Wonwoo

I felt tired but satisfied. Talking about all the feelings that I've tried to bury was very taxing and I was glad that the bench we brought here before was still intact. I sat down on it, slumping my head down on the table while Doyoon followed after me. 

"Tired?" He asked, tilting his head at my direction. 

"Mhm." I mumbled, feeling quite drained. Crying did always tire me out which was why I tried to avoid it as much as possible. I let out a small yawn, wondering if we could stay here a bit so I could nap. 

Doyoon chuckled, patting my head gently. Of course he knew I was tired; he was probably right when he said that he knew me the best. "Go on and nap. I promise not to do anything you wouldn't want me to." He flashed me a smirk.

I rolled his eyes, lightly swatting at him. "Shut up so I can sleep then." 

Doyoon laughed at that, amused at my violence probably. He knew I loved sleeping anyway. I rolled my eyes again before making myself comfortable. In a matter of seconds, I was out like a light.

--

My dream came in vivid flashes of color, not making any sense at the start until the colors settled and I could see Doyoon's face, a much younger version of him, pulling on my hand as we headed to the field. It was a scene very familiar to me as I kept replaying it when I was younger. Even now, I could feel all the emotions that I felt then-- excitement, nervousness and so much happiness that he was holding my hand. 

"Why are we here, Dodo?" 

"I uh... I love you, Wonwoo. Please be my boyfriend!" 

Then the scene changed and it was just random bursts of images--our first kiss, our first date, just the two of us enjoying being together. As more and more images resurfaced, the time between them grew shorter and shorter until it felt like I was the one running to catch up. I was almost panting by the time it stopped and I saw Seungcheol's face, tensed and looking sadder than ever. 

"What do you mean?" The dream me asked, panic creeping into my voice. I wanted to turn away, to wake up or at least skip this part of the dream. Why did I have to see this again?

Seungcheol sighed, holding onto my wrist as he repeated what he had said earlier. I already knew the words; they haunted my every dream for the past two years. I didn't need to hear this. 

"Doyoon's gone. He wanted me to tell you that he left." Seungcheol finally said and I could feel my-both my own and my dream version's- heart breaking. 

"He... left.. me?" I asked in a small voice before breaking down into tears. 

Luckily, the scene changed after that but the damage was done. The pain I had felt was back and I tried not to see the bursts of images within those two years. I looked and felt so horrible during those times that I began crying when I saw them again. The bursts slowed down when Seungkwan introduced me to Hansol, bringing a slight smile on my face. The smile grew bigger and more genuine when the dream stopped at the time Hansol and I moved in together. 

"Hyung, I'm so calling dibs! My room!" Hansol exclaimed as he dived into the bed. 

I chuckled, entering the room as I looked around. "Fine, you can have this one. You're still helping me unpack though."

Hansol nodded as he patted the space beside him. "I'm the one that came from another country but you have so much more stuff but I'll help, no worries." He sighed when he saw that I didn't move. "Come here, hyung." 

I laughed at his impatience, going over to the bed and crawling to the space beside him. He immediately grabbed me in a hug, my body stiffening under the circumstances I've had in the past year. I saw the look of hurt in my dongsaeng's eyes that I didn't see back then and felt horrible about my reaction. 

"Hyung..." Hansol whispered, not letting go despite my reaction. 

"Yes, Sol?" I whispered back, trying to make up for it by using the nickname I gave him. It seemed to work since he smiled up at me. 

"I don't know who the was that did this to you but I promise not to let it happen again. I'm going to cuddle and hug you every single day so you'll get used to affections again. And anyone who wants to try and date you has to go through me!" Hansol announced proudly. 

I smiled as I watched my dream self break down into tears upon hearing what Sol had said while my brother began panicking before hugging me even tighter. I had felt truly touched by those words and given the fact that we hadn't known each other for a long time, it made Hansol even more amazing in my eyes. The image faded when Hansol started singing purposely off key to make me laugh. 

