Year 14 May
18 years of loving you, and the one year it mattered.
Year 14- May
"Sehun! Go grab the door!" Luhan shouted at the younger whilst making breakfast and settling Mei in her high chair
"Sure baby" Sehun kissed the side of Luhans head before making his way to the door
He could already hear Youngdae's voice not to mention Chen and Xiumin bickering AND Mindae crying her eyes out
It was going to be a great day
"Hey guys" Sehun sighed ushering the now quite large Kim family into the dinning room
"Min, Youndae will be fine on the coasters okay? I swear"
"What if he gets hurt Dae? What then? I can't risk it!"
"You can trust him with me!"
"What about that time he fell off the swing when you took him to the park?"
"That was a one time thing!!! We were in Uni then!!"
"Oh that's a great excuse- Uni"
"SHUT THE UP!" Sehun hissed glaring at both of them
"No swearing infront of the kids!!" The pair said in unison
"I don't give, I'm trying to have breakfast with my family SO ZIP IT, Chen you gotta be more responsible I mean c'mon but Min just give him some slack he wants Youngdae to have a good time!"
"Baby you're so good with relationships" Luhan cooed coming to sit next to his husband
"Cooties" Chen shuddered
"Agreed" Minseok nodded burying his face into Chen's chest
"You're the people with cooties" Luhan pouted
"Chanyeol and Baekhyun are going to meet us there"
"How come?"
"They're going to the cemetery first"
----
The morning was silent for the Park family as they drove, a solem feeling had been cast over Baekhyun as he anxiously glanced over at Chanyeol
Those memories all come back too fast
The fire, the smoke the ruins of Chanyeol's childhood home.
Baekhyun remembers every expression on Chanyeol's face that day
He remembers the charred body of his sister fighting for her life
And he remembers Chanyeol not being ready to say goodbye
The shouting the kicking
The violence
Shaking with Agony
With loss
Strong hands
We're going to need you Chanyeol
We need you to stay
All those agonising months where Chanyeol was depressed
Not that Baekhyun blamed him at all
He just can't shake the memories of him going out late, of him never knowing where he was
How he always went to Kris
It stung, why would Chanyeol go to Kris for support when he had himself right there ready to help
Of course Chanyeol ignored him
Leaving him with his sisters daughter
And Baekhyun understood, he really did but he was tired of all the lonely nights, all the heartache wondering where Chanyeol was or what he was doing, and he was exhausted from trying it seemed impossible to fix
What happens in underneath people's views- no one knew of Chanyeol's suffering and no one knew of Baekhyun's aching heart.
The day he brought it up almost destroyed them, he had tried feebly a few times before but he was always shut down fast.
But this time Baekhyun swore it would be different, he was going to take charge no matter how much Chanyeol was hurting, it wasn't an opportunity or an excuse for avoiding responsibility.
Now he looks at Chanyeol carefully, studying him as he drives, looking for the firey, angry soul that Baekhyun knows rages deep inside his heart under the selflessness and kindness there burns selfishness and hatred
But mostly Baekhyun knows Chanyeol is sad, riddled with grief no amount of support and love can fix.
There will always be a hole, and whenever Baekhyun atempts to mend that hole, it only grows bigger, so he stopped trying.
What Baekhyun can't remember is when Chanyeol came back to him, when he stayed home every night to read Dara a bedtime story when he stopped leaning on Kris and looked to Baekhyun for support.
He can't remember when it got better, it just happened.
Which is why he's so glad he didn't give up on him, after so many times of contemplating leaving and so many times of deciding to give up
He was so glad he didn't
The wound in Chanyeol's mind and heart would never completely heal Baekhyun accepted that, he himself had a internal and raging grief for the loss.
But what he learned was that you just have to keep going tumbling along through life not knowing what will hit you and how bad it will hit you
It's the beauty of life, everyone's lost and will always be lost, everyone has what if's, and something's are unexpected but they shape us as people and allow us to grow no matter how bad it seems at the time.
And nobody will ever stop growing- especially Chanyeol.
Baekhyun loves Chanyeol, with all his heart, he always will
He doesn't know if they'll be together forever because even fairy tales can have an unhappy ending
Which makes the prospect of real life even more pessimistic
But right now in this very moment
Byun Baekhyun loves Park Chanyeol
And he will never forget how much
Not now, not ever
So now as they stand over his family's grave, Chanyeol isn't afraid to cry when he places down flowers gently.
Because he knows the one person whose always there through the hurricane of life, the one person who will always be there no matter what
He doesn't know whether he will want Baekhyun forever
But right now he does want Baekhyun
And he will never forget how much
"C'mon Baek... Lets go, we don't want to keep the others waiting"
A/N
Very short... But it's all I have right now -.-
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