beating like mad and I didn't know any way to stop it. I felt her hand soon slide down to my chest and her hand stopped where my heart was beating..
She pulled away from our kiss and looked at me

"You're.. shaking..." She whispered

I smiled at her as I caressed her cheek

"This is what you're doing to me everyday" I whispered

"Doing what?"

"Driving me crazy..."