It was embarrassing to admit that he was falling in love with Mingyu. Love is such a wimpy feeling, a feeling concerned with all those sappy inner passions that people don’t often reveal to others.

But he was falling in love. He was sure of it. He was new to that feeling of being so crazy about another person, but somehow, he just knew that what he was feeling for Mingyu was that thing people called love. He had only known Mingyu for a few months (was that even enough time to fall in love?), but in those few months he developed this passion and adoration for Mingyu that he could not articulate properly. He just loved him. He loved his tall, handsome, caring, lighthearted, religious, After-School-obsessed, conservative, touchy, funny, tea-loving and perfect-in-every-way Mingyu.

Wonwoo had been listening to that After School album that Mingyu had given him when he realized that he was in love. Track 12 of the album. A song named “When I Fall.”

It was his favorite song in the album, which was strange considering he usually enjoyed the more hardcore, hip-hop-based songs. This, however, was a mellow song about falling in love, and something about it moved him.

There’s something about music that can touch at your soul in ways that words cannot, and that song did that for Wonwoo. It tugged at his heartstrings and so perfectly represented his feelings for Mingyu. The lyrics just put language to what he was feeling, and made him consider for the first time that it was love.

Wonwoo now had this overwhelming urge to just keep listening to that song. To close his eyes and imagine Mingyu as the music seeped through his body for hours and hours. It was hard to do in the social situation that he was in: on this trip with his friends who were going to celebrate his birthday. It was not that he did not appreciate their efforts or that he did not like the trip; it's just that he just felt this bliss when he remembered his feelings for Mingyu through that song, and he wanted to stay in that zone forever and ever.

-

They did not only celebrate Wonwoo’s birthday the following day, but they also surprised Jin by celebrating hers as well. It was months late, but she was still so touched by it. Sena had apparently told Wonwoo and Seokmin about it before the trip, and all three of them had planned to surprise her.

She received gifts from the three of them as well, but the gift that surprised her most was a hoodie with a snowflake on it. “It’s to match your snowflake necklace,” Sena said with a wink, making Jin blush. Jin did not even know that Sena knew about that, let alone understand how much she appreciated it.

And thus, the trip was over a day later. The four of them would always remember it and were sad to pack up and get on that bus back to Seoul, where they would have to go back to campus and face the drudgery of studies and homework and papers and exams.

Jin felt closer to all of them now, for they got over all of the things that kept them apart. All of the drama and emotions were put to the side, and the tense atmosphere that had existed between them had disappeared completely.

When she climbed on that bus back to Seoul, reality hit her and she remembered that she had people to face.

The police had concluded that there was ample evidence against Seungcheol, and so he was imprisoned temporarily, though still not declared guilty, as he had claimed that the accusation was false. A small trial needed to be held, in which Sena had to state her case in front of Seungcheol, and Seungcheol had to respond to all of the allegations himself.

It made Sena quite nervous that she had to do this, but Mingyu had apparently sent her calming messages telling her not to worry because the evidence against him was too much for him to deny.

Jin also had to face Vernon. He cut contact with her ever since that text, and she hated that. She longed to know where she stood with him, and the fact he was being evasive distressed her.

She was so anxious, that upon their arrival at campus at midday, she decided to go find him immediately.

Sena took her luggage back to their room, and Jin walked with Seokmin back to his building.

“Do you think he’s mad?” Seokmin asked Jin.

Jin shrugged.

“If he is mad at you for helping imprison the guy who your best friend, then he’s trash, to be honest,” Seokmin told her. He had this venom in his voice that was so uncharacteristic of him. Jin could not tell if that venom was directed at Seungcheol or at Vernon or both.

“I think he’s just shocked,” Jin defended.

Seokmin fell quiet, and there was an awkward silence between them. He then looked at her and said: “forget everything I said about me having feelings for you, okay?”

Jin did not know how to respond to that.

“I don’t want it to ruin my relationship with you,” he added. “Although it’s not ideal, I really am satisfied being your friend. And I can’t help but feel like everything that happened between us will jeopardize my original relationship with you. So please, just forget it, okay? Let’s be close friends like before? Exactly like before…”

 She nodded in agreement and he smiled at her.

“Alright then, let’s go get your man with nice hair,” Seokmin said, starting to walk a little faster.

-

Seokmin wished her luck and went into his room.

With a deep breath and nervous thoughts, she knocked on Vernon’s door.

