Vernon appeared in front of Jin’s building in a motorcycle. Jin’s jaw dropped when she saw him. He didn’t expect her to ride in that, did he?

He stopped the motorcycle and pulled out an extra helmet from the compartment in the back and handed it to Jin.

Jin just stood there, hanging open, frozen. She had thought that the favor would be walking to library tutoring him for some English class or something, but it seems he wanted to take her somewhere farther than the library...

“Wear it,” Vernon said, shoving the helmet in her arms. Something was different about Vernon, Jin noticed. He looked agitated. There wasn’t this hint of a cheekiness in his expression like usual. He wasn’t grinning like he usually was. On the contrary, he looked angry and bothered.

“I don’t want to ride on that,” Jin said to him. She had an irrational fear of speed, and riding a motorcycle did not seem like something she wanted to do.

“Either ride with me, or take a taxi and pay for it yourself,” he spat. He looked so angry, impatient, and Jin felt cornered. “Come on,” he yelled, and Jin shuffled around as she put her bag down on the ground and put the helmet on.

Vernon took Jin’s bag from the ground and placed it in the compartment in the back. He then waited impatiently as she clumsily tightened the straps around her chin.

She was afraid. She knew that she was trembling. She felt like he was coercing into something dangerous, and she hated him for it. When he finished, he scooted forward on the seat to make room for her behind him. She gulped and took her seat.

“Hold on,” he told her. She hesitantly put her arms around his chest. It felt weird and she hated it, but the intimacy was really the last thing she could think about right now. He sped forward in the motorcycle, and Jin gasped as she saw the scenery around her zoom past her in unnatural speed. Jin couldn’t keep her eyes open, or she knew she would throw up. She held on tighter, and put her head against his back as he drove it.

They drove for many minutes. Jin tried opening her eyes a couple of times, but she could never get used it and stop her stomach from rising when she did. She kept her eyes closed.

She never got used to opening her eyes, but eventually, she got use to the loud sound of the motor and the beeping cars nearby. She also got used to feeling the wind in her face, and to holding on to Vernon for dear life.

When the motorcycle finally came to a complete halt, Jin was still holding onto his chest and her eyes were still closed.  She didn’t open them, even though, she knew they stopped. She was afraid that they were only at a stop sign, and Vernon would start it up again and make her throw up.

He had to pry her hands off of his chest before she understood that they had arrived at their destination.

Jin let him go and opened her eyes, feeling disoriented and losing her center of balance. She fell off the motorcycle dizzily onro the ground as she regained sense of what’s up and what’s down.

Meanwhile Vernon just glanced at Jin unsympathetically. He took off his helmet and stuffed it in the compartment, taking out Jin’s bag and throwing it on the ground beside her.

Jin regained her composure and took off her own helmet, handing it to him so that he could put it away, as she stood up with her bag. She found her center of balance again and finally took a look at where they were.

It was the hospital.

As Vernon locked up the motorcycle, he rushed inside. Jin hurriedly trudged behind him, hoping he would slow down because she was still recovering from the ride.

“Please wait,” she called.

He stopped running and walked slower, rolling his eyes at her.

When she caught up with him, she asked him why they were here.

He answered her in English: “so your name is Sofia. You're my sister. You’re only thirteen. You just came from a plane from New York. You’re doing well in all your classes…”

“What?”

“Play along,” Vernon said. It didn’t sound like an order, rather a request. “Your name is Sofia and you’re thirteen years old. You’re doing well in school. You just came from NewYork. Understand?”

“I don’t understand,” Jin replied in English as they walked into an elevator.

“Just play along okay?” Vernon said to her.

Jin still did not understand, but she nodded.

“As soon as you go in, just hug her, okay? She’ll immediately know that you’re Sofia.”

“Hug who?”

“My mom,” Vernon replied matter-of-factly, and Jin was more confused than ever.

Jin felt like the more questions she would ask, the more confused she would get.

“It will make sense when you see her,” Vernon said softly.

The elevator opened, and Vernon left it and effortlessly navigated through the hospital corridors. Some nurses even greeted him, and he greeted them back politely. Jin realized that he must be a frequent visitor there. He finally stopped at a particular door.

“Remember,” he said to Jin, “just go in and hug her. I’ll guide you through the rest.”

Jin nodded. Vernon opened the door and went inside. He motioned Jin forward, and Jin stepped inside. There, she saw a white woman sitting up on the bed, staring off into space.

