Summary: Drafts are just winter winds blowing in.

DRAFT

Dear Yeol,
Sometimes I wish you just cared more and told me about your feelings because you're not very good at talking to me and we can't kiss and watch mr. Gordon Ramsay and forget about everything like we usually do. (Make a new paragraph?) Because you're not here and I'm not there. I don't like long distance relationships, it makes me feel really bad about myself but I also don't like how it makes me mad at you because I know you're not trying to make me cry but it just happens and that just makes it feel like it's my fault and you know how the wheels go around and around on bus? (a bit repetitive maybe?) I can't focus at school because sometimes I'm preoccupied wondering about you and how you're doing and if you still feel the same way because I know you said you give rides to your coworker sometimes but that makes me really jealous, too, so it makes me not feel very good. And it also upsets me how you don't say I love you back or tell me you miss me every day. It bothers me a lot... I know you're busy and I am too, but I want to make this work. Sometimes I wish I just picked a school in Korea just to stay near you. Part of me says coming here was a mistake even though I worked hard to get here :c But I just want to be closer to you. Also, I know I've been really stressed and maybe unreasonable recently and I'm sorry because that's not how I am but it's been a while and I can't shake feeling like I'm not happy with how we've been handling this relationship and it's stressful on top of school and everything, but I just want this to work out. It's sad but sometimes you're all that I think about. I mean, I can't really

Last Updated 4 days ago

Chanyeol stays silent. The bathroom door's locked and he's sitting on the edge of the tub like a ing idiot.

His hand grips Baekhyun's phone tightly as he stares at the floor.

Updated 4 days ago...

That was before he even got to California— the night before Baekhyun's last exam. That makes it pretty ing recent, but it's clear that all of Baekhyun's feelings have been lingering there for a while now.

Chanyeol isn't  stupid.

Of course he knows, but... .

He didn't think it was this bad— That this ing relationship was making even harder on the runt and his school work.

For 's sake, he's going to one of the best schools in the world, and that idiot's wasting his time and energy on some boyfriend back in Korea? Half-way around the ing world whose working as a mechanic?

That's a ty story to tell everybody.

Chanyeol laughs to himself but it's hollow.

Goddamn it.

Standing up, he looks at the phone in his hand and sets it on the sink. He puts a hand on either side of the counter, leaning against it with his head hung.

A part of him doesn't want to think about it, but judging by the reminder on Baekhyun's phone, completely highlighting what the runt has planned for later.

Chanyeol can't help but think how maybe all could've been avoided if that little runt never approached him in the first place...

If they just never ing met.

The knock on the door brings his attention back to reality.

"Yeol? Are you in there?"

He doesn't want to reply... but he has to. "Yeah."

"Are you okay? It's been 15 minutes and you didn't come back!" Baekhyun sounds concerned. "Does your tummy hurt? I have medicine!"

Raising his head, Chanyeol meets his reflection in the mirror.

When the hell did he start looking so goddamn sad all the time?

.

. . .

"I'm fine. I just needed to use the restroom."

"Oh, okay!" There's a pause. "By the way, my phone wasn't on the kitchen counter. I don't know where it is..."

Chanyeol's eyes move over to the cellphone. Then he looks away. "I'll help you look for it later... Just give me a few more minutes," the gangster manages to say. It's getting harder to speak. For some reason, his throat feels dry.

Must be the winter cold...

A/n: 👀 if you know you know

Ps : the draft rambles bc that's what drafts do!! Lol anyways

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