It was Vernon who opened the door. He looked slightly startled to see her, but he let her in nonetheless by opening the door wider and signaling her inside. He was not happy to see her though; that was clear enough.

“He didn’t do it,” was the first thing that came out of Vernon’s mouth.

“He did,” Jin replied. That much at least, she was certain of.

She noticed that Chan was in the room, sitting on the bed with his phone. He stopped focusing on his phone and listened in on the conversation.

“Your friend is a , okay?” Vernon said with a serious look in his eyes that she had never seen from him. She was almost shocked to see him like that. She had seen him happy, quirky, confident, cheeky, and even sad. But never was he mad in front of her the way he seemed now.

“Stop it,” Jin told him, frowning in his direction, “you don’t know what she’s been through.”

“And you don’t know what Seungcheol’s been through,” Vernon retorted. “Now he’s under police custody while your friend runs free after ruining his life…”

“He did it, Vernon," Jin attested, "I know he’s a good friend to you, and I know you don’t know Sena enough to believe her. But can you believe me? I had conversations with him that make it so clear that he did it.”

“Seungcheol says stupid and suspicious all of the time. He studies neurosis for crying out loud, and people who go into that field all have unique mindsets,” Vernon defended.

“So are you saying that he absolutely could not have done it?” Jin asked him. It was news to her that Seungcheol was characteristically peculiar, but even that could not make her reconsider anything about him.

“He's not a bad person,” Vernon replied gravely.

“Well you’re wrong,” Jin replied to him.

“Are you saying that Sena is an absolute angel who would never do something like this?”

“Do what? Falsely accuse someone of her?”

“Yes.”

“The police have enough evidence…”

“To say he had with her? Yeah sure, they had . But it wasn’t .”

“He physically hurt her, Vernon,” Jin said.

“Probably because she liked it rough,” Vernon claimed.

Jin frowned and shook her head: “Stop trying to defend him…”

“It’s the truth.”

“It’s not. She would never falsely report someone and ruin their life.”

“Oh yes she would.”

“You don’t even know her.”

“I think I know all I need to know about her from your diary. She’s a selfish and you think so too; don’t deny it. You just never called her a because you’re too nice.”

Jin’s narrowed her eyes and frowned. It was true that Vernon had read her diary in a time when she was jealous and hateful of her best friend, but the fact he had such a negative impression of her because of it was just… wrong. “Sena is my best friend,” Jin told him, “and you have no right to say that about her.”

“I am, and I will. She’s a .”

Jin turned around to leave. She did not want to hear anymore of this.

He grabbed her wrist before she could go, and said, “tell her to withdraw her accusation.” Her jaw dropped, surprised he would even ask her to do something like that.

She pulled her wrist away from his grip and turned around to leave again, but he grabbed her wrist again before she could.

“Leave me alone,” Jin told him, trying to break free of his grip.

“Just answer me this: what makes you so sure that it was him?”

Jin decided to answer that question for Vernon, because as much as she despised everything that he was saying about Sena, she wanted him to start believing her. She did not want to walk away from him like this; she wanted to give him a chance to know the truth and to accept that Seungcheol was the evil person that Vernon was so sure he was not.

“Well, apart from the fact that my best friend made that accusation and she would never lie about it, there’s also how he came up to me suspiciously saying things like ‘I know that you know’ and ‘someone’s going to get punished for it.’ He also me and rubbed my thigh. There’s also how he made me go with him to a secluded part of campus, took of his shirt, grabbed me tightly, and asked me to ‘play’ with him.”

Vernon looked surprised to hear what she was saying, but he was still in denial. “You probably just took it that way, but he didn’t mean it like that. He was just being eccentric like he always is. Just playing around with you all those times. He would never be ual with a girl if she did not let him…”

“Why don’t you just believe me?” Jin asked him, wishing dearly that he would. She hated fighting with him.

“It’s not a matter of believing you,” Vernon replied. “It’s a matter of believing that .”

Jin’s mouth hung open at what he had called Sena. At this point Jin could no longer take it. All of Vernon’s allure, in that one moment, faded away. It was as if there was this switch in her heart, and she went from liking him to disliking him in an instant. She turned around to leave for real this time, and when he grabbed her she did not stop. She pulled her hand away from him violently almost. And he reacted with equal fervor and stood in front of the door so she wouldn’t leave.

"Talk to me," Vernon said.

“Step away,” she ordered. Her breath was heavy and her body was tense. She was so… angry and sad at the same time. She was so tempted to push him away herself.