“Who is it? Vernon? Is that you?” the woman said in a bit of a slur, still staring off into space. Jin then realized that the woman was blind.

Jin looked to Vernon, and he encouraged her towards the women with his hands. She went up closer to the woman, and put her arms around her like Vernon had instructed.

The woman started to cry, and also wrapped her arms around Jin, “oh Sofi, I miss you so much,”

“I miss you too mom,” Jin replied hesitantly in English when she got the nod of approval from Vernon. Jin was starting to understand her role now. She had to pretend to be this blind woman’s daughter.

Vernon’s mother stayed hugging Jin and crying into her shoulder for a many minutes. It was silent, but eventually, Jin eased into the hug and comfortingly tapped the woman’s shoulder.

When the woman finally pulled away, her hands traced the crevices of Jin’s face. Jin initially flinched at the contact, but allowed the woman the freedom to touch her. The woman’s then felt Jin’s hair, and later her hands travelled down to Jin’s chest, feeling her s and hips and then her face again. Jin wondered if the mother would actually fall for it. It didn’t seem possible that a mother would mistake her own daughter, even if she was blind. But judging by the mother’s trembling lips and the smile on her face, this mother did indeed fall for it.

“You’ve grown so much,” Vernon’s mother told her, “you were still a child the last time I saw you, and now you’re a woman. You must be so pretty.”

Vernon signaled to Jin to talk, and Jin replied, “I am very pretty, mom. I got it from you.”

Vernon’s mother smiled brightly, which made Jin inadvertently smile.

“How I wish I could see you,” the mother cried.

“I wish so too.”

“How is school?”

“It’s going well. I’m getting good grades.”

“Did you come from New York just to see me?”

Vernon nodded to Jin, telling Jin what to say. “Yes,” Jin replied, “just for you. I missed you so much.”

“I’m so happy,” Vernon’s mother said, hugging Jin again, “if you came only a few hours later, they would have taken me away. They’re transferring me, Sofi, can you imagine? They want me to live far away from where your brother is.” She started to cry, and Jin somehow felt a pang in her chest. She suddenly understood why Vernon wanted her so urgently.

“I’m sorry, mom,” Jin said. “Are you transferring far away?”

“He would have to take a eight-hour train ride,” the mom replied, sniffling as she wiped her eyes. “He said he would still visit me, but I’m not letting him. And so I am not putting him on the visitor list.”

Jin looked to Vernon to get guidance as to what to say next, but Vernon’s face was down and he was looking at the floor; he looked sad. Jin had to improvise: “Why not? If he wants to visit you, you should let him.” Jin kept looking at Vernon, to see if he would stop her.

“I’m not worth his weekends,” she started to cry.

“Mom, don’t say that. He loves you; for him, it’s worth it,” Jin said. She was hesitant speaking for him, but he didn’t stop her and so Jin felt like what she was saying was true.

“He has his own life to get to, sweetheart,” the mom said, “I hate being a burden.”

“You’re not a burden to him. I know him, mom. He loves you very much and he wants to see you. That’s all I will say on his behalf, but please do reconsider.”

“Oh Sofi,” the mother pulled Jin into another hug.

“How is he doing?” she asked, and Jin looked at Vernon to see what he would tell her.

Vernon gave Jin a thumbs-up. “He’s doing well,” Jin said.

“Do you know if he’s dating anyone?” the mom asks.

Jin looked to Vernon for the answer to that question. Vernon seemed uncomfortable with the question, but he shook his head.

“Not as far as I know,” Jin told his mother.

“I think he likes a girl,” his mother told Jin.

Jin looked at Vernon for guidance as to what to say next. Vernon quite anxiously shook his head.

“How do you know?” Jin improvised.

“Motherly instincts,” she said. “If he does date, I wish you would tell me. Can you call me if you find out?”

“Of course,” Jin said.

“Is he doing well in college? Do you know?”

Vernon nodded to her. “He is, mom. I saw his theology exam, actually,” she added of her own accord, “he got a high grade.”

“He told me about that,” the mom smiled, “theology is the last class I expected him to do well in.”

“He’s full of surprises,” Jin said honestly looking at Vernon, directing those words at him rather than his mother.

Jin eventually fell into conversation with the mother. In the end, she rarely needed to Vernon, and talked naturally to her. She told Vernon’s mother things that happened to her, pretending they happened to Sofia instead.

Jin told her about her jealousy of Sena, about her gay friend who’s having problems right now; she even told her about her feelings for Seokmin.

