MISHIL’s POV

I was sweating a lot from running. I heard my heart beat fast as I tried to slow down pace. I know he didn’t follow but why was I running anyway. I know it is not like he is the bad guy but then there is something on him that I don’t or I just can’t figure out. It feels like he knows me at all or maybe he just mistaken me from somebody. “Why would I care for somebody I don’t know. As far as I remember excluding the time I slept for almost 2 years, I know I don’t know him.”

I reached Yejin’s house and saw that the place is already in their proper place. “Yejin?” I asked when I can’t see her in the living room. “In here.” She said shouting from her bedroom. I usually barged in her bedroom before but she is not complaining to me because she also do the same thing to me. I laid down in her bed and just look at the ceiling. I heard the water pouring in the bathroom probably because Yejin is taking a shower. The sound is just like a rain. I felt myself becoming sleepy as my eyes started to drift off.

As I started to close my eyes. There is something that I see. It is like I’m watching a scene from a movie. The rain is pouring so hard. The guy crossed the street as she tried call and pull him. But the guy never look back. The girl is crying or it is just the rain that is pouring on her cheeks. She tried to follow as the car approached and is going hit her. Then I thought it is not just a scene. It is what had happened before. The day Suho oppa break up with me. The day when I tried to follow him and look for him. But then I continued to watch. It is like observing and watching myself from before. But then I thought why would I want this heart breaking scene when it would only bring tears in me? Then suddenly I heard Yejin’s voice while tapping my face. “Yah Mishil-ah. Wake up!” I opened my eyes and saw Yejin fully cloth. “You’re scaring me. I thought you would never wake up.” She sat down on her bed and put her sneakers.

“Sorry. I didn’t realize I slept.” At first I thought it is my memory but then the scene becomes different when I continued to watch. When I tried to cross the street, I know I was hit by the car. That is what I remember. That is the last thing happened to me before I was comatose. But why is it different? When I crossed the street, strong arms pulled as I looked the car passed by then I just look at the man turn his back to me after he checked on me if I was still alive when he thought I was going to hit by the car. Then I realized that maybe it is just a dream. Because I know that Suho oppa did not take one last glance to me that day. But it felt so real. So real that I thought that it really happened.

FLASHBACK (No One’s POV)

My knees were curled as my head was buried on my knees. I did not know how long I was on that position. I did not know if it is just a day had passed or it already took forever. I did not know if I’m crying or my tears had already dried from crying. I did not know what time is it since I can’t feel anything on my feet. What I can feel is the coldness. I opened my eyes and one thing I knows and understand, once again I am here in this place.

“Welcome again.” That voice sound welcoming. But I understand what I want. I know this is not what I want. “Do you already know why you’re here?”

I’m right this is definitely heaven. “No.” I answered firmly. I could not say if it is the truth or just pretending since I can’t understand what I am feeling. “I did not found anything when you sent me back on Earth.” I think of what to say again to make it clear. “I was puzzled for the whole time why my memories keep coming back on me. But then although I did not found anything about my life before, there is only one thing I am sure of. I still don’t want to return here. That I still wanted to be there again.” I stop for a moment. “That I still wanted to live.” I stand and saw the feathers or should I say my feathers scattered on my feet. “That I don’t actually need these feathers.”

“Those feathers are actually your wings.” He said after a moment. For the first time I clearly saw his face. It is not what I expected. “But then as you can see it was not attached on your back.” I take a look at them and saw that the feathers look lifeless on the ground.

“Why?” I asked shortly. I want to ask many things but that is the only thing I managed to say.

“Remember what I told you before why you don’t know why you’re here in the first place?” I shook my head to say no. “There are only two things why you go back to Earth. It is either you’re a lost soul or you can’t accept that you’re already dead.”

“Then what am I between the two?”

“For your knowledge, you’re not in the heaven yet.” He paused as he took my shocked face. ‘You’re still outside the gate of heavens. iN your case, you’re not yet dead. You’re a lost soul.” I do not know what to feel as I tried to absorb what he’s saying. I don’t know if I should be happy or not.

“I thought I was an angel. Then what are these feathers doing here?” My mind was twisted in knot as I figured what he’s saying. The more I think of it, the more I can’t find an answer.

“You’re body is still breathing on Earth. Those feathers are answers to yours. More like decision. When I sent you back, it is up to you whether you still wanted to live or not. If you choose to collect your feather without hesitation then you’re body would never wake up again and that wings would automatically be yours. But then if towards the end you chooses to stay --”

“Would that means I’m going back again with my real body this time?” I said cutting him off with an obvious happiness on my voice.