The next scene was somehow expected. I mean, there weren't any other special milestones in my life after meeting Hansol so I knew what was next. I inhaled sharply, suddenly missing Mingyu once I saw him in my dream. I was at Shining Diamond, nursing my drink that Soonyoung gave me. Not that I knew that I would befriend Soonyoung in the future. That the guy I was ogling from the sides would be my boyfriend. I laughed when my dream self ran away after talking to Mingyu quickly because I was that nervous. 

The colors changed again but like before I expected it. I smiled again when I watched how flustered Mingyu was when we first met properly. 

"Wonwoo. It's nice to meet you, babe." My dream self said confidently though I was a bunch of nerves inside. I was pretty amazed that I pulled it off actually. 

The next flashes of images were the different times I spent with Mingyu ever since that day. There would be some moments with Jihoon and Soonyoung as well and the scenes filled me with warmth. It felt so nice seeing them again. The last image was when Mingyu told me about the date with Doyoon and the warmth slowly trickled away. 

"Wait, you're okay with me going on a date with Doyoon...?" I asked slowly, not getting why he would be. 

Mingyu looked around, biting his lip. "I-is Hansol home?" 

"No, he's out with Chan." I answered, frowning at him. "Don't change the topic. Answer me."

Mingyu sighed and then he got that look that meant he wasn't comfortable with the question and would rather leave it unanswered. I frowned as he just kept quiet, wondering if he was just going to pretend like I didn't ask anything or make up an excuse to leave.

"I'm not... well, I'm not jumping for joy that you're going on a date with Doyoon hyung of course." Mingyu finally said and I noticed that he was blushing. It made me smile and gave me some hope but that got squashed by what he said next. "But I'm not your actual boyfriend or anything. He asked me under the assumption that we were actually dating but we... we both know that this is just fake so it's up to you if you want to go with him." 

"Ah." I looked down, trying to mask the hurt that was threatening to swallow me. I could never hide my emotions well so I didn't raise my head though I could feel Mingyu's eyes on me. I cleared my throat. "If... if that's all then maybe you should go. I'm actually feeling pretty tired."

My words sounded lame and unconvincing even to my own ears and I waited for Mingyu to ask me what was wrong. We'd talk about the whole thing-how it wasn't pretend, never was for me and how we felt towards each other- and everything would be fine. But it didn't come. Mingyu just said a quiet goodbye before leaving, leaving me in a mess of emotions. 

"Wonwoo? Wonwoo, wake up! Yah, Jeon Wonwoo!" 

I woke up feeling disoriented and more exhausted than I was before. So much for the nap helping me. I looked at Doyoon, his eyes shining with worry as he carefully sat down beside me. His frown was fully in place as he leaned closer and wiped something on my cheeks. I blinked at him, bringing my own hands on my cheeks and realized that I was crying. I sniffed and wiped at my eyes while Doyoon watched me. 

"Easy there. Your eyes are going to get irritated." He admonished when I rubbed my eyes harshly. He pulled at my wrists until they were on my lap and he was looking at me expectantly. "Bad dream?"

I sniffed again as I nodded. "It... it wasn't a dream dream." 

"What does that mean?" 

"It was more like multiple flashbacks rolled into one." I looked around and noticed how the colors of the sky changed already. "How long was I out?"

"An hour or two? Probably two though." Doyoon squinted his eyes. Then he frowned before looking down. "D-did you dream about that moment?" 

It took me an embarrassingly long minute before I understood what he meant. I chewed on my lip and wondered if I should be honest even though it would upset him. In the end, I decided against lying since Doyoon would probably call me out on it pretty quick anyway. "Yeah, I did." His frown deepened so I hurriedly added, "But that wasn't what I'm crying about. I think. Probably. Okay so maybe it is? But it's not just that."

Doyoon chuckled though it was tinged with nervousness. "Those are a lot of words, Won. Confusing words too. Mind explaining it more?" 

I sighed, fiddling with my thumbs. "I did see... that moment again but that's not really the only reason I cried. I.. I think it's mostly because of Mingyu honestly."

