I kept my head down as Jaehyo drove towards our university. I felt bad that he had come so far out of his way just to pick me up but he wouldn’t accept my gratitude. He said he was doing it mostly to make sure that I was still alive. I thought killing myself was too dramatic even if the thought had crossed my mind a few times over the weekend. “Your parents seem happy to have you back.” He smiled and patted my thigh. He had a strange obsession with my thighs – so did Yongguk but I wasn’t going to think about that – and he always touched them when he saw me regardless of if my boyfriend was around or not. That didn’t help me in my attempts to make Yongguk like him.

I cringed slightly and thought about how my mother had made a huge to-do about sending me off to school. She’d forced me to bend down so she could kiss my forehead and my father gave me a tight hug as though he was afraid I wouldn’t come home again. Then my mother handed me my schoolbooks and a sack lunch and went back to her daily duties. “Yeah.”

He nodded his head and grabbed my hand. I didn’t question him when he laced our fingers together and pulled my hand towards him. “How are you feeling, Chan?”

“Alive.” I stared out the windshield and tried to block out anything else he would want to say. I wasn’t really in the mood for conversation. It was taking most of my energy to keep myself from crying. I missed Yongguk. I missed waking up in his arms and I missed cuddling with him under ten blankets as we talked about our days. “Jaehyo… I’m not in the mood to talk…”

“Okay.” He sighed, “I’ll stop.” He pressed a kiss to the back of my hand as we pulled into the parking lot. I gave him a soft smile so he wouldn’t feel guilty about not making me feel better. There was nothing he could do.

“I’m not going to do anything stupid.” I told him and he nodded his head. My parents had asked if I was having any bad thoughts several times so it was safe to assume Jaehyo had the same fears. He squeezed my hand again before pulling his hand back so he could park once he finally spotted a parking spot. I moved my hand into my lap as I watched him.

I got out of the car once he had turned off the ignition and leaned against it until he had exited as well. He came over to my side and wrapped an arm around my waist. He was treating me differently than usual and I wasn’t sure I liked it. It didn’t feel right to be in his arms. “I’m cutting class today so I’ll see you at lunch.”

“Have fun with Daehyun-ah.” I nodded my head and pulled out of his arms so I could walk in the direction of my class.

The rest of the day was a blur and before I knew it I was back home with my parents. My mother was asking me about my day and trying to give me sweets and my father was watching us interact. Things had never been this way before. It was weird. “Mum, please stop?” I held my hands up after my mother hand run her hands through my hair for the millionth time.

She smiled and then scurried off to do something. I was going to go crazy if she kept this up. I felt a little bad for not letting her know where I was for four years but I stood by my decision.

I sighed and pushed myself up from the chair and grabbed my wallet off of the counter. “I’m going out. I’ll see you in the morning.” I waved at my father and then walked out of the apartment.

I ended up at the bar near my old apartment and got completely sloshed. I didn’t think I had ever ingested so much alcohol in such a short period of time. Everything was spinning and if felt fantastic. I found it quite enjoyable to grind up against strangers and let men hold onto my waist and grab my legs and .

I was having a brilliant time with this giant when I was suddenly pulled in a different direction. I grinned and turned around to face the person that had grabbed me but my smile immediately fell when I saw Yongguk’s rapper friend. I tried to push him away but he pulled me into my chest and held me tight. “What are you doing Himchan?” He dragged me out of the club despite my protests and sat us down on a bench outside. “What the hell? That guy was all over you!”

“Doesn’t matter.” I slurred and I could tell by the look on his face that he didn’t know what Yongguk had done to me.

“It matters! You’ve got a fiancé at home and you’re letting men you?”

“He cheated. So we broke up.” I hit his chest as hard as I could but he just pulled me closer. “He ruined everything! He ruined me!”

I broke down into tears again and He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me into his lap. I heard his voice but I didn’t understand what he was saying. I didn’t like the way he was my head and I was sure he was telling me that Yongguk would never cheat. They were friends he was obligated to defend my ex.

I put my feet on the bench next to us and buried my face in his shoulder. I didn’t care what this guy thought of me, I wasn’t even completely sure he was who I thought he was. “Next time you see Yongguk will you tell him that I’m doing fine Hanhae-ssi?” I mumbled once my tears had dried up. I didn’t want Yongguk to know that I was having a hard time with the break up.

He sighed and said something else I didn’t understand and allowed myself to doze off in his arms. He was friends with Yongguk I was sure I could trust him not to murder me in my sleep. That might have been the booze thinking though. 
________
So here's this. I'm exploding from school. So I'm off to do that now.
Hanhae is in this chapter. Hanhae was in the original line up for Block B with Yukwon, Zico, Kyung, and Mino. Mino is now Taegoon from BOM. 

This snaggletooth is Hanhae. He has braces now. So disappointed.
He raps and sings and he's in Phantom now.