~JaeJoong~

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"Honey?"

"Honey?"

I felt someone touching my hair carefully, slightly caressing it . A feeling of a mother's love.. something very similar to that. I opened my eyes slowly and just like I thought, it was her..

I sat up slowly and looked around. i rubbed my eyes and saw that I had probably fallen asleep while watching the variety show. Although, a variety show, you're suppose to laugh but I guess I didn't..

I looked around , looking for Yumi but somehow, i didn't find her anywhere..
I sat up slowly and looked at mom who was waiting for me to say something..

"Mom.. where is she?" I asked and looked at her

"Who?"

"Yumi.." I said and stood up

I walked out of the livingroom and into the kitchen but I just saw dad putting all the newspapers and such into the trashcan. I walked out of the kitchen and ran to the front door and I saw that her shoes were gone..
Did she leave.. while I was asleep?

"Mom?!" I shouted

"Yes?"

Mom was right behind me and I spun around and faced her

"Mom, when did you guys come home?"

"We've been home for 2 hours already"

"2 HOURS?!?!?" I gasped

Mom nodded

"Is something wrong? You seem so.. devastated for some reason" Mom said slowly

I saw that the clock was 6 pm. I must have fallen asleep around 2 or 4 pm.. but still.. I then remembered that we got back to my house around lunchtime. And then she had fallen asleep. I had made us some tea and then took care of her and then sat down in the livingroom to watch the show but I had then fallen asleep..

She must have left around 3 pm or something..
Why did she leave?

"JaeJoong? Who's Yumi?"

I looked up to see mom's eyes shine a bit. She really seemed curious..

I shrugged and went back into the livingroom. A bit annoyed that she left without saying anything.. I thought.. she was going to stay.. and not leave like that.. I felt somehow. . ditched..

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~Yumi~

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The next day in school I was walking down the hallway in school, everyone seemed to be busy, running around to get time into their classrooms in order to not be late but I was for some reason just taking it easy..

I soon spotted JaeJoong a bit ahead with Yunho and Junsu and I smiled widely. Seems like Yunho had seen me and he waved at me happily but JaeJoong just looked up. His eyes were somehow waiting and watching me carefully. The gaze seemed very.. careful.. and.. a bit.. upset?

I waved at him but I lowered my hand as soon as I saw him look at another direction. It felt totally awkward when he did that and I don't think I need someone to tell me that he was upset. But what for?

2 days passed and I didn't hear anything from him. He refused to say hi in school and he avoided me. Neither did it help when I said hi or greeted him and I don't know what was going on. I also noticed that he was staying away from Tiffany and the girls as well but it wasn't easy cause they were always hanging around him..

I on the other hand, spent my days down by the Han River, as usual. I was so happy that the school were close to the River cause it felt even more greater to have somewhere to go..
I had waited several days for 'His' letters as well but there was no sign of letters. And seemed like he hasn't been there to pick my letters up cause everytime I went there to put my letters under the stone I saw my own letters still waiting for him to get them..

I started to worry. He said that he wasn't feeling good in the previous letter.. but that didn't mean that he was.. sad or depressed right? I mean everything's alright with him.. right?

I sighed heavily as I was making me way home, another day where I received cold expressions and such from JaeJoong. Yunho were always greeting me happily but JaeJoong.. just looked away..

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~~JaeJoong~

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I was lying on my bed, staring up in the ceiling, thinking about why she left without saying anything. I know that I was acting childish for not greeting her, looking at her and avoiding her..

Seems like the time in school , I spent it mostly on avoiding Tiffany and the girls and also Yumi. Am I ridiculous or what?
I was upset with Yumi cause it felt like.. she didn't trust me enough to stay. On the other hand, i can't really demand that from her but.. it's just that.. I felt so special around her that I somehow assumed that everything would be ok with us..

But when she had left without leaving a letter, a note or anything.. I felt so disappointed and upset. Upset that she had left without a word and upset with myself since I had fallen asleep..

