~Yumi~

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When I woke up in the morning, the first thing I did was to open my eyes. I let out a sigh of relief when I saw everything clearly, except from the black spots that was preventing me from seeing everything but besides that, I could see..

I sat up immediately and the first thing I did was to grab the letter that was on the night desk. I opened the letter slowly and started to read ..

"Dear ..

I guess you like it Seoul huh? Is it hard to adjust yourself? How's your school?
I bet a lot of people wanted to get to know you right ?

There's so much I've been thinking about lately that I don't even know what to do..
My shoulders are feeling heavy because of the burdens.. that I have..

Not good right ?
The weather is really becoming warmer and warmer. Are you out and enjoying yourself? I am.. I like the sun but I'm just sad .. I want to sit in the forest and listen to the peaceful silence at the countryside..
Are you going back soon?

I want it to be vacation so that I can go back. This is special but it doesn't have the same feel like when we were writing to each other at the countryside.. Somehow .. I miss that. But I'm also happy that you're here now.. Cause now, I can write even more and more..

You won't get burdened because of my letters right ? =)

I see.. How is he? Is he .. nice to you?
Seems like you like him a lot.. I feel a bit jealous now.. I don't like sharing you with.. other guys.. but I can't prevent you from finding happiness.. cause that would make me into a very bad person.. don't you think?

Be happy~

From ... With Love"

My heart got even heavier because of his words, not that I was worrying about my health at the moment but just through his words, i can feel.. somehow sense that he wasn't feeling ok.. Something was definitely wrong..

I stared at the letter for a moment before I decided to walk over to the desk. When I reread the sentence about him.. not liking sharing me with other guys.. What did he mean by that?

He thought I was going to leave him because I found myself liking JaeJoong a bit ?
How can he even think such nonsense?
I might like JaeJoong but.. the feelings for him is stronger and I.. need him.. I need him more than he knows..

I suddenly felt a desire to see him. To let him hug me.. and to.. ask him if we could meet..

It suddenly hit me that I have never .. ever.. not even once thought about seeing him, meeting him in real life.. But now.. I was having second thoughts.. With this health of mine, the eyes slowly getting.. worse.. I wonder if it was right .. if I could really.. ask him to let us meet just once.. Would.. he agree?

But then again, if I was selfish and wanted to see him, Wouldn't that let me ending up, twisting around in pain? Cause I knew that once I have met him, seen him, I wouldn't want to look away and the thought of my eyes someday soon getting blind, that I wasn't able to look at him, wouldn't that be.. very sad? and painful?

I don't know if I could even let myself to do something such painful to my heart. But at the same time I should.. cherish the time right? Who knows what will happen in the future? All I could do now was to pray that the treatment would slow it down so that I could keep my sight just a little bit longer..

I looked down on my pink letter..

With tears in my eyes, with the sound of my heartbeat, with my trembling fingers I soon found myself writing...

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~JaeJOong~

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I was sitting by the schooldesk, as the teacher was speaking , not knowing that almost half of the class was not paying any attention.
This morning when I had went to the place to get her letter, I didn't find any. I think I had spent at least 20 minutes, just staring at the empty spot under the stone without thinking. All I did think was.. Where was the letter?

I had started to get worried and frustrated. I even sat there waited for her to come, the letter to arrive but there was no sign of someone coming to put a letter under the stone.. So in the end, in order to not be late for class, I forced.. practically Dragged myself away from there..

But it wasn't easy to sit in the class and concentrate either cause all I could think about was the letter. Why.. hadn't she written ?
Did I write.. something wrong.. in the previous letter ?
I shook my head in frustration as I looked down on my notepad..

I hated school. It was taking so much time of my life . I hated stuff like this. Mandatory stuff.. Stuff that you have to do in order to get through the day.. The anxiety kept growing as the time were passing and finally when the teacher called the class being dismissed I grabbed my books and threw it in the bag and got out..

As soon as I stepped outside it felt like all the air was coming towards me, the feeling of freedom..
But yet, I couldn't leave school..
I had 1 more class to go..

"Hey.. dude.. you're alright?"

I recognized the voice of Yunho and soon the guys were right behind me as we were walking down the hall

"Hyung, something troubling you?" Changmin asked

I shook my head

"Not really.. I'm.. fine" I said a bit avoiding

The guys didn't say anything else and soon I heard Yoochun letting out a sigh

"Why are you sighing?" Junsu asked

"Girls are coming this way.. I'm tired today but the hyper girl Tiff is coming this way" Yoochun chuckled

"Oh.. "

I looked up and just like Yoochun had said, she was really coming this way with Yuri next to her. She was really the last person on earth that I wanted to see now

"Hey, let's go this way" Yunho suggested

He suddenly dragged me with him and turned right and I noticed that the rest of the members were just right behind me.

We followed Yunho to the bench behind the school and I sat down a bit confused

"Why.. did we go this way?" I asked

Yunho smiled

"Hey.. Hyung.. Mianhe" Changmin said

I looked at him and I saw that Junsu and Yoochun were nodding in agreement as well

"What for?" I said a bit confused

Both of them rolled their eyes..

"For.. pushing you. We didn't know.. we were thinking like Yunho and didn't know that you were feeling burdened by this but at least.. now we know.. We're really sorry" Changmin said

I chuckled

"It's alright.. It's not a bid deal so don't worry.. Just.. don't do it again and I'm fine" I laughed

We all high fived each other

"Hey.. isn't that Yumi?" Junsu asked

I looked up and looked at the direction where he was pointing. Just like Yoochun said I recognized Yumi's long hair and soon I saw that it was her.

"She looks.. a bit down.. don't you think?" Yunho asked

"Mollah.. do you think something happened?" I asked and looked at the others

"I don't know but what I do know is that if we don't leave now, we will be late for class" Junsu said

The guys started to make their way back but I was still standing at the same spot. I was looking at Yumi and I don't know why I was standing there watching her but I felt paralyzed and I started to worry. What for? I don't know..

"JaeJoong? You're coming?" Yunho asked

"You guys.. go first.. I'll just.. " I said a bit away and started to make my way to Yumi

Yunho shrugged and went back to school and I started slowly to approach Yumi.
I don't know if she was acting like she didn't hear me or anything cause when I was close enough to even touch her, she still didn't show any signs of knowing that I was there

"Yumi?"

She jumped up out of fear and spun around

She let out a sigh of relief when she saw that it was me but I couldn't help but to look at her sadly. I could easily tell that she had been crying but I didn't know the reason. Through her eyes and facial expression, she must have been really really sad.. cause something was obviously making her feeling down..

"Oh.. JaeJoong.." She whispered hoarse

I walked towards her and wiped away the tear that wanted to fall down her cheek

"hey hey~ .. why are you crying?" I whispered softly

She didn't react but she was letting me wiping away her tears..

"Did something happen?" I asked

It didn't feel weird while asking her if something was wrong since we had somehow just met but still, the connection between us felt like we had known each other for ages..

She looked up ..

"Is it.. ok if.. I ask you to just.. hug me.. for a few minutes?" She whispered

I don't know what happened cause in the next second, without hesitating I dropped my bag down onto the ground and I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her into my embrace..