KAI’s POV

Everybody is happy skating and playing in ice. Some of them held their partners. They fell but there are someone who always catch them. They laughed and I just watched them. No matter how I tried to stop the tears from falling. I can’t. I simply can’t. If Mishil is here, maybe we are together skating in this skiing resort. I will hold her hand and hug her if she is cold. But everything is impossible now.

I’m holding the paper that I found in my jacket. I can still feel how hard she pressed the pen in the paper when writing. I looked at Mishil’s necklace and her ring and reminisce the days I am with her. Then suddenly a snowflake fell in my fingers. Then I heard someone is approaching in my direction.

“Kai.” I heard someone’s voice. At first I thought it is Mishil but when I turned around I found Boyun. “Kai.” She said repeating my name. When I looked at her, She seem so fragile. She’s not like someone I used to flirt before.

“What do you want?” I said with much coldness. “Why are you here in the first place? Did Suho hyung invite you here?” The bitterness is in my voice and so I did not look at her again.

“No.” She said faintly. I saw her biting her lip. More like suppressing herself not to cry but why? “I’m sorry.” She said then a tear suddenly slip on her eyes. “I’m really sorry.”

“Why are you apologizing suddenly?” I said creasing my forehead.

“The feather.” She said not looking at me. I saw the tears flow more in his eyes. I heard Chanyeol’s, Baekhyun’s, Suho’s voice and Sehun’s voice are nearing. I heard them laugh. But inside myself, I’m burning on the word she said. “The feather. I’m the one who gave it. I’m the one who found it.”

Flashback (Boyun’s POV)

I looked for my cellphone to text my friends to meet in the school’s rooftop. The cafeteria is full of loud students and I can’t concentrate on what I am doing. I also need to find Kai. I’m not done with him. I want to take him back. I’m the longest girlfriend Kai have ever had and I will not let myself to get defeated by that new student. As I continue to text my friends as I head to the rooftop, Kai suddenly passed me but he didn’t notice me because he was running. I tried to call him but he never looked back. “Kai.” He just made his way downstairs.

I don’t know why so I just let it passed. When I’m already at the rooftop, I saw Mishil and Kai’s friends. I’m not interested in their conversation not until I heard something I never heard before.

“Um… We already know what you are.” I heard Chanyeol said. What does he mean by what kind is Mishil. Of course she is hum--. My thoughts were interrupted when Baekhyun speak.

“We mean we did love you from what you are even if we did not know from the very start that you are an angel.” I gasped after hearing those words. Mishil is an angel? No wonder why her face is always paler than I thought. I tried to eaves dropped more but then suddenly I heard some footsteps coming close. I tried to hid behind the wall and I saw Kai enters the rooftop without noticing me once again. They didn’t know that Kai is already on their back and they still continue their conversation. I eavesdropped once more.

“By the way, is that your wings? Will you always need to catch it forever?” I heard Sehun said.

“No.” Mishil said looking at the feathers she was now holding. “I just need 100 feathers.”

“100 feathers for what?” Sehun asked as my mind also asked.

“To return in heaven.” My eyes widened in surprised at the same time Kai questioned her. Everything has limitation. I suddenly smiled to see how I can get rid of Mishil now. By that time Kai would be mine.

------------

Days after, I found that Kai and Mishil were not in good terms. I smell victory. A little push is good. I also heard that Suho oppa will also arrive from China. He held a business masquerade event and thank goodness that my family is also wealthy and they are also invited.

I am really happy. I saw Kai and his friends in tuxedo. All girls has mask on their face but only few men wear the mask. But there is one girl caught my attention and I know she should not be here. When Kai approaches the girl that is when I know that it is Mishil. I gripped the glass I am holding. I’m shaking in anger as I saw Kai dragging Mishil outside. Any minute I can spill the wine I am holding. Once again I eavesdropped.

Full of sweet words and affection came from them. But I could not take it. I knew Kai. He will never love Mishil. He can’t. He is a player. One sentence that made me smirk.

“I promise not to catch the last feather and live with you always.” Mishil said looking at Kai. Well, if Mishil won’t catch it, then I will.

-----

I became a stalker in their life. They all enjoyed their moments together as they went in the three days festival. They went inside the booth and I heard they are going to be wed mockingly. All of them are excited. I hid when I saw them went out the booth. I saw Mishil and Kai stiffened in their place and that when I saw a feather is falling in their place. I saw Kai hold Mishil’s hands tightly. I was there and I don’t know why but I suddenly feel hurt. Kai is serious and doesn’t want Mishil to go. The way she holds Mishil is the way I want someone to make me feel I am the last thing in the world. And so my heart feels the envy again.

Mishil did not take the last feather. She just let it fall and together they passed the feather. I looked at them one last time and then I took the feather in my hands.  Maybe next time.

Tao appear in front of me. “You’re planning to give it.” It’s not a question. It’s a statement. He did not held me back. He just look at me.

-----------

The last day of the festival came and I planned to give this right now. I saw a child. I approached him and promise him that I will buy him cotton candy if he will give the box with this feather to Mishil. And so he did. Everything is set according to the plan but my heart tell me that I am not happy.