"Gyu? What did he do to make you cry? I thought the two of you were all lovey dovey up in your own paradise." 

I swallowed, feeling a lump lodged in my throat. That was what I thought as well. Did Mingyu seriously think that this is all of fake? Could someone act as long as we've been together and not feel anything at all? We even slept together, in every sense of the word. Did that mean nothing at all for him? 

I didn't realize I was crying again until Doyoon patted my back, his free hand getting his handkerchief before giving it to me. I took it gratefully, trying to pull myself back together. I just felt so confused and hurt. What if Mingyu really didn't feel anything for me? What would I do then? 

"Listen, Mingyu did look troubled before but he didn't tell me why. You're not telling me why either so I'll just give a general advice. Mingyu is a bit stupid if you haven't noticed so try not to take whatever it is to heart. He isn't good at expressing himself either so he probably just blurted out a wrong word." Doyoon said confidently, smiling at me. "Stop crying, yeah?" 

"We're not really dating." I blurted out. His smile left and he was looking at me quizzically, nodding for me to go on. "He asked me to become his fake boyfriend so Soonyoung and the others would stop setting him up on blind dates." 

"Fake...boyfriend...You?" Doyoon said slowly, processing the words. "Tell me everything." 

And I did. A part of me was wondering what I was doing, telling this secret to the person that had broken my heart but I knew that despite everything that had happened, Doyoon was still someone I could tell anything to so I did. I avoided looking at his expression while I told him everything but when I happened to peek, he was keeping his face neutral though there was some tightness in his eyes. By the time I was done, I felt parched and out of breath. This day was becoming one of the most tiring ones in my life. Even so, it felt nice too. I didn't realize how tiring keeping the thing a secret was until now. It was like a weight was removed from my chest. 

"I.. I didn't expect your relationship at all to be fake or at least start out like that. Won, I'm sure you've noticed how Mingyu acts and looks at you. That can't be fake. He was so jealous of me too." Doyoon said.

I raised an eyebrow; there was a catch in his voice. "But..?" 

"But this isn't fair to you. I'm not telling you what to do but after all that's happened, you don't deserve this. You deserve someone that will treat you like his everything. And I want it to be Mingyu but without any reservations. I want him to be dead certain that he wants and loves you." Doyoon said with so much sincerity that I had to smile. He pressed a quick kiss on the crown of my head. "And what does Cheol have to say about this?" 

"Nothing." I flushed. "Uh, he doesn't know. Not yet." 

He smirked. "I'm so going to be lording this over him when you do tell him." 

"You're so stupid." I said, rolling my eyes. 

"Me and Cheol." Doyoon stuck his tongue out, making me laugh. He smiled back at me, eyes turning serious with a hint of concerned. "Talk to Mingyu about it okay? Clear everything. You deserve nothing but the best, Wonwoo." 

--

I was quiet on the drive back home while trying to ignore the worried looks Doyoon was sending me. I knew he felt partly responsible for the whole thing with Mingyu even though he shouldn't be. I made this mess and everything happening within it was my own fault. I grumbled slightly before turning away, hopefully to get some dream free shut eye. 

Luckily, I got my request and was only woken up in front of my apartment complex. I had agreed to tell Doyoon where I lived since we were back to being friends again and there was no harm in doing so. When I peeked out, Hansol and Seungcheol were waiting for me, looking quite hilarious with their arms crossed over their chests. I let out a snort which made Doyoon laugh. 

"Does Hansol hit people?" Doyoon asked. 

I nodded. "He punched Mingyu before." 

"When I was flirting with him?" 

I frowned because I had forgotten that Mingyu and I had a fight about him before. I punched his arm before unlocking my door. "Maybe you do deserve to get punched by Sol." 

Doyoon laughed but he was rubbing the area I punched. I knew that I had gotten a bit stronger and even though, we had called peace between us, hitting him still felt good. Hansol immediately hugged me the moment I stepped out of the car while Seungcheol was quietly assessing Doyoon. 

