Winter Wonderland

‘What do you mean by what is my deal?  You are the one being thoughtless!’ My finger emphasized my smaller feet. ‘How could you just go lunch with a man that obviously isn't having friendly feelings for you only!’ I’m shouting that deserves conviction. You are barely 4 feet apart. I’m at the volume as if you on the other side of a four way road. What is our deal? 'He is only a friend! It isn't like you don't know him! He is freaking ONEW!' You yell back.

You are yelling. I was yelling. The cycle of the unecessary booming volume continues. You are angry, loud and aggressive. I am defensive, frustrated and a little suffocated. ‘What is your deal?’ You spat the words as we reach that pinnacle of our escalation. You look at me with rage. The reason how this outburst started a blur. However both of us are overly blazing in this heat. 

You let out a sigh. I bet you are exhausted. I am. ‘Fine. Enough. Just forget it.’ you say that word carelessly as you try to end it. ‘What is fine?’ I shot back. ‘Drop it.' you state it coldly as a warning. My turn. I lean back my head. ‘We always drop it, Sica. Then what? Are we going to follow up with the usual phase of cold war?’ You glare at my factual retort. 

‘Taengoo.’ the earlier intensity of you displayed soften as my name leaves your lips. ‘What do you want from me? Fight till one of us are spilling out blood?’ I am at a lost for words despite being the more articulate one. You look at me with tears forming in your eyes. You must have hit your peak. Anger spilling over like a kettle that has over boiled water as it’s content. 

In pure reflex, I grabbed you and hugged you tightly. ‘I hate it.’ I speak as your first few tears begin to stain my shirt. The strip shirt you bought for me last christmas. ‘I want no fights between us.' My mouth kept moving. No longer was there a filter between my heart and tongue.  'I want a bed of roses for us without any torn to prick us. I want a winter wonderland where we can play and be happy. I want a place where a relationship truly meant a world for two. A world where judgement doesn’t exist. Where all’s opinon is lovely and sweet. Most importantly, I want to make you the happiest lady.’ 

Her skinny arms finally wraps around my body. We stayed that way in silence. Soaking in not only the warmth but the presence of each other as well. After that she gently peels away but still within the confinement of my arm. Automatically, my right hand lifted up. Using my thumb I wipe the lingering tears that were making their way down. 

‘If we ever had a winter wonderland, I would be a single lady again in no time.’ You smile mischievously at the end of your jab at my intolerance of the cold. I played along and gave a really pitiful expression. You giggled then snuggled into my embrace once more. ‘I could hug you for warmth or we could do something more...’ I said out loud. 

The moment my brain rejistered that I had spoke without much thought, you were already giving a weird look. ‘YAH ByunTAE!!!!’ You then pretended to run away from me. I gave chase for the simple fact that if I was to be erted, my prey could only be you. 

When I finally caught you and our little game of catching had ceased, we decided to call it a day. Now I hold you with your back facing me on your soft palace. I couldn’t help but smile. Your breathing was light, guess you had fallen asleep. 

‘Thank you for being here.’ I confessed. I proceeded to kiss the back of your head. Next adjusting myself for sleep. I lean my head gently on yours and slightly tightening my cuddle of you. If every winter had this as the ending, then a winter wonderland does exist.