Mattress Wh0res

Think About It

Summary: Chanyeol's a gangster and Baekhyun wants to go home with him.
 


Throughout the rest of the week, Baekhyun practices his lines like his life depends on it--the same five lines that Chanyeol is ing tired of hearing, but the second that Jongin complains about it, the gangster boss throws a death glare.

"What the did you say?"

Jongin chokes on the baby carrot that's halfway down his throat. "Oh, uh—Nothing. These carrots sure are orange, huh? Right, Sehun?"

"Yeah. They have no business being that orange."

Chanyeol continues to glare at him until Baekhyun catches his attention again. While the gang's eating, the little runt is walking around the roof top, practicing his walk and other things the drama teacher taught him to do for the play taking place on Saturday.

"Yah! Stop messing around and eat your lunchbox." Chanyeol grabs Sehun's hand to glance at the time on the boy's watch. "You have five minutes before the period ends."

"I know, I know!" Baekhyun tells him, sighing. He stops what he's doing (which looks like he's trying to kiss the air) and skips over to the rest of the Handsomest Boys Gang. As he's settling down, Chanyeol hands his lunch box out to him. Once the brunet takes it from his hands, he sits down on the concrete ground. "Have you guys bought your tickets yet? They're on sale for $5! Oh, but if you wait to buy them at the door on Saturday, they'll be $10."

"We bought them yesterday from that nerd friend of yours—Jongdae." Sehun laughs, recalling how scared the boy was when he was being cornered by their Big Boss. "What's the play about anyways?"

"Yeah. Are there gonna be girls there?" Jongin sticks out his tongue. "EUHEUH!"

Sehun does the same, but more aggressively. "EUEHUEH!"

Chanyeol gives them an annoyed (and disgusted) look but Baekhyun giggles. He loves silly gangsters.

"It's, like, this weird fairytale mix of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves, except... Well. I don't really know, but there's supposed to be this prince who'll come and save the sleeping princess from evil." Baekhyun tries to remember the script. "And, she wakes up from her true love's first kiss! Except there's supposed to be, like, four princes and some fairies. I think we're going to have zombie dwarves, too!"

"That sounds complicated," Jongin comments, brows raised. "What's your part again?"

"Oh, I have a very important part." Proudly, Baekhyun puffs out his chest (and his cheeks). "I'm Boyfriend Boy Toy."

"What the kind of role is that?" Chanyeol says, snorting. He stops himself from rolling his eyes. "Boyfriend Boy Toy?"

"Well, you call me your boy ! It sounds the same," Baekhyun counters.

"It's not the same--"

Sehun coughs. "The bell's gonna ring in a few minutes." Packing his things back into his (brand new) lunch bag, the gangster also asks everyone if they have any trash. "We shouldn't litter. Girls don't wanna boys who litter or else what's left? Dirty tiddies?"

"You're more smartest now," Jongin nods, agreeing with the wisdom. 

"Tch. You know what they say," Sehun shrugs, "Reuse, Re--um.. Reuse and Recycle."

 


 

After school, Chanyeol waits by the front gate since the little runt likes to say good-bye to all of his friends before leaving (turns out he's kind of popular even though he talks a lot). Once Baekhyun pops out of the building, Chanyeol prepares himself for the usual ritual.

1) Greet each other (i.e. Baekhyun says hi and the gangster grunts)

2) Hand "holding" (or as Chanyeol calls it, making sure the idiot doesn't walk off)

3) Optional other forms of "skinship" 

And, like always, Baekhyun does all three. 

The only thing different is that once Chanyeol starts to make the turn to start walking in the direction of Baekhyun's house, the brunet stops in his track, pulling the giant into a halt as well.

Looking back at him, Chanyeol gives him a puzzled look. "What? Did you forget something?"

Pursing his lips, Baekhyun shakes his head. "Actually... We can't go to my house today. Can we go to yours?"

"What's wrong with going to yours?" Chanyeol questions.

"Well, you know! I've never been to your house and, um, my house is so boring." Baekhyun smiles as he tightens the gentle grip that he has on the giant's hand. "Plus, I want to meet your mom!"

"Listen, idiot--"

"Pleaaase?"

Baekhyun gives him those stupid, fat brown eyes. 

Chanyeol thinks about it for a moment. He's not hesitating on the fact that he'd be bringing the boy to his house, because who the cares. It's not like they're there to do anything, and his mom is constantly bothering him to bring Baekhyun over since he spends so much time over at his house anyways.

It feels ing weird.

"We can watch Hell's Kitchen in your room this time! Like... a reverse sleepover, but it's not really a sleepover because, well, I'm not sleeping over." Baekhyun's trying really hard to sell the idea, and it's obvious. "You can show me around your room like Junmyeon did. He said the bed's where he pets his snake, which I think is weird, because that's a weird place to pet a snake! Sehun says it's where he likes to tickle-and-le reusable tiddies nowadays, but every person has a different room, so you should show me yours!"

Chanyeol looks at him blankly. Contrary to the amount of stupidity that just came out of the runt's mouth, Baekhyun seems pleased with himself and his logic. 

"Or--"

Covering the brunet's mouth, Chanyeol stops him. "Fine."

The gangster can feel a small gasp.

"But once we get there, don't touch anything. And if you break something, the room tour's over."

Baekhyun replies, but his words are muffled by the gangster's hand, so Chanyeol removes it.

"But what if we break your bed?" Baekhyun curiously asks. "Junmyeonnie said that he does the so hard, his parents bought him a memory foam mattress!"

The mere mention of Junmyeonnie is annoying. "If you like his memory foam so much, why don't you call him and ask if you can sleep over."

Baekhyun frowns. "Why would I do that?"

"Because he's your Junmyeonnie." Chanyeol rolls his eyes as he starts walking in the direction of his home. 

"He's not my Junmyeonnie." Surprisingly, Baekhyun also seems a bit...annoyed. Raising his voice, he huffily exclaims, "I'm just saying! What if we break the bed from ing!?"

They're still near the high school. Without even looking around, Chanyeol can already tell that other students heard the brunet. 

"I swear, if you don't shut up, I'm taking you straight to your house," Chanyeol threatens, pointing in the other direction. His runt immediately closes his mouth and listens. "And you know what'll happen if I take you back to your house? Nothing. I'm dropping you off and you can kiss season ten episode six good-bye. Is that what you want?"

"No--"

"Then be quiet and stop talking about our private business out loud." The gangster didn't mean to sound so damn strict. "And stop bringing up Junmyeonnie and his magical mattress foam. I don't want you thinking about that rich snob when you're at my house. Got it?"

Baekhyun quietly nods.

"Good." 

Then, Chanyeol starts guiding them on the street again.  

 


a/n: get it. Mattress Wars.

sighs...

leave me a vote and a comment to um reuse reused and recycle more smarter.

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Comments

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Kiwi-C
#1
Chapter 30: This is so freakishly funny
But the thing that killed me is the Cascada song o(≧∀≦)o
rbdgirl
#2
Beautiful story thank you:)
rbdgirl
#3
Chapter 88: if exo were here they would help
rbdgirl
#4
Chapter 81: So cute:)
rbdgirl
#5
Chapter 55: Jab my heart it is at wattpad
rbdgirl
#6
Chapter 11: I love the drama sabrina and salem
rbdgirl
#7
Chapter 7: Well done baek:)
Galaxyboo_
#8
Chapter 80: Aww no why they become ex-es 😭
Galaxyboo_
#9
Chapter 61: Awww chanyeolli getting soft
Galaxyboo_
#10
Chapter 56: Pkease i can't stop laughing 😂 😂