"Abeonim never looked me down so don't try it now, Cheol." Doyoon said, rolling his eyes as he bumped shoulders with Seungcheol..

"Shut up." Seungcheol said a bit embarrassed but then he looked at me. "You okay? Do we need to punch him?"

"I'm okay. Really." I chuckled at Hansol's disgruntled face. "I think you just want to punch Doyoon, Sol." 

"Can I? Just once, I swear." Hansol pleaded at me. 

I rolled my eyes, pulling him towards the entrance. "No, Hansol. I told you that violence is bad." I ignored the snorts from Seungcheol and Doyoon. These two honestly. "I'm tired and hungry though. Let's focus on that." I turned back to the hyungs. "Are you two coming or what?" 

"We'll pass." Seungcheol answered, hooking his arm around Doyoon's shoulders. "I think I'll interrogate this bastard first. Get some rest, Won." 

Seungcheol was making it sound playful but I knew that he would be drilling Doyoon with questions. I shot Doyoon a panicked and pleading glance. I didn't want Seungcheol to find out the truth from somebody else. Luckily, Doyoon seemed to understand me, nodding at Seungcheol before sending me a wink and an assuring smile. Hansol and I waved at them as they got into Doyoon's car and drove away. 

"Why did he wink at you?" Hansol asked as we rode the elevator. I was hoping that he didn't see that but of course, he did. Hansol was very observant after all. 

"Uh..." I looked at my dongsaeng, my brother and made my decision. I wanted to tell him the truth as well. "I'll explain over dinner, okay?" 

Hansol looked at me, mouth pressed into a thin line and I knew that he wanted to ask me more about it. I looked at him pleadingly, making him sigh and nod his assent. He started talking about a new mix tape he was making while I listened, commenting here and there. Hansol was visibly less tensed by the time we walked in the apartment, him pulling me to the kitchen quickly. I looked at the food on the table, making a mental note to thank Jun for this later. Hansol hummed as he set the table, telling me to just sit down. 

"You really want to ask me huh?" I remarked as I began eating. Hansol was just moving his food around and was shooting me glances every now and then. 

Hansol smiled sheepishly. "That obvious?"

"Very." I laughed, pinching his cheek. "Go and ask then. Don't want you to die from the suspense."

"What happened today?" He looked at me seriously and I could see how worried he must have been the whole day. 

"We talked about things, why he left and why he came back." Hansol's eyebrows shot up and I paused, thinking he would ask something but he just shook his head and motioned for me to continue. "We first went to Myungsoo hyung's exhibit. Do you remember him? The really good looking guy with Doyoon's brother?" I continued once he nodded. "Then we had lunch at their place. Mrs. Jang was there and.. uhm, she talked to me as well. She apologized while crying for her son's mistakes." Hansol reached for my hand, squeezing it gently and I smiled gratefully. "We went to my dad's grave as well so Doyoon could apologize. We ended up to our field, our own spot. I cried a lot; he cried a lot. It was a very tiring date and I don't recommend you and Chan to try it." 

"Chan's a crybaby anyway." Hansol scoffed but his eyes softened. "Are you okay now though?"

"I am." I said honestly, smiling at him. "It feels so much better now that everything's been cleared. I don't know if I've completely forgiven him but we're back to being friends at least." 

"You've forgiven him because you're an angel and you're weird." Hansol tilted his head. "So he winked at you because you're friends now?" 

"No. I told him a secret that... uh, you and Seungcheol don't know." 

"What?" Hansol exclaimed. "What the hell? Hyung!" 

"I'm sorry." I pouted at him. "I wasn't sure what came to my mind that I just told him." 

"That isn't the issue here!" Hansol sighed. "Fine, whatever. Are you going to tell me or not?" 

I looked at Hansol, thinking about the times he had spent together with Mingyu and his friends. Would that change if I told him? But he looked hurt when I said that I was keeping something from him and I didn't want to hurt my brother. "I'm fake dating Mingyu." 