“Why are you in denial about your friend?” Vernon asked her, more calmly.

“Why are you in denial about yours?” Jin retorted.

“You’re accusing him of being a !”

“You’re accusing Sena of being …” Jin did not finish the sentence.

“What? A ty ? A lying ?”

Every insult that he directed at Sena made her cringe. At this point, she could not longer stand it. She used all of her force to push him to the side, but he wouldn’t budge from in front of the door. She felt like she was about to cry of frustration, when a soft voice from behind her startled her.

“Can I say something to both of you?” came Chan’s gentle and reluctant voice from behind her, alarming her. She had completely forgotten that he was there and witnessing this entire conversation.

“What do you want?” Vernon asked him.

“I’m sorry to interrupt,” Chan said politely, “but I figured it’s time to come clean.”

Chan looked nervous and jittery as Jin turned to face him to see what he wanted to say.

“Do you remember when you were drunk and passed out?” he asked her, “Vernon and Seungcheol had to carry you up here. Well, Vernon had carried you up and then went back down to pay for the taxi, and so Seungcheol was left alone with you in this room.” Chan paused and looked at the floor, embarrassed.

Jin dreaded what it was that he would say after…

“He was touching her with his hands,” Chan directed the words at Vernon, “very inappropriately. I walked in and saw it... accidentally.”

Vernon froze. Jin felt like she wanted to disappear.

Chan bowed to Jin, “I’m sorry for not telling you earlier, but he said that if I did, he would beat me.” He stood upright and turned to Vernon: “you should believe her, hyung.”

“Wait, touching her how?” Vernon asked again just to clarify, still seemingly in denial.

Chan demonstrated by pointing to his own body where she was touched. Somehow, Jin’s whole body seemed to transform with this new awareness. She did not experience or remember it or feel the dirty touches at all, but knowing that it happened just made her tremble and feel disconnected from her own flesh.

“Can I leave, please?” she stuttered, looking to Vernon, who seemed utterly shocked himself. When he didn’t reply, she pushed him from in front of the door. He didn’t resist this time. She opened the door and left, dashing out of the room without looking back. When she was out of the building she heard fast footsteps behind her.

“Jin, wait!” came Vernon’s voice.

It took her a while to understand why what he said resonated with her and made her stop in her tracks. Jin. It was the first time he ever called her by her name and not “Frostbite.”

Her name on his lips felt so wrong, so discomforting, so lacking in the warmth and affection of “Frostbite.” It almost did not feel like it was Vernon who was saying it. It carried so much seriousness that she never associated with him. She hated it. It made her feel cold to her spine.

He caught up to her and stepped in front of her. “I’m sorry,” he said to her. She was not sure what he was apologizing for. The fact his friend touched her? How he insulted Sena? How he was so obstinate before in not letting her leave?

Everything in her head was way too messy for her to properly think about his apology. All she knew was that she wanted to be back at home with a pen and her diary in her hand. She wanted to sit down and process what happened to her, try to reconstruct a connection to her body that she now felt was lost.

“I’m so sorry,” Vernon repeated. She looked up at him. There was clear regret in his facial expression, and his eyes were imploring her to forgive him.

She walked past him though, because that dislike that she felt for him before stuck with her, and she did not want to even look at him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Diary,

Vernon’s roommate saw Seungcheol touch me when I was drunk and passed out. Knowing this makes me feel like a different person for some reason. I feel dirty, and I feel like I want to get out of my body because of it. It’s a terrible feeling, and it really makes me think about how Sena felt. I already feel like I want to disappear from the face of the earth, so if he had done anything more, I would have probably wanted to die.

I don’t remember it happening to me, and so I’ll get over it soon though. I already feel better since the initial shock. But I still feel so icky inside.

But, in a strange and twisted way, I’m happy that it came up when it did. I hate that it happened to me, but I’m also glad for what it brought about. Vernon finally believed me, and finally believed that his friend actually committed the crime. At first, he denied it completely, and said some really horrible things about Sena. I feel like I hate him for it. The fact he’s so quick to dismiss her and to say those derogatory things... I just feel like I can’t stand looking at him anymore.

How could something that had been so perfect for weeks be ruined in fifteen minutes?

A/N: this chapter was so hard to write omg. and yall will probably hate it lol. I’m sorry to all the verjin lovers (ie literally every single reader lol)

and the new cover is by lovely reader airhead98! thank you sooo much ;;

((now listen to this amazing song that made Wonwoo realize he’s in love <3))