End of Flashback (Back to Kai’s POV)

“Why?” I asked tears flow in my eyes again. “Why?” I shouted grabbing his shoulder. “Mishil is the only one I have. The only one I love. Why?” I shouted once more shaking her as she continued to cry. I heard CHanyeol run towards us.

“It’s Kai and Boyun.” Sehun said pointing to us.

“Why are you so selfish? Why?” I shouted again. Then I feel myself getting separated from her.

“Stop it Kai. You’re hurting her.” Suho said. Suho don’t have any clue about anything. I’m looking down as I saw the snowflakes fall in the ground.

“I’m sorry. I thought I’d be happy. But no. I regret everything Kai. I’m sorry.” She said. I cried. I wanted to shout. I want to burst out my feeling. Sehun put his shoulder in me but I shrugged my shoulder to let it fall. I run away from them not knowing where to go.

(Please play this… You may feel the scene heartly…)

“I’ll follow him.” I heard Sehun said and so with Chanyeol and Baekhyun. They are the only one who knew what happened to Mishil. “Kai.” They called my name but I never looked back

I walked farther and farther as I wished the snow would just eat me.

“Mishil where are you?” I asked as my hot tears flow.

Jongin-ssi. Do you still remember how harsh you are to me before? Do you still remember how you start loving me?

If I could turn back time, I would never be harsh to you Mishil. I would love you and treasure the moment I have with you. I would show how I wanted to be with you.

Do you know how I wanted to change you before? Do you know how I wanted you to fall with someone whom you will never play with? I never thought it is possible until you love me.

Mishil, If I could turn back time, I will never play with everyone’s heart and just wait for you. Please Mishil ah. Come back to me.

Jongin-ssi. You have heart. You are capable of loving. You just prove to me that a cold-hearted jerk like you could melt. You loved me and regret every moment that I didn’t realize it at once.

I’m begging you to be here once again. You just made me realize what love is and now you are gone. Why is fate so harsh to me? If I just knew that you would be gone, I just wished I didn’t catch the feathers before.

Kai. I love you. If I have never knew the first one I love I would always wanted to be loved by you. I would never waste my time looking for him instead I would give up everything loving you. It is wrong to wish that this world should be ours to have but more than that, I would want to wish that this moment would not stop.

I cried once again. My heart feels so heavy. “Mishil. Where are you? I just want to be with you. I want to see you. I want to hear your voice. I want to hold you. Please Mishil come back. You showed me the miracle of loving but when I realized what love is, you now left me.”

I become afraid of waking up. I’m afraid that when I opened my eyes I would never see you. This is the reason I wrote this letter. I may not be able to be with you always. If this is the last day I am going to be with you, let me tell you that I never wanted to be with anyone else aside from you.

I walked and I saw Mishil’s back. I smiled. “Mishil.” I walked faster to hold her hand. “Mishil.” I called her once again. I heard Sehun’s voice is running towards me again.

I realized that when I came here on Earth it is not the feather that counts, it is the moment I have with you. I am like a snowflake. I fell in your place but instead in your hand, I fell in the ground. When you suddenly wanted to touch me, I melt.

“Kai.” Just as Sehun’s words came to me, I hold Mishil’s arm and turned her around. I hugged her but she struggled. “Kai.” Chanyeol called me once again and trying to separate me from Mishil.

“Get off of me. I don’t know you.” The girl said as soon as she get away from me. She pushed me harshly like I am disgusting and I can’t help to loosened my hand to her.

“Mishil.” I said as my knees fell on the cold ice. “I thought that was Mishil.” I said laughing remorsefully. “I thought she came back.” I laughed but my tears is still flowing. “Sehun, Am I a bad person? Did Mishil left me because I’m not good before and I played the heart of everyone?”

“No so stop it now.” Sehun said.

“Mishil changed me.” I said crying. “Chanyeol hyung. I just wanted Mishil. I want to turn back time. I want to stop the time when we’re together. I would give up everything just for her. Just make her comeback here. I promise to be a better person. I promise.” I said while I wipe my tears harshly.

“Hyung.” Sehun said barely a whisper.

We did not have a good start. You pushed me away when I tried to cling on to you. But even if we did not have a good start, do you believe that we will not have a good end? Our love story is not like a fairytale but would you believe that if I will leave I will never come back? Kai…

“Doesn’t she said that she love me? Then why did she left me? Did I only dream of her? I love her. She said she will be mine always even if it is not forever? Then where is she? When I don’t know what love is, she suddenly came in and then when I already felt the feeling of being in love, she suddenly disappear.”

“Let’s go home now. It’s cold outside.” Baekhyun said.

“No. She would come back. I will wait for her here. She might fall again here. I promise myself to catch her. I promise this time that I would catch her with my arms and then I would never let her go this time. I promise to hug her. She might feel the cold once again. I promise.” I said in between my tears. “Just go back. I will wait here.” They pity me as I sound as a crazy person.

I hug the necklace and the ring. “Mishil I’m sorry. Mishil I love you.” I repeated those words. “Comeback.” I said still crying.

…would you still want to catch me if I fall once again?

A/N: It’s been a long time again… at last I used Miracles in December here. I just hope that you felt the scene… The italic part on Kai's POV is the letter that Mishil wrote. Please comment. Subscribe and upvote!!!!