To my surprise, Hansol laughed. He continued laughing so I started whining because this wasn't funny at all. What the hell? Hansol finally calmed down, looking at me with an impish grin. "Sorry about that. What do you mean by you're fake dating Mingyu hyung? You two make me cringe whenever I'm with you guys." 

"He asked me to become his fake boyfriend and we just... ended up here." I explained lamely. 

Hansol hummed. "I thought you guys met through a blind date actually. I am your brother after all and I'm pretty sure I would know if a guy was hovering around you then all of a sudden you have a boyfriend." He tilted his head. "It's not fake now though is it? If it is, then maybe you need to switch courses. You'd make a really good actor." He smirked.

I smacked his arm, face heating up. "I was drunk that time! Let it go!" I rolled my eyes when he just laughed. "I hate you. This is a serious matter and you're just laughing about it." 

Hansol smiled at me, all innocent and genuine. "I don't mean to offend you or anything, hyung. It's just... well, what are you worrying about? You love him and he obviously loves you. Just talk to him and then you can be a real cringe worthy couple." 

"Just like that?" I asked him doubtfully. Could things really be that easy? 

"Just like that." Hansol stood up, kissing my cheek. "Go and sleep. I'll clean up here." 

I ruffled his hair, smiling my thanks before heading to my room. I was too tired for a shower so I just plopped down on my bed and thought about what Hansol had said. He had taken it fairly easily compared to Doyoon's reaction this afternoon. They both thought that Mingyu was really in love with me though. Not to sound arrogant but I'm pretty sure that he did feel something for me. I saw it in the way he looked at me when he thought I didn't notice, how gentle he was with me and just about everything he did spelled it out for me. 

But what if I was just seeing those things because I wanted to? What if it didn't mean anything for him? 

I rubbed my temples. I was just giving myself a headache with all this thinking. I glanced at the clock and noticed that it was already time for Mingyu's shift. I missed him though so I sent a quick message which he would hopefully read soon. 

To: My Mingyu 

Mingyuuuu 

From: My Mingyu 

Yes? 

You home already? 

I sat up when I received his reply. I wasn't expecting a reply until later honestly. I had to smile at his message as well. I knew he was asking if I was still with Doyoon without making it too obvious. I could read you well, Kim Mingyu. 

To: My Mingyu 

Yep. :D 

Hansol's cleaning up so I'm just lazing around

Are you at work?? 

From: My Mingyu

That's good then :) 

Get some rest, baby. You must be tired

I am but it's a slow night even if I'm alone

To: My Mingyu

:") 

I'm talking to you though and I missed you. 

I'll rest later. 

Soonyoung's preparing for the dance showcase right? 

From: My Mingyu

Yeah he is.

Jihoon hyung's either very mean or very sad

I don't think I can handle him like that :( 

From: My Mingyu

And I miss you too, baby xx

Get some rest for me, okay? 

I'll see you tomorrow.

Dream of me xx 

My cheeks were already hurting by how wide I was smiling which was pretty embarrassing honestly. Maybe Hansol was right. Sorting this out was going to be a piece of cake. Tomorrow. We're going to clear this up tomorrow, come clean to our friends and start out as a real couple with no worries. I couldn't wait for it. 

To: My Mingyu

Always do. xx 

See you tomorrow, love.

Goodnight. <3 

A.N: heyyyyyy!! I remember someone asking me if I could write it from Wonwoo's perspective but I wanted to, in the right time. And now is the right time. Haha. I don't know why I wrote it in the first person but... it happened like that.

First day of second sem today and I am part thrilled and part sleepy. Night classes dilemmas. 

Tell me what you guys think! <3 thank you for all the wonderful comments especially at the last chapter. I appreciated it and I loved how you guys were able to sympathize with Doyoon which was my goal tbh. :") thank you for that really! It was a huge relief. 

Love all of you and please don't hate me in the future. xx 

 A.N: i am running out of chapter titles istg