I wanted to spend more time with her cause it felt.. right.. I felt good around her.. and I was feeling free.. otherwise.. the only times when I could be myself was when I was writing letters to 'Her'

Suddenly I instantly flew up from my bed and realized that I had forgotten her completely the past few days..I got out of bed and ran to my desk and pulled out a blue paper and started to write my response to the previous letter of hers..

Oh my, she must have been worried or thinking that I was angry with her for not responding her letters. How could I be so selfish and stubborn? FORGETTING HER?!

I wrote "Mianhe" at least 100 times I think before I finally folded the letter and put it inside my bag and went downstairs. Mom and dad didn't say much when I left, just told me to not stay out too late and then I got into the car and speeded all the way down to the Han River. I ran towards the Stone in the evening, the coldness and the dark surrounding me..

WheN I had assured myself that no one was there I lifted the flat stone and I saw a bunch of letters.. An ocean of guilt started to form inside my chest and I couldn't help but feel a bit sad and angry with myself .. I had forgotten her..

I grabbed the bunch of letters and put my own letter under the stone. I packed the letters down inside my bag and put the stone back. I stood up and looked around but there was not a single soul nearby..

So my feet started to move automatically down the river. I think that I had to walk down the river. I don't know why but it just felt that I should.. do that since.. something.. was trying to make me go this way. And that I would somehow regret if I didn't go..

Then I heard the sound of someone swinging and sobbing. I followed the sound with my eyes and soon I recognized her sitting on the same swing, her head facing the sandbox while her legs were lightly pushing her forward and backwards on the swing..

"Yumi~~"

She reacted and looked up and I felt my heart weakened by the face of hers. She looked.. hurt and she was in pain. No doubt..
Not even this time, Not even this once I could ignore the fact that I had to be there for her. I started to walk towards her as she slowly stood up

even this time, I automatically took her in my arms and she hugged me tightly
She kept crying onto my shoulder and I started to feel even more guilty for being angry with her the past few days. Something was definitely wrong with her.. I don't know what but.. she looked like she had gone through something horrible..

I pulled away from her carefully and looked into her eyes as she looked back at me..
Or she wasn't.. really looking back at me.. Her face were directed to me but.. her eyes were sometimes looking at me and then they just looked somewhere else..

"Yumi~?" I asked slowly

She wiped away her tears and then I saw her eyes, after a few minutes looking at me as if she was taking a picture with her eyes

"What's wrong?" I asked softly

She shook her head

"Are you.. angry with me JaeJoong?" She asked with her hoarse voice

I then started to think about. Why was I even angry? She didn't have any duties towards me about that she HAS to leave a message or anything. Why was I angry with her? HOW COULD I BE ANGRY WITH HER?! She has never been angry with me and she has never done anything wrong !

I sighed heavily, frustrated since I knew that I had been unfair

I took her slowly into my arms again and hugged her close to me.

"I'm so sorry.. I was overreacting.. I was.." I whispered

"Wae? Why were you angry?"

I sighed

"I felt so weird being around you.. when you just left like that without waking me up.. and for not leaving a message.. I just... I don't know.. I'm weird.. I'm.. I just.. I don't know.. I" I started to say things that were unnecessary and started to babble but then she pulled away from me

"mwoh? But I did leave.. a message.. I wrote a letter and put it on the table.." She whispered

"Mwoh?"

She nodded

"I left a letter on the table right in front of you before I left just so that you knew that I had left.." She said

I realized even more how wrong I had been and it surely didn't help my feelings

I closed my eyes to calm down and then I opened my eyes. I then out of nowhere leaned forward and kissed her forehead and took her in my arms.

"Mianhe~~"

Don't ask me why i did that but I knew that I wasn't thinking it through. The actions didn't come from the brain.. My heart had definitely taken over my actions and my body and right now, I was acting out all the things that my heart wanted to do..