“Definitely.” He said. I know I’m excited. If I can’t stop myself I know I’m already jumping here. “I guessed someone’s already waiting for you. You can take that door and this would be the last time you would be seeing me again.” I approached the door he is taking me. Before I totally open the door, I look at him for the last time since I won’t be coming back again. Then once again, the light blurs my vision.

NO ONE’s POV

“You did not tell her.” An angel said to the man that Mishil is talking a while ago. His wings is purely gold in color. ‘You did not tell that she would not remember what happened during the time she’s collecting her feathers.”

“I know. But it is not necessary. Yes she would lost her memories…”

END OF FLASHBACK

MISHIL’s POV

After Yejin and I ate on my favourite pastry house, I dialled someone’s number. The person I never dared to talk to again when I woke up.

“Would you meet me here?” I said softly as I stare outside since my chair is facing the glass window. I waited for only ten minutes. I bet he’s really excited to see me. He pulled his chair as he stared at me.

“MIshil.” He called me as if we were still like before. “Would you want to hear my explanation now?” He said almost pleading.

“No.” I said but not angry or a bit harsh. The hatred is gone now I guess or that Is what I only want to feel. From the look on his face, I know he’s a bit disappointed. “I’m not angry you know. I—I--” I don’t know why I’m stuttering. “I forgave you. I know I would.” He smiled looking at his hands on the table. “I don’t want to go back at what had happened before. It still hurt when I tried to think about it.” As I said those words, I realize I’m a bit lying. Do I really feel hurt when I woke up and remembered those? But I think again. Maybe. I remembered my dream on yejin’s place. Maybe the dream was actually more like hoping for him to come back. “Would you still want me to be yours?” I take a deep breath because I know I’m already taking a risk. “Would you still want me to marry you?” I look in his eyes and saw how it sparkles as he heard my question. I knew it. I knew that it would be a yes.

SEHUN’s POV

I was there when they separated. I was there when Kai hyung tried to grip on her slowly fading body. I was there when they were crying even me, I cried because I actually don’t want Mishil to go. She left. She fade. It has been years. But how? I can’t help to ask myself. I drag Monggu to our new apartment. More like hangout place for us. When I reached our apartment, I took a sit on the couch nd tried to think it over and over again.

I felt it. She’s real. At first I thought maybe it’s just someone who is look like her but then again I felt her. She’s definitely… human. When I grip on her wrist, it is not the coldness on her skin that I felt. It’s actually warm. But then again how? I closed my eyes for a moment to get an answer but then someone slapped me on my face. “You’re spacing out.” Chanyeol said sitting beside me. ‘What are you thinking?” I look around me and saw that Kai hyung is not here. Probably outside.

“I saw Mishil.” I said and all of them stop what they are doing. They look at me like I was an idiotic person. It is only me, Baekhyun hyung, chanyeol hyung and Kyungsoo hung who witness what happened before so I know they understand what I am talking about.

“It’s not a good joke. If Kai heard you--”

“But I’m telling the truth. I even held her wrist. It’s real. I thought it’s a ghost. She even touch Monggu.” I said cutting Chanyeol hyung.

“has Mishil fallen once again here?” baekhyun hyung ask as took a sit near me.

“I guess not. I guess she is not the angel we know before. But I know she is Mishil.” I said almost pulling the lace on Monggu.

“I don’t understand you.” Kyungsoo hyung ask.

“I know it’s hard to explain. But Mishil, I think she’s actually alive. She’s warm. But one thing I can’t figure out.” I said looking at them. “She--She does not remember me.” I said sadly.

“Maybe you mistaken someone like how Kai always mistaken someone as Mishil.”

“No.” I said protesting. “I even ask her name. She said Mishil. And—and--” I said stuttering. “She’s still beautiful as before.” Then all of a sudden, Monggu run barking someone. I followed its direction and saw kai hyung crouching down to play with Mongggu,

“Who? Who did you say beautiful?” he asked. The four of us look each other whether to tell him about Mishil.

NO ONE’s POV

“You did not tell her.” An angel said to the man that Mishil is talking a while ago. His wings is purely gold in color. ‘You did not tell that she would not remember what happened during the time she’s collecting her feathers.”

“I know. But it is not necessary. Yes she would lost her memories…”

“But not until someone is so persistent to bring it back.”

A/N: Thank you lulu20lula, allyssaloves, Zein0717, toshiohime, leungkw18, nerdybunny1206 for commenting on my story and for giving me hope to continue. It is really precious to me. I may not gain more subscribers and upvotes but having you already makes me happy. Thank you very much. To others please continue to read the following chapters and please upvote and comment too. Thank you once again and goodnight. I still have to work on my thesis. I love you guys!