Jongin's POV

 

As our comeback date drew closer, we were practicing later into the night so that we could present the best performance we could to our fans. But Kyungie and I always made it a point to be home before the boys' bedtime. 

 

With time so limited and stretched across our many obligations, we were often exhausted by the end of the day. 

 

But every time we reached home, no matter how tired we were, we always had the best energizer waiting for us at home. 

 

You know what the great thing about babies was? They were like little bundles of hope. Like the future in a basket. Each time we walked through the door after a long tiring day, their short chubby arms reached out towards us in excitement. Toothless grins lit up their faces and they always seemed to be eagerly welcoming us home. 

 

Kyungie and I usually showered in the company building before returning home so that we could fill our arms with our babies the minute we reached home.

 

Today was no different. The minute we walked through the dormitory door, they started squirming and reaching out towards us. 

 

I immediately grabbed the nearest baby and lifted him into my arms. Jungwoo. It was way too early for him to be talking anyhow but I saw in his eyes something. 

 

A voice. 

 

A whole new set of words. 

 

Just that we as adults did not understand. 

 

 

I was nothing special, of that I was sure. I was simply a common man with common thoughts and I had led a common life. Although my chosen career was that of an idol and I could be considered as famous, there would be no monuments dedicated to me and my name would be forgotten in the future. 

 

But I loved Kyungie and our twins with all my heart and soul, and that, to me, had always been enough..

 

To make my life worthwhile. 

 

To make my being meaningful. 

 

To make me special. 

 

 

 

 

Bringing his tiny head close to mine, I whispered into his ear. 

 

 

 

"I love you more than there are stars in the sky and fish in the sea."'

 

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Kyungsoo’s POV

 

 

Picking up Dongwoo, I blew raspberries on his belly. I continued to nuzzle my nose as he smiled and grabbed fistfuls of my hair. 

 

"How have you been, Dongwoo ya? Did you miss daddy?" 

 

Dongwoo just smiled and gurgled some words that I couldn't make out. Then he yawned and turned his little body towards me, before snuggling close and shutting his eyes. As I rocked Dongwoo to sleep, I looked up to find Jongin rocking Jungwoo to sleep as well. 

 

Watching Jongin love on Jungwoo made my heart swell with pride for how much he had blossomed into a fine an matured young man. The love he had for the twins knew no boundaries; I knew that he would swim any sea and climb any mountain for them. No questions about that. 

 

Soon both babies were fast asleep. As I set Dongwoo back down in his crib, a tiny smile flickered across his sleeping face. 

 

"Sweet dreams, my love," I whispered as I gave him a little kiss on his forehead. 

 

After leaving the baby monitor in the bedroom, I headed towards the kitchen to prepared some supper for the hungry members. 

 

Then Baekhyun came to my side and pulled me into a quiet room. 

 

"What's going on, Baek ah?"

 

"I need to speak with you. In private."

 

"Ok? Let me get this done and we'll go for a stroll in the park."

 

 

After letting Jongin know where I was going, I accompanied Baek to the park. On the way there, he hardly said a word. Instead he looked deep in thought. His face knotted into a frown of concentration and distress; his eyes were rained at his feet. He only spoke when we sat down on a bench in the park. 

 

"Kyung ah... What should I do?"

 

"What's going on?"

 

"Yeollie. He wants a child so desperately. It's driving a wall between us. Like an unspeakable territory. Like a divide between us. Like a hidden boundary. I feel so pressured to give him a child, just to please him. I know he doesn't want to force anything on me since he hasn't tried to bring the subject up with me but I know how much he wants a kid. That's the unspoken truth. What should I do?"

 

"Why does Chanyeol want a kid so badly?"

 

"I'm not too certain but I have seen the longing in his eyes. Especially when he is with the twins. A look of hope. A wish. A desire. As much as I would love to have a child with him, how could I possibly do so with this man-child lover of mine?"

 

"Well, His usual playful and mischievous demeanor seems to have quietened down a notch these days," I offered. 

 

"True but he won't even go near a spiked diaper when the boys needed a diaper change and you guys were not around. He just gags and runs away, leaving me to change the diaper. He plays way too much computer games. And he doesn't even remember our anniversary!"

 

"Well, you may be surprised at how much a person can grow when placed under the right amount of pressure and given the right amount of responsibility. Look at Jongin. Remember how he was so unkempt and messy and forgetful? He could never find this shirt or that pants etc. but look at him now. Taking responsibility of our little family. I've seen the love in his eyes when he looks at our sons. The look that says he would stop at nothing for them. A deep desire that stems from the depths of his heart to do right by me and the boys. From the day I told him that I was pregnant till this day, he had never failed me once. Always taking the initiative to read all the baby books. Taking over the household chores from me. And I have zero doubt that he will continue to do so in the future. Of course I'm not saying that Chanyeol will change. But neither am I implying that he won't. Maybe, given the chance, he will grow to exceed your expectations, just like Jongin exceeded mine."

 

"Ha. Then he'll have a lot of growing up to do."

 

Sarcasm? That was unlike Baek. 

 

"You don't want a child with him," I said in a deadpan voice. 

 

"I do. Right now, I feel like I have an obligation to him. Like I said, I am aware of how much he wants a baby with me. Deep in my heart, I do too; he is my better half after all."

 

"Baek ah, don't bring a child into this world if it is for the sake of pleasing him. My pregnancy was definitely not planned. Not that I regret it; it was the best 'mistake' of my life. But you have to consider many things. The most obvious being our status as a idol group. Our lives are under the public's microscope with every single detail closely scrutinized. I don't think we will be able to hide the twin's existence forever. Then you have to be ready for all your priorities to rearrange. Your baby will take the upmost importance. Your own needs will have to give way to your baby's wants. Time, money, sleep, freedom. All these will have to go. That being said, your life will change. For the better. Your perspective on life will change completely and you will view the world in a different light. It becomes brighter, more meaningful, much much better."

 

"I know. I do know that."

 

 

 

Something seemed a little off. Somehow he seemed conflicted and troubled. Like his heart and his mind didn't agree. Like something was holding him back. 

 

"Tell me honestly, Baek. Do you want a child?"

 

"Yes."

 

"With Chanyeol?"

 

"Yes."

 

"While I agree right now may not be the right time with the comeback and all, what is holding you back? From at least talking about it with Chanyeol?"

 

 

He didn't say anything. His face contorted with a sense of....

 

 

 

Fear?

 

A fear of judgment. 

 

A mark of guilt. 

 

 

 

 

A burden of insecurity. 

 

 

He swallowed hard to ease away the painful lump in his throat before he hung his head and whispered. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"I am afraid to fail. To fail to get pregnant. To fail to carry a child. To fail as a parent. 

 

 

To fail him."

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A/N: finally, I have Internet connection.

Here's a short update. 

Enjoy and leave a comment. ^^

 

And what do you guys think about their solo shots?