“He’s kind of my best friend, and so I’m so afraid of telling him how I really feel,” Jin said.

“Oh sweetheart, if he’s your best friend, he won’t let any bad things happen between you. If you love him, tell him. It might be kind of awkward at first, but it will settle soon,” the mother encouraged.

“He likes someone else though,” Jin said sadly, surprised how she was able to talk about this so easily in front of both Vernon and his mother.

“All the more reason to tell him, baby.”

“I will,” Jin said, “soon.”

“I wish you all the luck in the world, my girl. Tell me about him,” the mother asked.

Jin described Seokmin to her, as Vernon leaned against the wall and waited for the conversation to be over.

“He sounds perfect,” the mother said.

In about two hours, a couple of nurses came into the room.

“Mrs. Choi, the ambulance is ready to transfer you. Please say your goodbyes to your visitors.”

“Visitors?” Mrs. Choi asked, “there’s more than one?”

It was then than Vernon spoke up, “I’m here mom.”

Jin stepped back as Vernon sat at his mother’s bedside. His mother hugged him, and scolded him for not revealing himself earlier. She kissed him plenty of times, and thanked him for finally bringing her Sofia. She cried a lot. She implored the nurses for just 20 more minutes with her children, and they granted her that.

“Sofi, come here,” Mrs. Choi called out to Jin, who was standing at the side respectfully. She approached the bed, and sat on the other side of the woman. Mrs. Choi put both of her arms around them, hugging them tightly, telling them she loved them very much and that she missed them and that she wished she could see them. Jin noticed that Vernon was actually crying, but clearly trying to hide it.

She  eventually had to say goodbye. She kissed Jin’s forehead, telling her she hopes they would meet again soon. Jin reassured her that they would. Jin didn’t know if that was true, but it made the mother happy, and that was all that seemed to matter in the moment.

That’s not to say that it didn’t feel wrong. It did. It was deceptive, and Jin was not very comfortable impersonating a blind woman’s daughter and giving the woman false hope for something that was not actually there...

When Vernon and his mother said goodbye, Jin looked away because it felt invasive to watch. Vernon was crying. It was a strange sight to behold after being exposed the cheeky, confident and overly arrogant Vernon for so long.

Jin heard him begging to be added to her visitor’s list. He promised he would only visit once a month. Eventually, she assented, and told him that if he visited more than once a month she will remove him without hesitation.

They saw her off into the ambulance, Vernon holding her hand until the very last moment. When the ambulance that took her was out of sight, Vernon told Jin to wait in the lobby. Jin saw him go into a bathroom.

Jin took a seat in the lobby feeling overwhelmed with everything she learned...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Diary,

I’m in the lobby of a hospital, waiting for Vernon. He's in the bathroom. He is actually crying a lot, and I think he’s just too embarrassed to come out because of it. I don’t mind though.

He took me to the hospital so that I can pretend to be his sister, Sofia. His mom is white and can only speak English, and apparently she has not seen Sofia in years. One of her greatest wishes was to see her, and so Vernon made me her and took me to his mother.

His mother is blind. There is something else wrong with her too, psychologically, I don’t know what thought. The point is, she fell for it. She thought I was actually Sofia.

Vernon guided me through answering the questions, using signals our mouthing the answer for me to say when I was with her. Eventually, it became easier to talk with her, and I didn’t need Vernon anymore. It was weird, but I opened up to her, as if she were really my mother. I told her about the problems I’m having. Vernon was there listening, but I didn’t mind disclosing it all in front of him. He already knew all of my secrets anyways.

It was nice. It’s only now that I realize how much I miss my own mother. I miss talking to her about these kinds of things, but unfortunately she isn’t here to support me like she was in Jordan. I could tell her over the phone, but it’s not the same. Today, however, I felt like I had a mother temporarily. I really did embrace my role as Sofia.

And I watched Vernon cry when he said goodbye to her. She had to be transferred to another hospital eight hours away, and so they had to part. I never thought I would be able to see Vernon so vulnerable like that. It’s so weird.

That’s why it was so urgent that I came with him today. That’s why he threatened me; he really was desperate to make his mother happy. He was still wrong to threaten me, but forgivably wrong.

Also, and I know I might regret saying this later but… I don’t hate him anymore.

A/N:  nonjerk!vernon is back :P

Finally, I give you the VerJin chapter a lot of you have been waiting for lol. More to comeeeee ;)