Eunbi turned the channel to Beast's documentary. I haven't been keeping up with this. So there we were, sitting on the couch side by side after I heard the news. I didn't know what to do. I had no idea what to tell my parents, my brother, and especially Junhyung. I was spacing out thinking of how I should spill this news to my parents and brother. Them, I can handle. I know they'll be dissapointed and angry for a while, but I know they'll calm down and accept it. But Junhyung oppa? I don't know how he's going to take it. It's not like he can quit what he hasn't even started yet. Ughhh, I ruffled my hair, annoyed. Eunbi looked at me, a little scared.

Beast was sitting in their living room watching tv. Dongwoon was doing a selfcam and he focused on each member. They were watching some documentary about how the number of young parents in Korea is increasing. "I'm one of them," I muttered. "Are you going to tell him?" Eunbi asked while pointing at the tv screen where Junhyung's face was showing. Then the next scene was an individual interview. The question was 'What would you do if you were a parent at this age' My ears perked up, waiting for his answer. I can see Eunbi from the corner of my eyes, glancing at me.

"A baby right now?" he chuckled. "I don't see that happening right now" my face fell. "I don't have a girlfriend. No one in the group does. And I can't see myself with a family right now. I'm still young and a baby is out of the picture for now. But in the future for sure, I would love to have a family. I just want to focus on my career right now, so in the future I can support my family," he smiled after finishing his statement.

"Well... there goes my answer," I stood up and walked up the stairs. I laid down in bed trying to sink in what he just said. "He doesn't want a baby right now. Not now." I glanced over at the clock next to my bed, 7:45pm. I decided to call my brother. "Oppa? I know you're busy right now but I have something to tell you." I went back downstairs to find Eunbi still watching the documentary. I plopped down next to her. "You okay?" she asked and I nodded slowly. She didn't want to say anything since she knew I didn't want to talk about it anymore.

Exactly half an hour later, the doorbell rang. "You expecting someone?" I got up from the couch, "Yeah, Seunghyun oppa." I opened the door and let him inside. Out of the people that I had to break the news of me being pregnant, Seunghyun oppa was the easiest. I know he'll be dissapointed, but he'll be on my side.

"What's up? It's pretty late at night for you to call all of a sudden" he questioned as he sat on the couch. I sat infront of him on the coffee table. "Oppa, promise me you won't go balistic when I tell you this." I was dead serious. "Alright" he gulped down.

I took a deep breath, "I'm pregnant" I bit my lip and waited for his response.
His face was emotionless. Eunbi and I stared at him for a while. "YOU'RE WHAT??!!" he jumped up and waved his hands frantically. Okay maybe he won't be on my side. "What the Hyunae?! You're only 18! What were you thinking?" I was about to open my mouth to speak, only to get cut off by him. "Since when? How far are you? Does mom and dad know? What about Junhyung?" he bombarded me with questions as he walked around the living room. I feel terrible at his moment. If the person I thought would take this easy is reacting like this, then my parents would be worst. I was on the verge of crying and my body was shaking uncontrollably. Eunbi held my hands for support.

"Well??!" he asked me again, his chest was heaving up and down from his heavy breathing. He softened abit after seeing me crying and obviously afraid. He came closer and it was his turn to sit on the coffee table and face me. "Alright," he sighed. "Talk to me."

I sniffled my words, "I wasn't feeling good since yesterday. I threw up so many times and I thought I just ate something bad. But Eunbi dragged me to see her mom and ..." I looked down. He tilted my chin and made me face him, urging me to continue. "She told me I was three weeks pregnant. Oppa, what do I do?" He pulled me into a hug and I buried my face in his chest, soaking his shirt  with my tears. "It's alright Hyun. We'll figure it out" he said, caressing my head.

-----

"I can't tell him oppa" I said queitly
"He has to know Hyunae. He has a big responsibility now"
I shook my head, "Please oppa" I pleaded to him. I know he's willing to just barge in Beast's dorm and tell Junhyung straight up, but I can't let him do that.
"Junhyung doesn't want a baby right now" Eunbi blurted out and I whipped my head to give her a deadly glare
"What?" Seunghyun yelled at her
"Well, we were watching their documentary and he stated that" she shrugged. I swear I'm gonna kill this girl. She turned to me and mouthed 'sorry'
"So you're not gonna tell him because he said he doesn't want a baby right now?"
"Yeah. Oppa, I swear he'll know. He has to know. But not now huh?" I pleaded to him again. "I'll tell him in the future I swear. He's gonna know. Just... not now" I was just blurting out every possible excuse for him not to tell Junhyung himself.
"Alright. Fine, it's up to you. But you're gonna tell mom and dad as soon as they come back." I nodded.
"Come here" I walked towards him and he engulfed me in a hug. "Damn it Hyun. I warned him to take responsibility if anything happens. I threatened to kill him if he runs away. But you're the one not wanting him to know. What the hell does that make me?" he chuckled.

We all settled down in the living room. I asked both of them to stay with me for the night since I didn't want to be alone for tonight. Just then, the front door opened and I heard my parent's voice calling out for me...

5/16/12