~Yumi~

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I didn't know what to expect when I had called Yunho over in order to tell him the truth. I knew that he was closest to JaeJoong as well and I felt a bit more.. secure being around him. He was after all.. someone I depended on, someone I dearly cherished cause he had done so much for me..

He was staring blankly a head, his face facing me but his eyes.. They just stared into the empty space in front of me. I didn't dare to say anything and my heartbeats increased..

I started to get even more afraid of the silence between us cause he hadn't said anything for about 5 minutes
With shaky hands I brought them to his face, carefully lifting his face up in order to look him in the eyes

"Yunho...please... say something" I whispered

It was like his eyes came alive as he heard my voice and he looked up. I soon saw the tear fall down on his cheek, he didn't even blink but I guess the tear spoke for itself..

With shaky hands and fingers, I wiped it away with my index finger. I didn't dare to say anything but I sobbed myself while wiping his tears away

"You have.. to tell JaeJoong.." He whispered, his voice sounded like his soul had disappeared

I faced him again and tried to not loose the control over my tears and self control

"You have to tell him.." Yunho whispered again

He suddenly grabbed my hands and held onto my wrist, softly and carefully. i felt his warmth warming up my cold hands

"You have... to" He quieten

"I know.."

Yunho gathered his strength and somehow got himself up and he sat down on the couch right next to me

"Otoke?" I whispered

Yunho didn't answer

"He's.. gonna be so .. heartbroken.." I sobbed as I brought my shaky hands to my face and covered my face in frustration

"I just.. "

"How did this happen..." Yunho asked but it sounded like he was talking to himself

"It's.. not right..." Yunho stuttered

"I've had this illness.. for a couple of years now.. I never thought they could.. turn me.. into a blind person" I whispered

The next thing I know was that I was in Yunho's arms. He was holding onto me tightly as I heard him sob. I lost the self control of mine and I burst out into another round of tears and couldn't help but cry even more..

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~JaeJoong~

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"Hyung.. Have you seen Yunho lately?"

I looked up to see Changmin taking the seat in front of me as I was sitting in the library

I shook my head

"He's.. like.. gone. I can't.. reach him and if I do, he just says that he's not in the mood of talking .." Changmin said

"Do you think something happened?" I asked slowly

"It must have"

Yoochun took the seat right next to me and looked at us. Junsu soon arrived as well and sat down in front of Yoochun..

"Something must have happened.." Yoochun said

"How's .. Yumi?" Junsu asked

I shook my head

"She's.. the same..No change" I said and looked down on the books

"Do you think there's a connection?" Changmin suddenly asked

"What do you mean?" I asked

All of them looked at me

"I mean I have never thought about it before.. but the past days, Yunho suddenly turned weird. Yumi has been weird for a long time. Do you think there's a connection?" Yoochun asked

I started to feel the fear of separation grow inside of me as the light was slowly being switched on inside my head

"You're.. not talking about.. Yunho liking Yumi right?" I stuttered

"Yah yah... We shouldn't jump to any conclusions like that" Junsu said

"But still.. it's weird.. I mean he...No.. he's hyung's friend.. That's not even possible.." Changmin said

"But still.. I mean in love anything's possible" Yoochun said

"HYUNG!" Changmin said

"It's not what you think it is.."

All four of us looked up to see a tired Yunho. Exhausted, pale, swollen eyes and just. . tired

He looked at me

"Hyung"

He faced me

"You have a message.." Yunho said slowly

"Message?" I asked and stood up slowly

"A letter in fact.."

Suddenly I could hear the rain outside. Great.. rain.. It was shattering against the windows and you could hear it so clearly since the entire library was quiet

"What do you mean?" I asked

He sighed

I saw a tear stroll down his face

"Yumi told me to tell you that you have a letter only.. and that you would know where to find it.." his voice broke

"Yunho.. you're scaring us.." Yoochun said and stood up

Yunho sighed

"Hyung.. go.. now.. It's important"

I didn't care about any further explanation. I grabbed my jacket and left the books, the bag, everything behind as I ran outside the library and outside where the rain was falling. I could hear the thunder yelling aggressively just like my heart were at the moment..

A letter waiting for me?

i didn't think about it anymore since all I knew that somewhere inside of me, something was definitely wrong. My instincts told me that this was the reason for Yumi's weird act and Yunho's suddenly awkward behavior..

I arrived at the stone down by the river as the rain was still pouring. I knew Yumi wouldn't be here since she left after the class had ended, her mom came and picked her up. She didn't give me an explanation where she was going but she told me that she would call me tonight. And i didn't want to seem like a stalker so I decided to let it pass..

I flew down where the letter was waiting for me and I didn't care if there was anyone nearby. I don't think anyone was because after all it was raining heavily..

I was wet, the clothes were sticking onto my skin, the hair was covering my eyes and I felt my hands getting cold. But I was still a bit warm.

The feeling of that something was wrong with Yumi kept driving me forward and I couldn't help.. but shake a little bit more.. I didn't know what to expect but to judge by Yunho's sad face, his tears.. Something is wrong..

I finally saw the letter in the bag and I grabbed it, put the stone back and I stood up. I didn't care if I was standing in the rain.. I had to know and I couldn't wait until I got home to read it. I had to read it now.. or else.. it felt like I would loose something

I unfolded the letter in a hurry and with shaky hands I pulled it closer..

"Dear ...

I'm sorry JaeJoong.. That I haven't been fair to you lately. But I want you to know that I have my reasons.

I .. . have a secret. I've been thinking about it a lot lately, trying to figure out.. the best way to explain it.. to tell you.. but it hasn't been the easiest. It's been hard and I still don't know how to .. say it to you

Forgive me for being a coward for telling you through this letter but.. I feel more safe and comfortable with writing this than.. saying it straight to you personally.

JaeJoong ah~~

I.. have an illness .. called Retinitis pigmentosa. An illness that causes me to not see so well. My eyes have become worse.. and I have a hard time to adjust myself to see in the dark and the broad day light. I have black spots growing inside my eye, causing my left eye to almost be blind. I don't know for how long my right eye are going to keep it up but.. it's slowly getting worse.. and I don't know how much .. time I have until I'm totally blind. There's no cure..

JaeJoong, I'm sorry for not telling you earlier..

This is my reason for acting weird the past few days

JaeJoong ah~~ Mianhe

From ... With Love.."

I stared at the letter in my hands. I couldn't breathe, feel my hands due to the coldness or my leg. The body couldn't feel anything. The only thing.. I could feel at the moment was my heart. It wasn't warm.

It was ice cold..

I also realized the I had been holding onto the letter so hard that it was totally ruined. Ruined by the rain and ruined by my hard grip around it..

This was also the first time I ever.. felt that I didn't want to keep one of her letters.
I don't know if you could see the tears on my cheeks falling due to the rain but I was crying

I ripped the letter into pieces as I fell down on my knees and covered my face.. in frustration .. My heart wasn't at ease anymore. It felt like the entire world had become dark because of the letter..

One stupid letter..

My Yumi ~~

She's.. going blind....

I shook my head as the thought kept running inside my head, the picture of her words written down on the letter..

She is.. really going blind..