Junhyung couldn't stay and have brunch with us. His manager called and told him the president called for an emergency meeting for their album release and debut date. He hugged me and was about to kiss me on on the lips when he saw Seunghyun glaring at him from the corner of his eye, and decided to direct his lips on my cheek instead.

'GD&TOP' as the staff from YG calls them, took me to this fancy restaurant about 20 minutes away from the house. It was a typical American restaurant. "What's up Hyun, haven't seen you in awhile" GD asked while sipping on his orange juice. "Oppa, you saw me two days ago" I stuck my tongue out. "I'm just trying to make converstion here. The car ride was so quiet" he squirmed in his seat. It was true. The car ride was quiet. Awkward actually. After my sudden outburst of confession that I just did the dirty deed with my boyfriend, Seunghyun oppa didn't even talk to me after that

"Ooooppaaa~" I sang while giving him my 'Puss' eyes. You know, the cute cat from 'Shrek'? Yeah, he can't resist these eyes. "Hyunae" he sighed. I smiled and beamed at him. I stood up from my seat and went behind him, leaning forward wrapping my arms around his neck, hugging him from behind. "Oppa, mianhe. Hmm??" I put on my aegyo for him. I hate doing aegyo, but I know my oppa can't resist it.

"Arasso, I forgive you. So let me go, you're choking me" he faked a cough. "Yay!" I kissed his cheek and let go. I went back to my seat with a huge grin on my face. "Yah, do you like it that much?" he asked. I nodded enthusiastically. Seunghyun doesn't hate Junhyung. He just hates it when he gets touchy with me, let alone the thought of having .

"You know, if people didn't know that you two are siblings, they might think you're dating" GD said bluntly. I choked on a piece of bread. "What?!" That is disgusting. The thought of dating my brother? I admit he's good looking but I know my brother more than anyone else. Seunghyun just chuckled in his seat. "I'm just saying" he shrugged.

We talked for a while about the most ramdomest things. Who knew the charismatic rapper and leader of Big Bang are wierdos. Then the topic shifted off to idols and their lifestyle. Since my boyfriend was going to debut pretty soon, they let me in on what really happens during their trainees days and their lifestyle after debut.

"Training is hell" Seunghyun started. "Gotta wake up early in the morning and go to the company. Sometime you just stay there and watch your sunbaes practice. Sometimes you just clean the practice rooms then head home. But once you've done your part, people would start noticing you and then the magic begins. You get to actually practice. Vocals and dancing." It's tougher than I thought. They explained to me their hardships and now I admire them even more.

"What happens after debut?" I asked innocently. GD tapped his fingers on the table. "Well, usually rookies don't get that much attention. If people like you, they like you. If they don't, they don't. If they don't, then of course you'll feel like all that hard work you've done has been put to waste. You'll feel bad. But all you do is try and try. If you love what you do, it doesn't matter if you have 10 or 1 fan. You'll perform your heart out for that 1 fan. Then when your time comes, people will notice you and your music and then BAM! you're famous" he grinned. I was mesmerized by his words. Leader indeed.

"Then" Seunghyun interrupted, "Once you get famous, everything is out there." GD nodded to his statement. He continued, "People will start digging up your past. Your family, friends, past relationships, etc. Those who hate you will reveal your darkest past, while those who love you protects you. As for me, people don't know about us yet. They don't know you or our parents. All they know is I was chubby when I was little" he laughed along with GD.

I sat there thinking about what he said. If Junhyung gets famous, they'll dig up things about his past. They'll know about his parent's divorce and me. "Hyun?" GD interrupted my thoughts. "Huh"

"You're thinking about Junhyung aren't you?" I nodded. "To be honest Hyun, I don't want to scare you but it's gonna happen. Junhyung is a pretty good rapper. He's got a nice flow and he got some major swag. Plus, he writes his own lyrics. Those are extra points. Girls are gonna swarm him and eventually they'll know who he is and his background."

"That's why" Seunghyun cuts in, "Be careful." My face fell. What they're saying is true. "So you want me to break up with him?" My eyes were getting blurry. "No, of course not. I'm just saying to be careful. I know no one knows about you two except some friends from high school, us , and his friends and managers. I suggest just pull out your pictures off online and lay low. I heard they're going to start some documentary before debut and after it airs, they're gonna gain more fans."

My face fell again. It just hit me. Junhyung will get famous and his fans will dig up about his past. They're going to know everything about him, including me. What's gonna happen if they find out he has a girlfriend? His boss will separate us. His fans will hate me and possibly him. I can't do that. I'm not gonna be the reason why he can't enjoy living his dream.

5/7/12